


Hell and High Waters

by IHearttheHitachiinTwins



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Asexual Alastor (Hazbin Hotel), Asexual Character, Body Horror, Cannibalism, Cannibalistic Thoughts, Explicit Language, Flooding, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Torture, Kidnapping, M/M, Magic, Minor Character Death, One specific writer got me on board with this ship, Rivalry, Slut Shaming, Storms, Temporary Character Death, This one goes out to them, Torture, Transformation, Violence, Worldbuilding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:55:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 38,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23164348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IHearttheHitachiinTwins/pseuds/IHearttheHitachiinTwins
Summary: Hell doesn't do weather halfway. Blistering heat, earthquakes, cloudy with a chance of falling demons. When a storm hits, all anyone can do is hunker down and hope that your building is still standing at the end of it all.Valentino finds himself worrying for his lover as a storm rages outside and Alistor is anaccounted for. Despite the resassurances of his allies, he finds himself more and more convinced that Alistor has found himself in trouble.(An initial plot followed by a series of one-shots and parted works in the same universe.)
Relationships: Alastor/Valentino (Hazbin Hotel)
Comments: 62
Kudos: 168





	1. Hell and High Waters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HuntingPeople](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HuntingPeople/gifts).



“Will you quit pacing? You’re making me dizzy.”

Vox griped as Valentino did yet another lap of his living room. Back in front of the window, behind the desk and the sofa, around the white deer rug that took up the centre of the room, and finally sweeping back to the window. Outside, the entirety of hell shook as thunder and lightning rattled the sky. Rain pounded against the roof of the building, creating a deafening drumming that even the impeccable soundproofing of the porn studio couldn’t drown out. Valentono twitched at every rumble of thunder, restlessly flitting around the room as his companions watched him uselessly. 

“I’m not pacing.”The louse snapped, hands tightening around his cane. Vox rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you are. Quit it. Your loverboy is _fine_. I couldn’t kill the fucker in the sixty years I tried, it’ll take more than a storm to take Bambi out.”

“Your doe is tough, Val. Don’t worry.” Velvet nodded, scrolling through her phone intently, leaning into Vox. “This signal is so patchy… Damn it. Vox!”

“Hold your horses, reception is bad.”

The TV demon closed his eyes and the wifi signal on his hat began to glow. Val’s phone started to ding as it connected to Vox’s personal wifi. The storm had knocked out the studio’s internet and not even the biggest wads of cash could get a repair team out there in weather like this. Luckily, being friends with hell’s number one technology mogul had perks.

Val snatched up his phone and scrolled through his notifications eagerly, hoping for news. Endless messages by actors and actresses saying they couldn’t come in today because of the weather. News blips, all about the storm raging on, and no one knowing when it would stop. They stretched on for seemingly forever, but none of them were what he wanted, needed really, to see. Velvet had taken the time to look up at him and gauge his reaction When he dug his teeth into his lip and closed his phone, she sighed.

“Have you called him?” She asked. Val nodded.

“Like, four times, it just rings out.” Any other time, she might have teased him. Hell, she _did_ when she got here and he was fretting like a mother hen. But that had been hours ago and fretting had long turned into legitimate worry. This wasn’t the time and wouldn’t fix anything. Val slumped into his desk chair, fiddling with his cane with the lower pair of hands while the upper pair crossed over his chest, fingers tapping on his arm. “I hate not knowing so much.”, he muttered to himself, but Velvet caught it anyway.

The subject of his distress was, of course, Alastor. His boyfriend was supposed to come to the studio after his work at the hotel was done today, He’d had one stop to make on the way over, and then he would come to Val’s penthouse to watch a movie with them. Alastor didn’t really understand the ‘picture shows’, as he called them, but it allowed the extroverted pimp to spend time with all his favorite demons with minimal Vox on Alastor violence. Finding a middle ground on genre had been a struggle, but eventually they’d found a cache of movies that were modern enough to satisfy Vox and Velvet, but didn’t confuse Alastor. Although some of the horror movies they watched had made him hungry.

They’d had Watership Down lined up for tonight. Alastor had read the book when he was alive and had seemed sceptical when he found out it had been adapted, but was at the very least open to the idea of watching it. A very different story to when Vox had insisted on The Matrix. Alastor hadn’t made it to the end of that one. The deer demon had been as excited as he was capable of getting about a movie, so Val had started to get antsy when the ever punctual Radio Demon had been five minutes late. Figuring he was delayed by the rain, he had waited patiently as the other two arrived and prepared snacks for the members of the meeting that could actually eat (Vox huffed and grumbled about stupid screens). Five minutes turned to ten. Ten turned to thirty, which turned into an hour, which bled into four. The food got cold and the overlords got impatient as Alastor got later and later, all while the storm had raged outside, only growing in severity.

Val had rung the princess, apparently Alastor had left the Hotel on time.

Something had happened between then and now, and nobody knew what it was. Velvet and Vox kept telling him that it was probably just the storm. That he had found somewhere to camp and wait out the weather. Val’s mind still whirred with scenarios. Somethin bad must have happened, because what sort of storm could delay a creature that could teleport? Hell was a violent place and demons would use any excuse they thought they had to pick a fight, even one they didn’t stand a chance against.

It only took one lucky hit….

Valentino scrambled for his phone again. Ringing Alastor yet again and tapping his heel anxiously as it rang and rang and rang…

Damn it.

Val’s throat felt tight, he felt like he could hardly breathe. He stood up and started walking for the door. He needed a smoke and even his Arturo Fuentes weren’t gonna cut it today. His pipe was in his break room, along with what he would need to take his mind off his missing lover.

“Where ya going?” Vox called, sounding… Almost concerned. “You’d better not be going out there. Blitzen will be fine, but if you go out there lookin’ for him, you’re just gonna get hurt.”

Val swallowed, flicking an antennae. 

“Relax. I’m just going to get my pipe. Don’t get your wires in a twist.”

Vox rolled his eyes, muttering something along the lines of ‘it was one time…’. “Fine, just don’t do anything stupid.”

Val nodded. Usually he would make a pass about not knowing Vox cared, but he wasn’t in the right space for that right now, too occupied by anxiety. He took the elevator down to the second floor, making his way over to where he’d left his drugs. 

It wasn’t often that Val indulged in something stronger than a cigar or two, but this was extreme circumstances. As he packed the white powder into the bowl of the pipe, he wandered over to the window, flicking his lighter absently. This was significantly closer to ground level and he could see the lower parts of the city beginning to gather water. The beginnings of a flood. God, that was gonna be hell to sort out later. Water damage to everything. But hell got frequent earthquakes, and every building in pentagram was built to withstand a great deal more than a few feet of water, so the building itself would be fine.

The sweet smell and white smoke that began wafting from the pipe curled around him like an old friend. Trying to ease the tension from his back and caress him, much like Alastor’s own shadow did for him. He took some smoke into his lungs and held it there, letting the high embrace him. A soft, floaty feeling took the jagged edge off his worry, leaving more of a dull pressure in his chest. 

Problem not solved, but it was better.

He continued to stare out the window. Letting the rain-blurred shapes of Pentagram City dissolve into something more abstract. It was sort of beautiful, in a way. Kind of-

A flash of lighting, accompanied by a mighty crash of thunder threw Val for a loop, and he took a few steps back. In the brief second before the darkness ate the light, he thought he saw a figure hunched in the growing water on the street. Some homeless imp who got caught out in the storm, most likely. It would probably drown, if it didn’t freeze, or get buffeted apart by the merciless winds of the lust district. 

These thoughts made something cold curl in Valentino’s gut, even though he couldn’t give two shits about the imp. 

Was it an imp?

He hadn’t gotten a very good look. Could those shapes have been horns? Or were they ears? The figure hadn’t looked too tall, but the rain had obscured anything he could have used for a scale reference. They had been collapsed. On their knees in the rising water, hunched over. Details had been hard to make out. He pressed up against the window, trying to get another look. He waited impatiently for the next bolt to light up the street. It couldn’t come fast enough, and by the time Val got another visual, the figure had keeled over into the water. It was even less distinct in the murk, but that was definitely a splash of red among the grey.

Panic pushed through the drugs and he turned tail and bolted towards the elevator. His heels clacked against the tile as he all but ran to the elevator. Down to the first floor and to the door, he flung the doors open with no regard for the howling winds outside. Water poured over his shoes, but he didn’t care in the slightest. There was almost three feet of water on the street, but it barely went up to Valentino’s knees. He was soaked in seconds, the rain drenching his coat and dragging the fur collar down. Valentino waded out to where he’d seen the shape, only to be met with emptiness and murky water. 

He leaned down, dragging his hands through the water, checking to see if there was anything under the water. His hand hit something along the bottom, and he grabbed it tightly, pulling it up. It was a plastic cutout of a succubus, something from one of his ads, with a red piece of grimy fabric tangled around it . else he could have seen. 

“Wha- wait, no…”

He was so sure… He kept rummaging in the water, could he have seen something else? There was nothing there. Eventually he stood and just yelled into the storm.

“Baby?” He called into the rain. The wind carried his voice away fruitlessly, not that it could really be heard over the sound of the rain hitting the water. “Bambi? Al! Are you out here?” 

His eyes darted around, trying to catch a glimpse of red. His glasses were collecting water too fast to be any good, so he removed them, squinting through the rain.

“Alastor!”

He all but screamed it, desperate to be heard. Al was out here, he just knew it. Maybe hurt or in trouble… He was probably crying. You couldn’t tell. Water was pouring off him in rivlets, but he didn’t give a damn… Lightning flashed and he was blinded. He blinked frantically to clear it. He needed to see, needed to find him- 

Cold hands suddenly grabbed his shoulders and started pulling him back towards the studio. Val tried to pull away, trying to push forward. It must be Vox, come to drag him back inside. 

“Let me go! He’s out here! Alastor!”

The hands on his shoulder forcibly turned him around and whacked him on the chest, reprimanding. Valentino looked down, and instead of Vox, he saw glowing blue eyes and mouth against a black silhouette. It was Alastor’s shadow.

“Al… What... Where’s the rest of you? Is he around here? I can-”

The shadow growled at him silently, shaking it’s head and insistently pointed at the studio. Val’s lower left wrist was grabbed and he was towed back into the building. The shadow pulled him all the way to the elevator, all but pushing him inside.

“Alright, alright. I’m going.”

He was escorted via shadowy guard to the penthouse where Vox and Velvet watched them come in.

“What took you so lo- Holy fuck, you’re soaked!” Vox did a double take. “Did you go outside? You fucking dumbass!”

The shadow nodded along, although it looked somewhat loathe to agree with anything Vox said.

“I thought- I thought I saw…”

The adrenaline was fading from his system and Val was starting to shake. Cold and stress setting in. The shadow pawed at his hat and coat, trying to get the soaked garments off of him before disappearing into the bathroom and returning with towels. It wrapped a particularly fluffy pink one around Val’s shoulders.

“I thought I saw Alastor outside… He could still be out there- I…”

He was cut off by his phone ringing on the desk. The shadow perked up and excitedly bounded over to it, picking it up and presenting it to Valentino. It was an unknown number. Val didn’t mske a habit of answering those, but the shadow kept pointing and gesturing at it, so he picked up the call.

“Hello?”

“He- -lo m- dear!” Crackly and riddled with static, a familiar voice came over the phone. “So-ry -ate!”

“Alastor!”

Val felt his knees go slightly weak at the sound of his lover’s voice. Almost all of his anxiety left him in an exhausting rush. Alastor continued chattering on the other end of the line

“-ound a phone boo- -ropped my he- -water- -ot worki- My da- -ing- wha- -re -uo do- -g -t -ere?”

The words broke up like a radio with bad signal. Val checked his phone, but he had full bars. Any connection he made should be strong, even in this weather. Proximity to Vox should guarantee it.

“Babe, you’re breaking up, I can’t hear you.”

There was a strain on Val’s voice. He needed so badly to hear Alastor’s voice. He didn’t understand-

“My abil- -radio wav- -nterference- -oor sign- Cann- -eport safe-”

That only made Val’s stomach tighten. Was Al out there somewhere with malfunctioning powers?

“Al, Alastor, baby, please tell me you’re somewhere safe…”

“No- -orry! I’m qui- -mfortable. The res- -icious.”

The shadow let out a silent snicer and made a show of licking its lips. Valentino sighed in relief. He was okay. The shadow saw this and took his hand. The cold pressure was a comforting weight.

“-ill see yo- -orm blows over- -hadow wit- -ou. Stay ind- -y love. -ust g- -ater.”

Valentino didn’t know for certain what he had said, but given how the shadow was making itself comfortable curled up at his side, it seemed he had an additional companion until Alastor was able to come himself. Keeping the louse safely on the sofa and away from the storm outside. Valentino suddenly felt a bloom of warmth that vanished all the terror and chill of his stint outside.

Alastor was okay. He had sent his shadow to let him know.

He was safe.

“Okay... I love you. I’ll see you when the storm blows over.”

Valentino was reluctant to hang up, but he had no choice in the matter as it went to a dead tone. Presumably Alastor had hung up. The shadow curled around him in a cold and serpentine sort of hug. Pressing its forehead against Valentino’s and nuzzling into it. A silent comfort for both of them. Valentino remembered saying that he could feel, hear, and see everything his shadow could when it was like this. He reached up and cupped the shadow’s face.

“Be safe.” He said quietly.

The shadow nodded before it grinned at him and mischievously wriggled closer. Pressing up against him and sighing contentedly. Val smiled down at it fondly, finally daring to relax. He lay back against the couch and looked at Vox. 

“Still got that movie lined up?”

Vox looked like he was going to comment, but decided against it and looked towards the TV, the display coming to life unprompted. The shadow pressed into him a bit harder and Val wrapped a pair of arms around it.

He fell asleep halfway through the movie, but that was alright. He woke up with a blanket thrown over him and the shadow still content in his arms.


	2. Hell and High Waters - Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first chapter from Alastor's point of view. 
> 
> The storm hides all manner of howls. Alastor gets himself hurt, has a bloodbath, and does some introspection

Alastor truly hated being late. He was all set to leave the hotel in an orderly fashion, fifteen minutes before he needed to be at his appointment. It shouldn't take any longer than an hour, and he should be at Valentino’s house by six.

He pulled his pocket watch from his waistcoat and checked the time.

Quarter to five.

Perfect.

He left his room after bidding the ram skull by his door a fond farewell, jaunting down the halls towards the lobby. The storm outside made the chandeliers rattle. His shadow swirled at his heels, straying along the walls of the hotel, frightening the odd denzin or two by sneaking up behind them. He watched in amusement and hummed cheerfully, twirling his microphone as he pranced his way over to the bar counter where Charlie and Vaggie were sipping drinks and chatting happily.

  
“I must bid you adieu!” He announced with a wide grin and a buzz of static.”I have dinner plans!”

“Okay Al! Don’t get caught out in the rain!”

Ever naive, the dear, the princess gave him a big smile and waved. Her consort seemed much less accepting. Vaggie narrowed her eye before sighing, resigned to the fact that no matter what she said, Alastor wouldn’t listen to her and she would get spoken down to.

Alastor would give her this, she learned quickly.

“Just… Make sure it doesn’t get tied back to the hotel.”

“Oh, you are a riot, my dear!” Alastor’s grin stretched beyond what was friendly and laughed at her. In the background, his shadow dissolved into silent chortles. “I will be the epitome of discretion.”

Vaggie looked like she believed that about as much as she believed Angel Dust’s frequent proclamations of innocence and sobriety. Her frustration jostled another laugh out of the deer demon and he winked at her, just to make her fume.

Husk peeled his face from the bar to see what all the noise was about and they made brief eye contact. Half a century of knowing each other meant no words were necessary and they had a brief, silent conversation. The cat narrowed his eyes a little before closing them and settling back on the bar. No doubt he would pester Alastor for details later, but for now he was content to let him go. This was progress, and Alastor was glad his friend was coming around to the idea of him and Valentino. He hadn’t been happy when he had found out, and while Alastor could appreciate that it came from a place of concern, he didn’t like being treated like he couldn’t handle himself.

_ (“Are you serious? Alastor, you know how you are, and who he is! And what about your-” _

_ “Valentino is well aware of my… aversion. To sex. We have a compromise. He will force nothing,” _

_ “For now…” _

_  
_ _ “I don’t appreciate your tone, Husker.” _

_  
_ _ “You’re gonna get yourself hurt, and I don’t wanna have to deal with the carnage that comes after....”) _

“Don’t hurry back, asshole.” Husk grunted, and that was that.

Satisfied, Alastor straightened his lapels, fixed his hair, and winked out of existence. He teleported straight into the house of his guest star this afternoon. The house was well off, if a bit modern and minimalist for Alastor’s taste. White walls and cubic furniture. His victim of the night stood in the center of the room. A blue skinned lizard demon of some sort. The demon seemed to be expecting him, staring at him with a poker face betrayed by frightened green eyes. A fleshy tongue was peeking out from between braced teeth, showing signs of being nervously chewed on, wet and slightly bloodied. It made Alastor’s stomach gurgle in anticipation.

“Good evening, my good fellow!” Alastor tilted his head eerily, his ever present smile growing as menacing hunger lit up his eyes. “I have somewhere to be after this, so let’s make this fast. Shall we?”

“You don’t wanna do this.” The lizard demon said. His voice shook a little, but he wasn’t a stuttering mess yet. “You can just walk away now. I don’t want trouble.”

“You aren’t in a position to be making demands.” Alastor reminded him. “And you invited trouble when you tried to steal from royal property. I am truly your least painful concern right now.”

“I needed the money! Please…”

The lizard started backing away as Alastor stalked towards his prey, antlers growing and branching outwards, shadows lengthening with a low hiss. He does so enjoy begging, such fun when they realise it’s useless. Static buzzed around him and the room darkened, red sigels floating about his head. He would so love to broadcast this, the fear is delicious, but it does directly relate to the hotel and a gentleman's word is his bond.

“Now don’t hold back the screams, dear.” Alistor’s tinny voice warped, deepening and tuning into other stations. Bleeding in and out of cheering of a studio audience and the blood curdling screams of those who came before.

The lizard demon was white knuckled, hands gripping the desk that it was now backed up against. They looked sick and trembling. Alastorlicked his lips, saliva turning black and staining his lips. The Radio Demon was so preoccupied with his soon-to-be meal that he didn’t notice the demon hurriedly rifling through a drawer, eyes still locked on him. The wendigo was about to lunge when a small bottle was thrown into his face.

The fragile bottle smashed on impact and suddenly blinding pain seared across the left side of Alistor’s face. He staggered backwards, clutching at it, making his hands burn too. He could feel his skin melting away from the impact site, blisters and black blood welling up. Aliastor roared, static shifting and stations rapidly coming to a halt. His body shifting, changing, responding to pain and distress. His limbs lengthened, fur sprouting from his dead, grey skin. His jaw ached and his face contorted into a cervine’s skull with wicked teeth and skin falling away from his skull, exposing the newly shaped bone. The room was filled with heavy, hot breaths that stunk of graveyard dirt and rotting flesh. The lizard demon stared up at what had once been man shaped, now a hulking behemoth barely able to fit in the room.

A flash of lightning lit up the bastardization of a deer, long limbed and disproportionate. Dark red fur wet with inky blood. Long, yellow teeth glinted in the storm’s light and a low growl, almost a purr, harmonized with the thunder that followed. 

The Wendigo panted through the pain the holy water caused. Lessened now that the Other Self had retreated. The Wendigo was not Damned. It was Other. Beyond the heavenly division. Old magics of earth and death, curses and monsters older than time.

The beast sniffed and smelled blood of Self. It’s long tongue snaked out and dragged along the puddle on the ground, bringing it up and letting up fall down their throat. It also smelled blood of Prey. Red eyes, like radio dialled floating in a black abyss, locked on the quivering demon below it and that was that. Prey did not even have time to gather it’s wits before the Wendigo was swallowing it. The Wendigo barely chewed. A few bites to break the Prey into manageable pieces before it was swallowed.

Thunder rumbled outside as the beast niffered for more Food. A great and ceaseless Hunger, like a void, needed tending. Other Self ignored it for the most part. Ceasing indulgence for the Entertainment. The Wendigo did not understand. There was only the Hunger. Only the search for Prey. Only the Hunt and the Kill.

It searched for more, ripping into the cold machine in which there was stored food. Already dead, but not intolerable. It joined the Prey in The Wendigo’s belly. It was not enough. The Wendigo clawed its way out, smashing the window, and howling into the rain. It needed more. More food. More Prey. There was light in the windows of a house nearby. 

The Wendigo.bounded out towards it. It could smell Flesh. Hear the beating of hearts. The Wendigo was Hungry. It tore through house after house, body after body. Rain slicking it’s fur, dripping down the rivlets of it’s exposed skull. Scooping up any soul unfortunate enough to be out in the rising floodwaters.

The Wendigo ate and ate until it could smell no more Prey. Hear no more Prey. Only the might of the storm raging around them. It yawned, saliva and blood dripping from it’s jaws. They still hungered, but there was no more food here. The storm was soothing, like the Chaos. Like home.

The Wendigo pulled themself up to an alcove on a roof nearby. The tile groaned under its weight, but it held. It flopped down and laid it’s head under the cover of the roof’s overhang. They let out a crooning groan and the dials in their eyes winked out. A long huff of breath, and the beast relaxed. Slipping away into sleep.

~~~

Alistor woke up in the rain.

He sat up like a jackknife, slapped on his grin full force, and looked around him, spinning his head 180 degrees, eyes glowing menacingly. He didn’t remember how he got here. He remembered The Wendigo roaring and then… nothing.

There was nobody around. He was alone on a roof as the rain continued to pour. Below him the streets of hell had turned to canals, the water levels rising still. He took a breath, only slightly shaky, and hissed at the burning on the side of his face.

He sneered at the pain, ignoring how it aggravated when he moved his mouth. He lifted his hand to it and could feel blisters and burned skin through his gloves, marring the skin. It wouldn’t scar his demonic form, hopefully, but he doubted it was very pretty. One of his eyes was squeezed shut instinctively, and his left cheek burned. Thankfully, none of it seemed to have gotten in his mouth, but the damage was far from insubstantial. He gave a shaky sigh and flicked his ear. From the sounds of it, it was still raining outside. Fresh, safe, non-holy water had helped wash out the wounds. But he couldn’t stay here. This area was in his territory, but just barely. More one of those liminal spaces on the outskirts, always crawling with demi lords who would happily take advantage of this.

He prepared to teleport, but did a double take as he gathered his magic. Where he had full reserves this morning, his magic was a pitiful pool, almost empty. The holy water had sapped his strength. Startled, he stopped, and took a breath, forcing his grin wider to stop a flinch. Static roared in his ears, stations shifting quickly into a cacophony of noise. 

Oh dear.

Exhaustion tugged on his bones, and he hadn't even made a jump yet. The water had eaten his energy away to bare bones, tearing away at his demonic energy and weakening him. Something in his chest constricted. He might be in more trouble than he anticipated.

Gathering his magic again, he knew he had to make this count. One jump. That’s all he had the power for.

For a fleeting moment, he considered warping to Valentino’s penthouse. Teleporting to his boyfriend’s arms and hiding from the pain of his injuries in that fluffy collar. Surrounded by sturdy arms and the thick fabric of that coat.

But it was only for a moment. He needed the safety of his own home to deal with this. As much as he loved Valentino, they weren’t there yet. Alisto wasn’t prepared to let himself be seen in such a vulnerable state. Besides, even if he felt comfortable with Valentono seeing him like this, Vox and Velvet would undoubtedly be there too. Those two, he couldn’t afford to show weakness to.

So instead he shot for his radio tower. Between the hotel, Valentino, and his broadcasts, he hadn’t spent a great deal of time here recently, but it was always here. Few dared stray close to his territory. He was not a controlling overlord, but random acts of massacre on nothing but a whim tended to ward away permanent residents.

In an overpopulated Hell, it was a high symbol of respect, of fear, and Alistor revelled in it.

He landed and almost collapsed to his knees. His shadow caught him with a silent chitter. He stumbled a little, but steadied himself and began making his way across the room. He let the familiarity of it set him at ease. Outside the windows, instead of the storm he could hear pounding on the roof, the bayou creaked and croaked with bog wildlife. Gloomy light filtering through the mangrove trees. The floorboards creaked below him and the radio on the table responded to his presence with a crackle. His magic was seeped in every inch of this place, voodoo artifacts and elements in organized chaos. Furniture and books from his own era made up an atmosphere that felt like home, both to him, and his other half. Hundreds of empty eye sockets stared at him as the numerous skulls and skeletons on the walls all seemed to stare at him. Unsettling to the average visitor, But Alistor could feel the protection in them.

“Tha- -ou, de-”

Alistor felt his voice fade in and out, like a poorly tuned radio. The words mostly obscured by static. A symptom of his severe magical exhaustion. 

The shadow released him and he made his way over to the mirror he had hanging in the hall. He looked at his face and winced at the inflamed blisters. Oh dear. He touched them tenderly. That would take some time to heal. As far as holy wounds went, he could do worse, but he didn’t care much for the branding. His grin stretched. The skin ruptured and filled one of the blisters with blood. 

His shadow curled up behind him and tapped on his shoulder. It held up a hand, first two fingers held up in a V shape, before changing it to thumb, first, and fourth fingers lifted. Their name-sign for Valentino.

“We can’t -ow hi-.” Alastor insisted. They couldn’t let Valentino see him like this. Show him a side that was weak, that had been hurt. The burn, like his scars, were ugly, and Valentino was surrounded by Hell’s most beautiful… No. Certainly couldn’t show him this.

The shadow huffed and held it’s thumb and pinky up to its ear.

_ Call him _

Oh.

Alastor searched his pockets. He didn’t understand the value of these hellphones the youth seemed to like so much, but Valentino had bought him one after one of their dates.  _ ‘So you can call me.’ _ he’d said. He rarely used it, but he saw Val smile when he did, so he kept it around. Even if the touching-screen and all the applications still confused him.

He frowned when he brought it out. The pink case, Valentino’s colours, was all that was holding together the cracked mess of soaking electronics.

Whoops. Seems The Wendigo claimed more than just undead victims tonight.

His shadow sighed at him, exasperated. Alistor huffed and stumbled to the sittee, sitting with.... Less elegance than he would have liked. He had a house telephone mounted to the wall in the parlor, but he knew Valentino wouldn’t answer a number he didn’t recognise. He had ranted to Alastor on many an occasion about the scammers and schemers that tried to call him.

“Pe-aps yo- -uld go fi- -ut.”

The shadow brightened before hesitating, glancing back at him. Bloody, overprotective thing. 

“I wil- -e fin-”

The shadow narrowed its eyes and something in the air shifted as it became more… real. Solid. Alastor’s vision did a strange shift as he suddenly started receiving sensory information from two angles. The shadow’s way of literally keeping an eye on him.

He felt a swell of affection, but squashed it under impertinence. He sent through their newly forged connection:

_ Fine, now go. _

He could feel the shadow’s amusement as it vanished into the night.

~~~

Alastor followed the entire debacle in the storm, heart in his throat. He could see through the shadow’s eyes that Valentino was trembling in the rain. Calling for him. Trying to press further into the storm. He hauled himself to his feet and hurried to the house phone, waiting for the shadow to get Valentino dry and warm.

As soon as Valentino’s sodden coat and hat were off of him, he quickly dialled the number. His shadow encouraged his lover to pick it up and finally, Alastor was able to talk to Val.

Sort of.

His voice was still experiencing interference. After this he would need to sleep, and eat one of the carcasses he had stored away to regain some energy. He knew he was difficult to understand like this, but he did his best. Alastor found himself very grateful that Valentino asked if he was somewhere safe and not if he was hurt. He did hate lying to his amour, but telling him he had a holy burn would have cause no small amount of stress. He might even try to travel across the city to get to him.

He would not have Valentino back in that rain.

Eventually he hung up, content to let his shadow take care of Valentino and calm him down. It was an extension of himself, given a life of its own, he trusted it

He felt the phantom of Valentino’s hand on his non injured cheek, gentle and warm.

_ “Be safe.” _

His prema-grin softened into something genuine. He leaned into the hand that wasn’t there and turned his mouth into it. A touch that, on a normal day would be unwelcome, was much appreciated in light of the day.

Hopefully he could rest here until the burns faded. No need to cause his friends concern, or give his enemies ideas. 

He made his way to his bedroom and quickly donned his pajamas.Slipping under the covers, he could feel Val’s body heat through his shadow, the pressure of his arms around him. He let his eyes slip shut.

And he slept.


	3. Water Damage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor has failed to keep in touch and Val is worried. A story of aftermath and the final part of the first plotline.

“Here’s a quote for the repairs…”

The imp handed Val a clipboard with some hastily scribbled calculations on it and the pimp groaned, running a clawed hand down his face. The sheer amount of zeros on that number made his head ache. The flood damage had been extensive. It might not have been so bad if Val hadn’t thrown the doors open and left them that way for the whole time he was outside. The tile was damaged as the raging waters had dragged debris inside, cracking them and getting into the sealant. The computers were, of course, unsalvageable, and any paper records on the first floor were goners too. 

The fact that he had to foot the bill the next in a long line of irritations.

He ripped the paper off the clipboard and stuffed it into his coat pocket.

“If I find even a single thing wrong with the repairs….” 

He growled, letting his voice taper off and the imp’s imagination do the work for him. The worker swallowed dryly and nodded. 

“O- Of course sir, it’ll be as good as new,”

“It’d better be.”

He turned back to the elevator and left them to their work. He needed something to get rid of this headache. As the elevator climbed the building, he glanced back at his phone.

No new messages from Alastor.

He made a face and pocketed it again, he would have thought that his love would have contacted him again since that night. His shadow was still around, so he knew he was alive and well, but there had been no texts and no calls since that first one. It made Val uneasy. 

He knew that Alastor was far from the most modern of folks. Humans weren’t really programmed for too much change, and most non-hellborns struggled with the ever evolving tech scene. He’d had to buy him a hellphone, teach him to text, and he was still baffled by the concept of a touchscreen (or in fact a phone that didn’t need a wire in the first place). He frequently forgot to charge the damn thing, and never texted or called unprompted, preferring to teleport in and give Val a heart attack. Expecting Alastor to get in contact was expecting pigs to fly, and yet…

He couldn’t help but be concerned. The storm had let up over twenty-four hours ago and he hadn’t heard a thing. There had been no cheeky visits to his office, no figure hiding in the shadows to jump out and scare him, nothing.

Alastor was  _ fine, _ and he  _ knew that _ but he couldn’t help but wonder…Why wasn’t he here?

He didn’t expect him to stay, but a drop in would have been nice, to soothe the anxieties.

The elevator dinged as he made it to the penthouse and he stepped out and flopped onto his sofa. Alastor’s shadow swirled around him, rubbing against him like an affectionate cat. It wasn’t solid at the moment, but the movement was appreciated all the same.

“Where is he, huh? I feel like I’m getting the cold shoulder…” He told it, knowing Alastor couldn’t hear him. He didn’t want to pressure Al into anything. If he needed space, he needed space. It would just have been nice to get a heads up. “I hope he’s okay.”

The shadow looked at him, glowing blue features pensive, before making a dive for his hand. It passed through, but that combined with the beckoning motion it was making made it’s intentions clear.

“Follow you? Wait, why? Is he in trouble?”

The shadow hesitated before shaking its head, but kept beckoning anyway. Val hesitated only for a moment before following. Back into the elevator and down to ground level. He followed the specter through the winding streets of hell. He sometimes lost it in the maze of shadow and alleys of Pentagram, but never for long, returning to him to swirl around his feet and continuing to herd him.

After a little while of walking, Val realized where the shadow was taking him. The reason the surroundings were getting less and less familiar despite still being in his territory.

Val couldn’t help but wonder what the game was. His ASL wasn’t good enough to communicate with the shadow properly, he was working on it but progress was slow going. The shadow had definitely… paused, when he had asked if Alastor was okay, but wouldn’t lie to him the way the deer demon would. The shadow was an extension of Alastor and could not, in theory, want things that Alastor didn’t want. But the shadow also lacked things like restraint and boundaries, meaning it would often push past boundaries Alastor wasn’t ready to start taking down yet.

“Are you sure this is okay? He’s never brought me here before…” He asked the shadow as the two of them officially entered Radio Demon territory, marked by a sudden decrease in population and modern technology. 

Alastor tended to attract those who were likeminded, and eat those who weren’t. Not to mention that being an overlord in direct competition to Vox made cell phones dangerous, a habit Alastor was fast to make and hesitant to break, much to Val’s dismay.

It was quiet here, although Alastor’s territory tended to be. Alastor’s frequent feeding frenzies curbed the population a lot, and his reputation dissuaded the more cautious from venturing in. But there were always those who thought they would be alright, or those who didn’t mind the danger. Perhaps they were driven out by the storm?

The shadow chattered at him silently and continued to lead, taking him up towards the center of the territory where the radio tower stood tall and proud above the city lines. As he approached, Val could see a house that looked like it came straight from the bayou. Stilted above the ground, the cabin was done up in rich oak with red and blac accents because of course. Alastor had to stick to the theme, the dramatic goof.

As they got nearer, the shadow stuck close to him, leading him more carefully. The louse quickly realized this was because the ground was alive with movement he hadn’t even noticed. Although the floor looked like simple dirt at first glance, it rippled like quicksand on it’s own, telling of something lurking just beneath. He swallowed and was more careful about where he stepped.

They eventually made it up the stairs and to the door of the cabin. The wood creaked under Val’s weight.

“I hope that it’s bigger on the inside…” 

Val muttered, looking at the roof and how it was only a smidge higher than his antennae. He wouldn’t even be able to wear his hat inside if it weren’t. The shadow just grinned and slipped under the door, leaving it to be a surprise for Val when he opened it.

“Jerk.” The louse muttered fondly before knocking on the door. “Al, baby, are you in there?”

As soon as his fist touched the door, the shadows came alive. Even Val’s own shadow under him turned to a swarm of tentacles and curled around his feet. Valentino forced himself to relax. This was Al’s home and it was going to have security measures, their presence didn’t mean he was unwelcome.

The door opened a little and a red eye could be seen on the other side, glowing with a menacing light. If it were anyone else, you might have thought Alastor was hiding behind the door, but as it was, the effect was bone-chilling. Like he was being examined, eyed up for the meat hook. Or the pot.

“Who da- Valentino?”

It narrowed when it saw him. Val gave Alastor his most charming smile.

“Hey, babe. Thought I’d drop in to see ya. You know, cause you haven’t been by.”

The shadows released him, but the door remained near shut. Not opening to welcome him in. Val reached out to open it more and see Al properly, but the door didn’t budge. Gloved hands wrapped around the edge of the door tightly, keeping it where it was and acting as a barrier between them.

“I don’t want company today, Valentino.” Alastor said curtly, turning away from the door. “I’ll find you when I do. I would ask you to stay out of my space.”

Ouch. Val held back a wince. That stung, but it also made something stirr in his gut and his brow furrow. Something about it was… off. That’s the sort of treatment that he would have expected from Alastor when they first started dating, but not now. Alastor had been getting a lot better at being accommodating to Valentino’s feelings and explaining why he was acting the way he was. The dismissal  _ was  _ harsh, but… suspiciously so. 

The door suddenly seemed more obstructive and Val tugged on it harder.

“Hey babe, you know I’ll respect your space. But I’m worried. You said you would contact me after the storm, and now you’re hiding from me. If you really want me to go, then I’ll go, but I’m just… I want to know you’re okay.”

“I’m  _ fine.” _ The word came out in a pop of static and Val was entirely unconvinced. “I don’t need you hovering over me. How did you even get her- Oh you little traitor.”

Alastor’s shadow had evidently decided to put its two cents in because Alastor turned away to address an unseen person.

“I told you, we don’t need him seeing this! It’ll be fine after a few weeks.”

Now that was ominous. Suspicion turned to nerves as Alastor berated his shadow. They didn’t need him seeing what? Was he in trouble? What sort of situation got  _ Alastor  _ in trouble?

“What will be fine?” He got no answer and it did nothing to soothe his nerves. “Al? Love? Please talk to me.”

“Nothing, Valentino. Just go.”

“No, Alastor, I thought we were past this. Don't keep things from me, love, not if they’re important.”

“It’s  _ not _ important.”

“I don’t believe you.” He moved his upper pair of hands to touch where Alastor’s fingers were in a whiteknuckle grip around the door’s edge. He took Alastor’s hand in his and frowned at the strange texture through the gloves. There was a hiss and the deer demon pulled his hand away. “Al? What’s going on?”

Alastor made a strange crackling noise and pulled away, closing the door behind him. Valentino pounded on the door.it, gritting his teeth. No way was he letting Alastor run away from this. He was a centurion and a literal goddamned adult and Valentino would force him to communicate if it was the last thing he did.

“Alastor! Don’t you run away from me!”

The door opened suddenly and Val almost fell through the door frame. He looked around in alarm and saw Alastor’s shadow hovering by the latch. The shadow pointed at a specific door and darted away. Val followed the silent instruction and found himself in a room with an armchair facing away from the door.

“This is not ‘respecting my space’, as you put it, my dearest Valentino.” Alastor’s voice had a distinct edge to it. The shadow had apperated at Alastor’s side and was pawing at him, trying to get him to turn and face Val, but Alastor shook his head. “One would think you’re looking to test my patience.”

Val stepped closer anyway.

“Something’s wrong, I can see that, why is it so foregn an idea to you that I want to  _ help?  _ Even if that’s just being there for you.”

Alastor growled and stood, whirling around with his finger in the air, clearly ready to deliver some scathing remark; but the minute he turned, the louse froze.

“I’ll have you know-”

“Al, what happened to your  _ face?” _

Alastor’s mouth shut with an audible snap.

The left side of the radio demon’s face was a mess of burns and blisters, his eye almost swollen shut with them. Red and painful, black blood giving the illusion of charring. 

It was horrific.

Val made an aborted sound and took a few steps forward, all four hands reaching out. Looking to hold, to comfort, to heal, even if he had no idea how. Alastor flinched away under the illusion of straightening his back, forcing his signature grin wider. A front. A mask.

“Not the prettiest of sights, is it? I’m afraid I ran afoul of a bit of holy water, but no matter! I rather like the burn, now it’s not eating at me. Ha!” Alastor laughed a little at his own joke before giving Val a cheery look. “So you needn’t worry about my looks being marred for long.”

Val could see right through this bullshit, but for the life of him didn’t understand the issue.

“Your loo- Babe, I don’t care about your  _ looks _ , I care about that you got  _ hurt!  _ Holy water? How did this happen! Does it still hurt? What-”

He broke off, overwhelmed with emotion. Alastor’s grin wavered a little, shrinking a tooth or two. Val took a breath and reached out with his upper hand. Trying to be as gentle as possible. Alastor reached up and encircled his hand around his wrist. Valentino could feel that strange texture from earlier and used his lower hands to hold the hand still so he could get a better look. Alastor’s hand matched his face, burned and painful looking. He looked up at Alastor, eyes pleading.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want you going back out in the rain.” Alastor admitted. “And I…” Alastor mumbled something that Val couldn’t quite make out.

“What?”

“I was… worried you would find me ugly like this.” Alastor ground out. “You have… many beautiful people at our disposal.”

Valentino made a strangled noise.

“Al… no. Never. You could never be ugly to me.” 

He leaned forward slowly and planted a kiss on the right side of his face, careful of the burn. He gave Alastor a lot of time to get away from the movement if he wanted to, but the other demon didn’t pull away. Val brushed a few strands of Alastor’s hair away from the wound and sighed.

“It makes me upset because you were hurt and alone, but never think that you’re ugly to me.”

Alastor leaned into his hands a little and allowed himself to be enveloped into a hug. Val breathed in the scent of his love and let himself be at ease. The deer demon wouldn’t like to be fussed over about the wound, all he had to do was be supportive.

“I can stay here, if you don’t want to go out like this…”

Val offered, but Alastor shook his head.

“No. You need to be in your studio, you should go soon. But I will call. And perhaps drop in if nobody is around.”

“My office is always a private space, baby, you know that.”

Alastor’s grin became very soft and genuine in that moment.

“Well then, I will drop by. But for now… perhaps stay with me, just for a little while?”

Val smiled in return.

“As long as you want.”


	4. Different Languages

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone likes sex, right?
> 
> When Val finds out that he isn't going to be able to get inside Alastor the way he's familair with, he realises he needs to get creative.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My google history as I'm trying to write this chapter: 'Why do people like sex?', 'why do people have sex?', 'How does having sex with someone you love differ from having sex with someone you don't?'. This one was a challenge folks.
> 
> No smut in this chapter (no smut at all in this story as far as I know), despite what the summary and beginning of the chapter might imply. I am but a humble ace trying to get these silly idiots to communicate. 
> 
> Also, I headcanon Val as hellborn. An embodiment of lust, and actually a bigger dear than he seems in terms of Hell's hierachy.

Valentino was prepared to ask a big question.

Not  _ the _ big question, although he would be lying if he said his chest didn’t do something funny at the thought.

Tonight he was going to ask Alastor if he would have sex with him.

He and Alastor had been going steady for almost three years now and nothing had happened yet. Alastor had been slow to warm to contact that he wasn’t in total control of, but they’d got there. He accepted hugs and kisses, provided he had enough warning to refuse if he wished. He would allow cuddling during movie nights and would even sit on Val’s lap on occasion. But the thing that had gathered Val’s courage today was the fact that Alastor had now slept in the same bed as him the whole night through. Multiple times, even! 

Through the course of their relationship, his love hadn’t mentioned anything about sex and Val hadn’t asked. He didn’t want to push too hard or too fast. Alastor was in unfamiliar territory as it was, and Val was still scared that unexpected turbulence might just spook the deer away for good. Whenever it came up in conversation, Alastor was very quick to call it vulgar and change the subject and Val suspected it was disguised flusteredness. 

The concept made him grin, always-composed Alastor being a bashful mess at the thought of bedroom activities was cute.It wouldn’t surprise him, honestly. Alastor was an old fashioned man with old fashioned tastes and old fashioned values; sex wasn’t talked about openly in the human world, especially back then. But this was Hell and the rules were different here. 

Valentino was a generous lover. He prided himself on the fact that any and everyone who slept with him was more than satisfied. He was a dealer of lust, had honed his skills over millennia, and was more than experienced enough to rock anyone’s world. No matter how tame their tastes or wild their kinks. Valentino was born and raised in the embrace of hellfire and carnal sins. Sex was his first language, and he had a silver tounge.

And tonight, he was going to use that tongue, as well as anything else requested or needed, to give Alastor the night of his afterlife.

Every person was different, and Val had no doubt Alastor would be perfect for him, but he had no idea what to expect. What would it feel like? To hear his name on Alastor’s lips and see what that dead, grey skin looked like in post coital glow. Red hair mussed and out of place, eyes wild. Would it be wild and vicious like his kills? Precise and skilled like his cooking? Or would he see a side of Alastor that was entirely new? Either way, he couldn’t wait to find out, but this wasn’t about him. It was about Alastor. He wanted to give Alastor something he knew he could give. He wanted to touch Alastor in the ways that would make him feel good. He wanted to know his lover inside and out, teasing out the pleasure just waiting to be uncovered. Whisk him up in a moment of passion and break the entirety of hell down to just the two of them. 

Or at least, that was the plan.

Alastor would be in the hotel tonight, so that’s where the louse headed. Making his way on foot so he could rehearse in his head. He had already called and said he would be dropping in. Nerves ground in his gut, but he was, above all, excited. He knew he was getting ahead of himself, theorizing, fantasizing, but he couldn’t help it. Would Alastor take his cannibalistic tendencies to the bedroom? Bloodplay? Serial killer roleplay? He certainly had the  _ teeth _ for a biting kink… Even if Alastor said no tonight, he had sex on the mind and who better to think about than his devious little doe? One day, even if it wasn’t today, he would know Alastor in that context. And it would be glorious.

Husk was at the bar when he walked in and orange eyes looked up at him.

“There you are.” The cat groaned with an air of sufferance. “I’ve been waiting for ages.”

“Looking for me? What for?”

“Al said you were coming round, and he roped me into showing you the way.”

Val raised an eyebrow, looking around the hotel lobby. 

“A room number should be fine. I can count, you know.”

“Don’t sass me, or I’ll leave ya to get lost looking for Al’s room on your own. You can’t access Al’s room through the normal halls.”

Now that he thought about it, whenever he had been in Alastor’s room at the hotel, the radio demon had always teleported them in. Whenever he had left the room, the layout of the hall beyond had always been different, and never seemed to have other doors in it. The shadows too deep, the lights too dim...

Okay, maybe the cat had a point.

“Lead the way.”

~~~

They walked in silence. Husk was… well, he was a bit of a grump. He was Alastor’s friend, as much as he vehemently denied it, but he did  _ not _ have Alastor’s people skills. From what Val gathered, he didn’t want them either. The cat was content to keep to himself, and that was perfectly acceptable in hell, as long as you were willing to take the banes with the boons.

“You know, I’m real fuckin’ surprised you and Al make it work.” 

Husk suddenly spoke up, unprompted.

“And why is that?”

“Because who would have thought the guy who blew chunks the first time a girl came onto him would end up dating a pimp?” Husk rolled his eyes. “Don’t get me wrong, nothing about the damn kid makes any damn sense, but that’s always been the one consistant. Never wanted or needed a fuck in his life. The guy’s even immune to concubi. You have a reputation, and it ain’t about your sparkling personality. I just can’t imagine you of all people being able to go without having sex. ”

Valentino frowned and Husk narrowed his eyes dangerously.

“Unless… You ain’t fuckin’ someone on the side, are you? Because if you’re cheating on him...”

Val’s eyes widened as he realised how his facial expression had been interpreted. He held up all four hands in a placating gesture.

“No! No, I would never!”

The cat was still glaring at him with suspicion, but with a flick of his tail, the cat turned away.

“Yeah, well... I know I probably don’t stand much of a chance against a bigwig like you, but that doesn’t mean I won’t give it my best go to drag your STD ridden ass through the mud if you go fucking around with him.” Valentino was so caught up in the novelty of being threatened by a common sinner and reeling from the accusation of cheating on Alastor that the first half of what the cat said didn’t catch up until Husk was jabbing a claw at a dark red door with antlers framing a number plate that didn’t have a number on it. Just a capital A.

“Here. Turn the knob left, not right, unless you wanna end up in the swamps. He doesn’t feed Sally and Ally till later, so you don’t wanna be there.”

Valentino blinked and Husk was gone, leaving him in front of the door with a reeling head.

Wait,  _ what? _

The conversation was catching up with a rush and it was a lot to process. Blew chunks… Never needed a fuck… Who the  _ hell _ was immune to  _ concubi?  _ He could feel his plans crashing down around him. Was this true? 

Val knew, vaugely, that there were people who didn’t do sex, but he had never met one. They tended to stay far, far away from his home in the lust circuit. Most sinners were down for a good time, so he never really gave a thought to the fact that for some people, it wasn’t an option…

He stood outside the door, frozen.

If that was true, he couldn’t ask. Not tonight, not any night. It would drive Alastor away, for sure. Husk said a girl’s attention had made Alastor vomit. Alastor  _ hated _ vomit. There had been a scene in one of their movies where someone had hurled and Alastor had  _ left the room- _

His thoughts were interrupted by the door opening and Alastor was on the other side and smiling widely at him and great satan, he needed to think fast…

“My dear, you’re here! Come in, come in!. I trust Husker was helpful?” Valentino nodded numbly and allowed himself to be ushered inside. “I just had some last minute work to do, but I got it all squared away, so I’m all yours!”

He couldn’t lose this.

“So what is this about? You sounded mighty eager over the telephone!”

He needed an excuse...

“What, I can’t be excited to see you?”

“Well, you can, but you said you wanted to ask me about something.”

Val took a moment, a very brief one, to collect himself. He was a creature of sin and hellfire. He could do this.

“Well… The truth is, I was really craving that jumbo-liar you made the first time I came over. I was wondering if you would make it for me?”

Alastor blinked, seemingly taken off guard. Val prayed he didn’t see through the lie.

“Jambalaya? I… don’t see why you couldn’t have asked over the phone… But of course! You know I love cooking for you.”

Alastor composed himself in a matter of milliseconds and darted off in the direction of the kitchen, Val following behind. Alastor was clattering around, finding ingredients, and sharpening knives. The pimp watched him work in a flurry of kitchenware and food. Val knew he had gotten away with the lie. They chatted as Alastor worked and Val watched with an aching longing.

Just to test the waters, he mentioned the shoot that he had done today. It was pretty vanilla stuff, but the lead had blown such a big load the actress had almost choked. It had been funny on set, but he watched Alastor pause in his movements, making a face that he was quick to turn away and hide before particularly viciously brought his knife down on a piece of celery. 

“I would ask you to keep such topics out of my kitchen.”

Alastor asked and Val nodded. He had caught that brief glimpse of Alastor’s face before he turned away and he looked positively ill. Husk had been right. Talking about someone  _ else _ having sex had made Alastor almost loose his lunch. He had looked far more lovingly at the meat he was preparing than Val at that moment.

It was a revelation, and a hard one.

Alastor wasn’t flustered, he was disgusted. 

Valentino’s profession, his skills… To Alastor, it was disgusting.

Alastor went back to work and the talking returned to normal, but Val felt like his world had been turned on its head.

Alastor looked happy in the kitchen, as in his element in here as he was breaking down a body. 

He was having fun.

Alastor would, apparently, not have such fun in the bedroom with him. Alastor’s joy existed in other places. He had, instead of libado, an acute sense of schadenfreude. Found deep seated enjoyment in the terror and suffering of others rather than mutual hedonistic pleasure.

Alastor enjoyed things differently, and while that was okay, Val couldn’t help but feel a current of grief for the connection he would never be able to make with Alastor on a primal level. The moans and gasps he’d never hear. The moment he could push Alastor to the brink of pleasure to the point that the universe stopped spinning.

It would never happen.

He would take Alastor without sex (and he would because he couldn’t imagine a life without him at this point, sex or no), but he mourned the things that Valentino would never be able to give him.

~~~

The jambalaya was exquisite, but Val couldn’t shake the bitter taste of disappointment underneath it all.

~~~

“You’re moping.”

“I am not.”

“You kinda are, Val.”

“Shut up.”

“What? Bambi lock you out of the bedroom or something?”

The phrasing made Val sigh and lean back in his desk chair.

“Or something.”

Vox narrowed his eyes and Velvet looked up from her phone. Both of them were looking at him suspiciously. Val put a pair of hands up defensively.

“What?”

“Do we need to get involved?”

“If that psychotic piece of shit hurt you-”

“Wha- No! Al didn’t hurt me. I just…” He sighed and leaned forward, cradling his head in his top pair of hands while the other slumped across the desk. “I found out that he doesn’t want to fuck me, and I don’t know what to do about it. I feel like I can’t give him a part of me. He cooks for me and tells me about his life and how he died. Details that I can’t match because my life and body is kinda an open book. I want to show him a good time, something special, and we ain’t clicking right.”

Velvet cocked her head a little and Vox looked puzzled.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t think Al will have sex with me. He seems… revolted by the idea.”

“Why? There’s nothing wrong with you, and you sure as fuck know what you’re doing.”

“I don’t know. But when I talk about sex he looks like he’s going to hurl, or faint, or run away. Or all three.”

Vox made a puzzled face.

“Even the vanilla stuff? That’s weird. I know he’s a prude, but-”

“Oh my god, you’re both so old fashioned. Here.”

Vox grumbled something about how she was one to talk, Velvet being older than the TV demon by several centuries. He was cut off when she shoved her phone underneath their noses (or metaphorical noses). On the screen was a google search dotted with little flags in purple, grey, white, and black.

“Asexual?” Val read from the entries. “What does that mean?”

“Long story short, your doe doesn’t want to do the dirty with you, or anyone else. Some asexual people will do it anyway for various reasons, but from what you’ve said, Alastor isn’t one of those.”

Huh. Val wondered if Alastor knew about this. Probably not. Val knew a thing or two about the various sexualities that humans and demons stepped into, although this was a new one, and he knew Alastor wasn’t particularly familiar with those.

“Okay… So what do I do about it?”

Val was well aware that you couldn’t change someone like that. If Alastor didn’t want to have sex, he sure as hell wasn’t going to force it, but that didn’t solve his problem that he felt like he wasn’t contributing anything intimate to their relationship

“Maybe this is a good thing,” Vox mused, scrolling on his own phone now. “Blitzen would probably end up biting your dick off anyway. Eaten our head like a praying mantis or some shit.”

Val winced, before inspiration hit him. His eyes widened.

He had an idea.

~~~

Alastor liked to nibble. There were times when they were cuddling and Val would suddenly feel razor sharp teeth digging into whatever happened to be closest to Alastor’s mouth. A bite and then licking, sucking, and gnawing at the wound. Alastor would lap up the blood, content as anything. 

It had been disturbing as shit the first few times, and Val had been slightly concerned that Al was sampling the goods for a later date, but after a few prodding questions Alastor had revealed that his blood smelled good. That was weird, but so was Al, and it didn’t go any further than a few deep bite marks, so he didn’t mind all that much. The wounds healed quickly. It wasn’t a problem.

But now it was an inspiration.

Val called up his best plastic surgeon and started researching butchering techniques. Alastor favored his wrists and shoulder for blood, but there wasn’t much meat there. There would be some flavorful meat on the thigh, maybe…

The doctor read over the request with increasing worry in the slope of his brow.

“What the hell are you planning?”

The shrike demons asked him.

“None of your business. Can you do it or not?”

“I mean, yes… But-”

“Good. Be ready for tomorrow, five pm, it needs to be fresh.”

~~~

Alastor teleported into Valentino’s penthouse with no shortage of trepidation. The phone call that asked him to come today had been even odder than the one earlier in the week. The louse had sounded nervous, but excited.

_ “Dinner’s on me this time. Come for about seven?” _

Alastor hadn’t one single idea what this was about. His lover had been acting very oddly this past week and Alastor was hoping for answers with his dinner. He arrived in the living area, and it was empty. Odd. Val had said that dinner was on him, but he wouldn't be cooking. The pimp had emphatically told Alastor in the past that he could burn water, and it was early to be in bed…

“Al? That you babe? I’m in the dining room.”

Well then…

He made his way in and froze in the door.

For a man who couldn’t cook and lived alone, Valentino had a rather impressive dining room table. ‘All the better to tie people to.’, the pimp had told him. But there was no one tied to it at the moment.

It was covered with a black tablecloth. A few candles artfully decorated it with two places set. Val sat on one end, a steak, potatoes, and beans laid out on his plate.

The other place had a large plate piled high with bloody, raw meat.

It smelled delectable.

It also smelled very familiar.

“Hey Al. Right on time.”

Valentino smiled at him with his most charming of smiles. Alastor was not impressed. His grin stretched wider in defence, nose working to figure out what he was looking at.

“What is this?”

Alastor gave his love a firm glare, scanning him for injury. Valentino shifted under the scrutiny, the confidence and charm he had started with beginning to melt away.

“Uh, dinner. What does it look like?”

“It  _ looks like _ you’re feeding me a plate of your own flesh. Would you mind explaining to me how it came about separating itself from your person?”

Valentino gave him an unreadable look and then looked down at himself.

“I-”

“-Because if this is your way of telling me that you got into a fight and got hurt, we will be having words. After I rend the party responsible limb from limb.”

He stopped when he saw that Valentino looked uncomfortable and realised that he should probably let the pimp speak.

“I… I wanted to do something for you. Something… intimate. And you weren’t going to- I know you don’t want to have sex. That’s fine. I don’t care. But I want you to… enjoy me. Somehow. This was all I could think of-”

Alastor found himself locked in place. Processing the words coming out of Valentino’s mouth. They were beginning to pick up speed as his love actually began to  _ ramble. _ That was Alastor’s territory in this relationship, and he knew it was a sign that he should start reassuring Val that he hadn’t done anything wrong, but he was still stalling on the concept that when Valentino had found out that Alastor didn’t want to engage in sexual activities, the first thing he did was  _ cut himself open and lay himself out on Alastor’s plate. _

“-nd I know I should have told you but I wanted it to be a surprise and Husk said you would be sick if I-”

“Valentino.”

The one word cut through the words like a hot knife through butter. The louse faltered and lust looked up at Alastor, panting slightly.

“You don’t like it.”

He said, looking dejected. His antennae drooped and he refused to make eye contact. That was unacceptable. Alastor swooped down to plant a rare kiss on his forehead. 

“It is by far the most thoughtful and understanding thing anyone has ever done for me.” Alastor assured him, taking Val’s head in both his hands, caressing his cheek with a thumb. “And I love you for it, you ridiculous insect. But please don’t mutilate yourself for me”

“I would do anything for you. A little pain is nothing.”

Alastor chuckled and made his way over to the other end of the table.

“Smooth talker.”

“You know it, baby.”

“Well, if it is here, I would be delighted to partake in this, most special, meal.

Valentino smiled with no small amount of relief as Alastor primly took a seat. He examined the meat before him. It was tinged purple, blue blood leaking from the muscle. Very fresh.

“Sorry I didn’t cook it, I didn’t want to burn it.”

Alastor shook his head, selecting a small but dark looking cut..

“I don’t cook the prime cuts, my dear. And this is as premium as it gets.”

He forwent cutlery. Valentino wanted sensuality out of this experience, and after everything the pimp had done, he was absolutely going to indulge. He wrapped his tongue around it and drew it into his mouth. The bitter flavors exploded on his tongue and he closed his eyes with a groan.

It was exquisite.

The small tastes he had managed to take was nothing compared to a proper mouthful. Alastor immediately knew that if he took even another bite, he would need this again. He pushed the plate away a little.

He knew his hunger. He couldn’t afford to ask for more. Val had already done so much…

“What’s wrong baby? Do… Do I taste bad?”

“You are the single most delicious thing I have ever tasted in my life,” Alastor found himself blurting out.”And I fear that if I eat more, I’ll never be able to stop.”

One of Valentino’s long arms stretched across the table and Alastor’s bloodsoaked hand was taken in his.

“Then I will give you as much as you need.” He looked at Alastor with a strange light in his eyes. “Get addicted to me, Alastor. And I’ll give you everything I have.”

Val plucked another piece of meat from the plate and brought it to Alastor’s lips.

The scent of blood under his nose and Val’s words and the atmosphere cause the radio demon to lose what little self restraint he had. He took the meat straight from Val’s hand with a pleased groan.

And then he feasted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not featured but defenetly happened, Alastor carrying Val to bed after dinner because he was sore from the surgery and post-dinner cuddles.


	5. Multimedia Production

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vox and Alastor could never get along, which is a shame because Val would really like for them to stop fighting over him.
> 
> When Val is put in danger by curcumstances bigger than either of them, Alastor and Vox will have to unite to protect him. In doing so they might even discover something about themselves...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was supposed to be a jealous!Al chapter. I got so very sidetracked... I was struck by inspiration and wrote this whole thing in 4 hours. I'm sorry if it's a little left field, I was trying something new.
> 
> Less about Al and Val, this one. I wanted to do an exploration of my favorite techy bois! In all honesty, the relationship between Vox and Alastor, however it manifests, is going to be really interesting to me. I can just feel it. Not Vox/Al, but an exploration of just how damn compatible those two are in other ways.

Alastor and Vox had been at each other’s throats since Vox came into power.

It was a mighty shame, too. Because if you asked Val, they were actually quite similar, and would probably get along great if their powers were different.

Vox, much like Alastor, had won the lottery all sinners faced and had fallen to hell with some really useful powers. Powers that grew naturally in the right environment, and became self sustaining very quickly. However, Alastor had the unique advantage of dropping down to hell not entirely human. He had practiced voodoo in life, and although he never spoke about it, Val suspected The Wendigo predated Alastor’s death. 

Vox had remained a demilord for a solid few decades, never quite matching up to Alastor’s supernatural advantage. But then in the 70s, the information age had hit; humans invented the internet, and it was onwards and upwards for Vox from there. His screen had gone from a blocky little monitor to a flatscreen in less than thirty years, body becoming sleeker and darker, powers growing with every new smartphone and monitor that came into existence.

If you asked either of them, they would say it was inevitable. That they couldn’t exist in tandem because the very being of the other was a threat to their respective crafts. Alastor found Vox offensive, a bastardization of what he knew and loved. ‘Like a Frankenstien with a face you know.’, Alastor had told him once after a heated argument about not picking fights with Val’s friends. Vox did not endear himself to the Radio Demon either. He wasn’t quiet about the fact that he thought Alastor was outdated and obsolete. That he was a waste of resources that could be used for better, more modern things. 

In fairness, their respective businesses required similar resources, and they were naturally in competition for them. That being said, it was no secret that they also fought for the sake of fighting each other.

They fought over technological presences and production resources. There were still plenty of radios around hell, having a radio could buy you precious seconds of warning when the radio demon was on a rampage and heading your way, and Vox made a face every time he saw one on a windowsill or in a bar. They fought over airspace and the best places for towers. The battle for that one hill off the western point had been epic, elevated ground was hard to find in Pentagram, and had ended up destroying the hill in the process. 

And, perhaps most grating, they now fought over Val’s attention.

“But we’ve done it every year since the eighties!”

“This reservation had a  _ three year waiting list!” _

Val felt very much that he was trapped between two rabid dogs, not that he would ever make the comparison, lest Alastor revoke cuddling rights. Alastor and Vox were on either side of him, the tip of Alastor’s nose mere inches from Vox’s screen. Both of their body languages screamed aggression, the kind of rise which only the other could get out of them.

The louse wanted the ground to swallow him.

He had, like an idiot, double booked himself with two of the most competitive assholes in hell. Both events were the type you made and forgot about. There were plenty of restaurants in hell that you made a booking with and then just waited for the clock to tick down on the monster waiting list. Alastor had wanted dearly to go to this place. The whole reason they even put up with the waiting list was how badly Alastor wanted to go. This unique little joint in the cannibal colony was notorious for taking precisely no shit, and Alastor wasn’t willing to risk pissing them off and not being allowed to eat there. He’d figured when the date rolled around, it would be any day  _ other _ than the day he and Vox annually hosted a party/orgy in Vox’s territory. 

Trapped between a rock and a hard place, he couldn’t choose an activity without grievously offending the other. The only option he had was to cancel both, but he had hesitated too long, and now the two of them had all but forgotten he was there, honing in on any excuse to go at each other.

“I’m his best friend! I was having private shows in his penthouse back when you wouldn’t give him the time of day. If you think he’s going to choose you over me, you’re dreaming.”

“Considering  _ I  _ am the one he is dating, I believe he already has.”

Val needed to break this up before it got ugly. They had only traded words so far, but they were getting heated fast and it would turn into a brawl before they knew it.

“Quit it, both of you. This has been going on for hours and you’re acting like children.”

The looks of offended incredulity he got were damn near identical. Val was once again hit with the thought that if these two could put aside their differences for one damn second, they would be nigh unstoppable.

“I’m serious.” Val said harshly. “I know you both well enough to know that I won’t be able to choose one of the activities without the other throwing a fucking tantrum, so I won’t do either. You can cancel, or do it by yourselves, but I won’t take a side here when I know you’ll weaponize it.”

“But he-”

“That-”

“That’s my final fucking word. Now if you’re gonna fight, take it outside.”

He stormed out of the room and into his bedroom, locking the door behind him. He shut the blinds, turned all the lights onto maximum, and turned off his phone; effectively barring either of them from climbing into the room to bother him about the situation.

God, why the hell couldn’t they just… Get along! For fifteen minutes! He probably wouldn’t even be as pissed as he was about the situation if he hadn’t been forced to listen to them bicker for hours.

He heard them mill outside the room for a few seconds, but intentionally didn’t listen to their attempts to speak to him through the door. They eventually left. Val wished he didn’t know that they had almost definitely taken his word and gone outside to fight.

He made his way into his ensuite bathroom.

He seriously needed some self care after that whole debacle.

~~~

Sinners scattered in all directions as Vox and Alastor tore through the streets. Magic, electricity, and minions of various kinds swarmed the streets, trampling anyone underfoot. Alastor hadn’t broken out his ‘scary face’ yet, but things were still getting dicey. Alastor spun away from a barrage of cables, sparking at the ends and striking out at him like snakes. 

“It’s all your fault!” Vox howled, “Val could have dated anyone else, literally anyone, but no. It had to be you. Anyone else, he would have been fine about rescheduling, but because it’s  _ you _ , he has to bend over backwards because you go through entire phases where you don’t even want to talk to him!.”

“It’s not your place to decide who Valentino spends his time with, or how he spends time with them.”

“It is when it starts affecting me too!”

They were still going at it verbally while they threw hands. Both were getting tired, but neither would back down. Couldn’t. Not in front of the other. Alastor sent a wave of shadow at Vox, who sent out electricity to try to break through it. So focused on that was he, that he missed the tendrils coming up behind him until they swatted him down into the hoards of minions. Vox struggled to pull himself out of the swarm, buying Alastor seconds to gather a magical attack that would end this fight-

Everything froze as a loud crack of thunder crashed through the clear blue sky. A ray of light in unearthly colours shone from heaven and a flaming ball hurtled towards the ground.

An angel was falling.

It landed a few meters away, a momentous impact, bigger than it should have been. Like more mass than could be possible made impact with the road.

Angels falling from heaven wasn’t all that uncommon, but rarely was it an issue. Lucifer had been a Seraphim, and a little more structurally sound than most, even then. Exterminators were made for hell’s harsh, magic rich environment, protected somehow against the corrosive air of the sinner’s dimension. Average angels were not so well prepared. Like comets, they usually burned up before they landed, or were such emancipated husks by the time they hit the ground that there was nothing left but a few feathers and charred bone.

However, every so often, something bigger fell. 

Archangels, usually. They didn’t fare much better than the angels, honestly, but those singed remains sometimes had remnants of grace clinging to them. Grace turned unstable in hell, growing exponentially before self destructing in a burst of heavenly light. Highly corrosive to sinners and hellborn alike, a frightening and raw power, even in small doses.

So when something even bigger than an Archangel fell, it became a problem.

A Principality rank or higher would survive the fall. Stumbling around, injured and dying, with grace in their veins and a holy encoding in their blood still. Sensing evil and turning to basic instincts to  _ purge.  _ They were often insane beyond reasoning, having tumbled from their home and through the endless eons between the two dimensions. In incredible amounts of pain and fated to explode as the grace within them expanded to fill the vacuum of hell around them.

Essentially, an angel of that level became a walking, angry  _ nuke, _ the severity of which was determined by how much grace the angel had leftover in their system by the time they got down here.

This was very clearly not an Angel, nor was it an Archangel. Case in point, it was still  _ moving. _

A Power, or, perhaps, even a Virtue. The whole thing was indistinct, and yet so glaringly  _ there. _ Standing on burnt legs, too many to count. Human shaped yet not. The impression of wings on its back. Eyes, so many eyes, all but blind, black pits. It’s halo was like crystalline fractals around it, cracked and falling apart. Tragic and dying. Its grace swelling inside of it, making its body swell and writhe under its burned outer shell. It was as tall of a house, but quickly growing as it bloated.

Alastor gathered shadows around him. Vox was now the farthest thing from his mind. An angel on the rampage was a bigger issue than their fight and getting to safety was more important. It stumbled, lashing out at anything and everything in the way. Buildings, streetlamps, sinners. A trail of destruction was already forming and would only grow.

Alastor loved destruction, he adored it, but sticking around was just foolish.

“Holy  _ shit.” _

Vox’s voice behind him. The television had evidently gotten free, but the battle was over. He was staring at the behemoth moving through the city. Vox’s cartoonish cronies had vanished, and his own forces had decreased as he redistributed his power. 

“Indeed.”

“I ain’t staying to fight you for this.”

“Agreed.”

They both vanished.

~~~

_ “Good evening sinners-” _

_ “-eaking news, an angel is on the move through the lust district-” _

_ “-taying out of the way, lest you get erased! I hope-” _

_ “-a huge amount of destruction and moving through the fourth quarter-” _

_ “-heading towards the central square so I would get out of the way if I were you!” _

Both Alastor and Vox were covering the event.

They were, after all, news providers on top of everything else. It was their job to get the word out. Vox had cameras on every street corner, and was using them to cross reference where the angel was and where it was going. Alastor’s shadow puppets were eyes on the ground, following and reporting back so Alastor could spread information.

Alastor spoke into his microphone jovially. He did enjoy the carnage, from a distance. The angel had been rampaging for a few hours and had tripled in size. It was now as tall as some of the smaller skyscrapers. A steady stream of shadows were whispering in his ears about the angel’s whereabouts.

_ “Oh? I’m just finding out that the angel is heading towards…” _

He cut off for a moment as he stilled, cold spreading through his veins.

_ “Porn Studios.” _

He swallowed.

_ “Excuse me ladies and gents, I just need to make a quick call…” _

He scrambled for his phone and dialled a number with shaky hands.

Surely,  _ surely _ , Val would have heard the news and vacated. 

Surely.

But…

The phone rang and rang and didn’t go to call. Alastor made a face and felt his gut twist nervously. He tried to call again, but again, no answer. He bit his lip.

Valentino wasn’t stupid. He would get out of there if he knew what was going on. But what if he didn’t? Alastor and Vox had a monopoly on news distribution, and if he was sore with both of them…

His shadows told him that the angel was on a crash course with the studio, and growing with corrosive and destructive energy.

Alastor made up his mind.

He couldn’t risk it.

If Val wasn’t in the studio, he would come right back to his home in the gluttony circuit. He didn’t need to stay long.

Just long enough.

~~~

“Val! Val! Are you in there!”

Alastor arrived to the sound of Vox pounding on the bedroom door in the penthouse.

“What are you doing here?”

Alastor snarled. He was concerned about Val and didn;t want to have to deal with Vox. He just wanted to check Val wasn’t here, and then go.

“The door’s still locked.  _ Val!” _

“Can’t you move through cables?”

“He knows that trick, he lined the door with rubber so I can’t move through the electricity.”

Alastor couldn’t sense any shadows big enough to step through either. They were stuck outside. And the locked door implied that Val was still  _ inside.  _ The door was reinforced with magic, tech, and a holy metal alloy. Strong as could be found in hell. Even Alastor couldn’t just rip through it.

Alastor looked out the wall to wall window across the penthouse. The angel was moving outside, like a mirage shimmer in the air. A nearby skyscraper shuddered and fell to the ground. He clenched his fists and stepped up to the window, stepping through it like it wasn’t there.

“What are you doing? Val’s still in there!”

Alastor knew. He felt the wendigo prepare to lunge. Hopefully it’s resistance to holy power would shield him from the worst of it.

“If we can’t get him out, I need to herd it away from here. Before it blows.”

If it exploded here, and Val was still stuck, he would be vaporized in the holy light. Erased and gone for good.

Alastor couldn’t let that happen.

“Are you crazy? You can’t fight that thing!”

He wasn’t going to fight it, just try to lead it away from here. He lunged out towards the roof of the nearest skyscraper, letting The Wendigo loose.

~~~

Vox winced as The Wendigo screeched. He was well acquainted with the thing, having made appearances in some of their nastier fights. It looked hilariously small next to the angel, slashing at wings that were only half there and roaring into eyes that probably couldn’t see.

“Damn it…”

He had given up pounding on the door. Val wasn’t coming out, if he was here at all. Were they being stupid? Was Val somewhere totally safe? Were they doing this for nothing?

He should be smart. He should leave now. If he was lucky, the angel would get led away by the wendigo, and then blow the damn thing up when it gave up the ghost. Val’s precious studio would be safe and he would finally be rid of the outdated deer for good.

He should be.

He used his wifi to connect up to the cameras. The wendigo had gotten the angel’s attention and was drawing it away, but the angel didn’t seem to be too interested in tracking one particular target. It kept getting distracted and meandering back towards the studio.

Fuck…

Vox made a show out of gritting his teeth. He didn’t actually have teeth to grit, but the sensation of pretending was cathartic.

He walked up to the wall and put his hand to it, travelling through the wires in the wall to ground level.

Damn it all to second hell.

He made his way over to where the nagel was through the non-destroyed power lines, only to see the wendigo go flying. The angel had evidently gotten a hit in its many limbs’ wild flailing. The giant, cervine monster crashed against a pile of rubble and groaned, exposed bone grating against stone.

Vox tried his hand, drawing power from the electronics nearby and lashing out with it, sending millions of volts into the angel. He tried this a few times, and It didn’t seem to do anything other than make it stagger a little and piss it off. The wendigo huffed at him and shok dust out of it’s fur, running around the angel before floating away at the last minute to try and draw it in a direction. It caught Vox’s eye and jerked its skull faced head like an  _ asshole. _ As if it was asking why he wasn’t doing more.

“Oh shut up, you weren’t doing much more.”

They were both cut off as one of the angel’s limbs cut between them, and they had to dive out of the way. There was a strange moment where there was a rolling moment of terror and Vox realized that he and Alastor were trapped underneath the angel, entangled in its many legs. The proximity made his metal skin burn as the angel’s bloated legs moved around them, like overgrown tree trunks, deformed and horrific. A rainbow forest where so much as being touched could kill him.

The wendigo was howling, trying to avoid getting crushed. One of the angel’s wings had hit a building and a slab of concrete had landed on the creepy deer fucker’s lower body. Shit. It was definitely going to get crushed at this rate. He made a move to go and help it, but then...

He hesitated.

Wasn’t that what he wanted?

He wanted Bambi gone. Away from him, away from Val, away from his spaces and the territory and resources that were rightfully his. He deserved it, and Cupid wasted it on old fashioned and redundant crap. Val would never know that Vox could have helped. He would probably turn to Vox for support while he got over it, and then things would go back to normal once Val was over it. They could forget about the Radion Demon as his reign faded to legend.

And yet…

The thought of Val’s face when he was looking at the deer demon, talking about him, even before Alastor would so much as spare a glance…

Imagining that being snatched away…

Val somehow finding out that Vox could have done something and dispising Vox for the rest of their days…

Vox lunged forward.

“Move!”

A leg was coming down towards the wendigo. Vox gathered all the strength he had and pulled the mendigo by the massive antlers. They were comically big compared to Vox, but he still got movement. They tumbled out of the way as the Wendigo tumbled out of where it was trapped. It shrunk as it turned back into the regular ass radio demon. Vox let go of the now much smaller antlers and called over the crashes of the chaos around them.

“We need to work together! We have about an hour before this thing blows and we’re still too close to the studio! I don’t like you, and you don;t like me, but we both love Val. And that’s gonna have to be enough.”

~~~

Val stumbled out of his bedroom when what felt like an earthquake rattled his building. The remnants of his selfcare routine still on his skin, if this was the result of Al and Vox fighting, he was going to kill them…

The absolute carnage he emerged to was unexpected.

An enormous, iridescent monster was ripping through the city. It was writing with some unseen energy coming from within. The area around his building was rubble, but the studio was untouched for now. 

A fallen angel, and a powerful one.

“What the fuck…”

Flashes of red, cyan, and green were cropping up around it. Magic. What the hell, was someone trying to fight the damn thing?

He shook his head. Forget whoever was stupid enough to try and take on a fallen angel, he needed to get into the bunker. He had an underground bunker for this exact purpose. Deep below hell’s surface, deep enough that it would survive the inevitable explosion. He made his way to the elevator and selected the special button that needed a password.

He just hoped Vox and Al had taken their fight elsewhere.

~~~

Combining their efforts they became a force to recon with.

Vox’s abilities worked on a higher frequency than Alastor’s lower pitches. Usually they clashed and caused interference like microphone feedback. A loop that hurt both of their ears. Sometimes they would amp it up, making the screeching worse to try to unnerve the other.

Never had they tried to synchronize.

Until now.

As they fired their respective magics, Vox pulled down his frequencies, Alastor driving his own up. 

They had only done it to reduce wave pollution and improve each other’s aim. What it resulted in was so much more than that. Vox’s cyan magic mixed with Alastor’s green and red and suddenly went a deep purple, twirling together in the air and slamming into the angel with a tooth rattling crash.

“What the hell?”

“What did you do?”

“Just brought my frequency down a bit!”

“Well, do it again!”

The next one hit even harder and the angel let out a musical wail, like a choir dying. It was a sound that rang of victory. Finally, they were doing some real damage. Maybe this wasn’ impossible after all.

~~~

They worked like that for more than half an hour, and they had done a good job of driving it back, but it wasn’t far enough. The angel’s body was convulsing and glowing with refracting light, but neither of them wanted to be the one to say they should go. As far as they knew, Val was still in the penthouse. Val wasn’t like them. He couldn’t teleport. Hr would be stuck in the building. They  _ needed _ to drive this thing away.

They looked back at the studio behind them, the only building undamaged due to their careful guarding.

**_For Valentino._ **

They, without meaning to, stepped forward in tandem. Summoning magic from their very core. Shifting it to accommodate the other.

And then something very strange happened.

~~~

_ It was like they were taller. Or they  _ **_were_ ** _ taller. Half the size of the angel, but significantly bigger than they had been. They suddenly had more limbs and more eyes and more mouths. Fur and metal. Wire like senew, bone like armour. They opened their many mouths and screeched like static. Old and new in a behemoth. Fury, magic, technology and  _ **_rage_ ** _. _

_ They were greedy, they were hungry, they were prideful. _

**_And they wanted to protect._ **

_ It was dizzying, it was elating, it was  _ **_everything_ ** _. _

_ They could see waves in the air. They reached out to touch them and they bent. The angel before them flinched as they pulled on what they could see. The angel’s form rippled and it screamed. They used those screams to do it again.  _

_ They reached up and grasped one of the angel’s wings and twisted. They expected it to hurt, but some part of them knew it wouldn’t. Part of them was older than that, and couldn’t be hurt by holy power. They pulled the wing towards a mouth where their stomach might be. It opened in a crunch of bone and the wing vanished into a gaping black hole of a stomach. _

_ Oh  _ **_yes_ ** _. _

_ They raised a hand and bonds of pure electricity bound the angel’s many limbs before it started to pull. _

_ Each mouth was hungry, and they had many. _

_ From each limb they ripped away spilled grace, but they lapped that up too. It burned, but they didn’t care. Once in the other dimension in its stomach, it wouldn't hurt them any more. _

_ Gradually, they ripped the angel apart and it disappeared into its many mouths. They were disappointed when there was nothing left. _

_ The threat gone, they looked back at the building.  _

_ Safe. Whole. _

_ They were done. _

_ Their form wavered as they came back to themselves. _

**_Get off of me!_ **

**_Get away!_ **

**_Not self. Be gone._ **

_ The pieces split apart. _

~~~

Val had eventually emerged four hours later when he was fairly certain it was safe. He’d had to be caught up by Velvet. Vox and Alastor were oddly quiet on the matter. There had been substantial damage to all the buildings but his. There had been, however, no explosion.

The security footage from Vox’s cameras was gone, or so he said. But someone had apparently filmed what had happened. An imp who was, apparently, willing to die to get a trending story on PentaGram.

Alastor and Vox would adamantly deny having any knowledge of what the hell the six story behemoth of a demon was. Six arms, four legs, shaggy fur and bone plating, with insides a medley of machine and flesh. Mouths everywhere and eyes made up of cameras and screens. Spines of antler and bone sticking from it in every direction. Apparently capable of eating a whole fallen angel.

They would, however, sometimes stare at it with some sort of morbid fascination, as if they were trying to find themselves in that monster, even by demon standards.

~~~

_ (They tried to do it again, only once. It didn’t work. Being so close made Alastor uncomfortable and he reported that the wendigo refused to have ‘non-self/prey invade them again. Vox huffed and said he didn’t want to have fur anyway. Too much hassle.) _

_ (But they both had dreams about the power rush for centuries afterwards.) _


	6. A Dangerous Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keeping up with the times is tricky for an old man sometimes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really just an excuse to write the V gang hanging out tbh.
> 
> Velvet does make a comment that's somewhat derogatry to furries in this chapter. I wanted to say that her veiws on the matter do not reflect my own, but I figured as the social media demon, she would embody the cutthroat 'if-it's-not-trendy-anymore' mentality. Nothing wrong w furries, not my cup of tea, but they seem to be a v creative and talented group of people. There are bad eggs, but you find those everywhere. Rock on my dudes.

Alastor loved games, always had. 

There weren’t many children to play with in the bayou, and the ones that were around didn’t like him much. They said he was creepy. Alastor had learned to curb some of his more… unnerving traits, but that had been later in life. But that was alright, because there had been the radio, and there had been games. 

His mother had taught him checkers and chess. There had been many quiet games of cards tucked away behind closed doors as his father drank away tonight's third bottle. He learned solitaire and speed, and was quite the jacks player, if he did say so himself. 

As time wore on and those grew boring (or in some cases, he ran out of people to play with), he found games with a bit more edge. Wading through the marsh, following the hissing of the gators. Learning to sneak up and pounce on raccoons and rabbits making their way through the underbrush. Seeing how long they could last as he dragged knives through their fur or twisted their little necks. He moved onto bigger prey eventually, and made a game of that too. Getting his victims to trust him, to follow. How long could he keep them complacent and unaware, even as he prepped the pot for them? 

Then he had played a game of chase he hadn’t enjoyed so much, and Hell opened up a whole new world's worth of games.

Valentino liked games too. Some, Alastor was interested in, like their ‘role-plays’ or ‘how uncomfortable can I make this loan shark before he pisses his pants?’. 

Others, Alastor was not fond of at all. The less said about  _ them  _ the better.

But this one. This one was the worst.

“-And they said rawr. Who says rawr nowadays, Val? That’s some furry bullshit.” Velvet draped herself dramatically over the end of the sofa, letting her pigtails fall around her face and looking imploringly at Vox. “Please tell me there was something incriminating in his search history, Voxxie. If we have to strike a deal with this guy I’m gonna die. He’s so cringey.”

Vox made a dismissing gesture with his hand.

“Nothing, sorry Vel. Vore, which we already knew he was into, and some of that wonderbread shit, but other than that… Nothing worth canning the deal. We can’t really judge the guy on being a kinky shit, all things considered.”

“I still don’t like his vibe. Do you think I could cancel him before he starts trending mainstream? I work fast…”

“You just don’t like him because he dresses like an incel.”

Valentino rolled his eyes.

“Quit griping. His camera work is good, that’s all I care about. If he makes a move on one of the girls, he’s out of here, but quit trying to sabotage my business.”

Alastor sat snugly between Valentino’s legs, head resting against the fluffy collar of the louse’s coat, absolutely lost.

Furry? Incel?  _ Trending? _

They were talking business, or at least he  _ thought _ it was business, not that he would be able to tell either way. 

This was it, the most dangerous of games. He didn’t have the slightest clue what some of the words they were using meant and was now faced with the challenge of parsing it out before anyone asked his opinion on anything. 

He didn’t want to admit how… Behind he was. 

Usually he wore it with pride, but sometimes this particular trio made him… A little self conscious. They were a savvy bunch, at the forefront of fashion and technology. There was a stark difference between having preferences about the type of environment you surround yourself with and being the only one in the room who had no idea what was going on.

He knew he could use the ‘hell-phone’ that Val had given him to find out, in the little hell-web application, but that too held risk. Some of the searches yielded helpful results. Others… Were a little  _ too _ helpful.

He regretted ever even hearing the utterance of the word ‘hentai’.

“We could always sic Al on him,” Velvet suggested, “Make it look like an accident.”

Oh dear Lucifer falling from heaven, leave him out of this!

Okay, ‘sic’ he knew. That was something to start from. They wanted him to attack someone? This ‘incel’ person? Velvet did not seem to like this poor fellow, whoever he was, although Alastor couldn’t quite grasp why. Because he was… ‘cringey’? To cringe was to flinch, or to curl over in fear… Was he frightening? Velvet was not easily cowed… And he didn’t dare to make a guess as to what ‘wonderbread’ or ‘vore’ could possibly mean.

Whatever the reason, Valentino still seemed to have use for this person, so perhaps he should refuse? Something open would be best for this. Perhaps…

“I will not inconvenience Valentino’s business.” He turned to grin at the pimp, all sharp teeth and mischief. “But I am always keen for a hunt if he doesn’t meet your standards, my love.”

Valentino shifted a little with a slightly dazed expression on his face. Alastor suspected his little display had secondary effects, but if it did, Val kept them to himself.

“Fuck baby, the things you say to me.” 

Val teased. Alastor scoffed and swatted the pimp in the face with an ear.

“Quit flirting while we’re talking.”

Vox grumbled as Velvet cooed before going back to her phone. Attention officially off of him, Alastor relaxed back against Valentino. He had won the game today, it seemed. Safe yet again. Four arms wrapped around him. Loose enough that he could escape with ease, if he wanted, but tight enough to be a secure weight. 

He allowed them to stay.

~~~

Once Velvet and Vox departed, Val moved them to the bedroom by scooping Alastor up in a bridal carry.. Alastor was mostly dozing and did not object to being lifted, for once.

“Sorry we were talking business all day, babe.” The louse murmured into Alastor’s ear. “Hope you weren’t too bored.”

“No issue.” Alastor said flippantly. “It was… interesting.”

“I’m surprised you could keep up with half of it.”

Alastor only hummed in response as Val tightened his grip a little.

“You were teasing me then, with your little stunt and your little smile. You know what your darker side does to me. Would you really hunt someone down for me if they disappoint me?”

Alastor tried to read whether Val meant that in a sexual way, but when he looked into the louse’s face, he just saw love. He smiled again, although it was softer.

“In a heartbeat.”

~~~

“Angel Dust?”

“Yeah, Al?”

“What is vore?”

The sound of Angel spitting out his drink and choking as it went down the wrong way filled the lobby. A few pained gasps before the spider seemed able to speak again. He looked sorely tempted to ask where the deer had heard such a term, before he thought better of it and simply answered:

“...You don’t wanna know.”

Alastor considered the reaction he had gotten and nodded slowly.

“Noted.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact, the phrase 'sic em' is really old, tracing back to Johnson J. Hooper’s 'Adventures of Capt. Simon Suggs' in 1845. 
> 
> Also, would ya'll be opposed to me adding in an OC to this story? She would probably only turn up once unless you guys like her. I need her for a very particular, angst related, purpose.


	7. The Theory of Falling Apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor has a bad extermination day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minor charcter (OC) death. Something of a vent fic, there's some stuff going on rn. :/ Title might make sense later.

_ “I thought you said that place was safe.” _

_ Alastor scolded, a pained edge to his voice, and the figure lying below him let out a breathless chuckle. _

_ “It always... has been in the past… How was… How was I supposed to know… that the ass would run in?” _

_ “You should have come to the hotel, or the tower…” _

_ “That’s the… the other side of the city! I wasn’t… ugh… I wasn’t gonna make the journey for that… It… It was just an extermination….” _

_ Alastor winced. _

_ “From the looks of it, it was your last.” _

_ “Don’t sound so ple- Wait, Al… Don’t make that- Come… come on, chin up. Gotta… Gotta die sometime, right?” _

_ Black feathers, sodden with blood, rustled as the figure attempted to sit up. Something made an ugly squelching and the other demon gave up and eased back into it’s back. Alastor cringed. He had no problem with blood, but the emotions churning in his belly were unfamiliar and made him feel ill. _

_ “No! We are already dead, you did not need to die again. You were foolish, and reckless, and now you’re- You’re...” _

_ “…. Are you… Are you just gonna... stand there lecturing me the whole time?” _

_ “I… Believe I am stalling.” _

_ “Yeah, no kidding.” _

_ ~~~ _

Val had never been so on edge in his life. Extermination day had come and gone, and he was yet to see Alastor. The two of them had a routine. They would wait out the extermination in their respective homes or safehouses, and then meet up once it was over. Curl into each other and thank their respective lucky stars that the other made it another year. They were both too big for the angels, but that would not always stop the holy brigades from trying. Neither of them made a habit of showing it, but they were both on edge for extermination.

He would hear Alastor whispering sometimes, to the shadows or to the little dolls full of sand and hair that he kept. Other times he would card his hands over Val’s body, just experiencing him, and stare and stare and stare without blinking as the radio channels buzzed around them. Alastor rarely showed affection physically, so those were special moments. Alastor was an enigma when it came to touch. He would invade personal space like he owned it, but then shy from even the lightest of touches in an everyday environment. Alastor used personal space as both a weapon and a defence, it didn’t mean the same thing to him as it did others, he had a language all his own. 

Over the time they had been dating, Val had learned that Alastor gave affection in the smallest of ways. Whispers, rituals and little gestures that meant more to Alastor than to anyone else, but came from the heart and felt more genuine than if he made a big deal out of it. Like Alastor refusing to pass Valentino things with his left hand, and crafting little charms to hide about his home. It had taken the louse a little while to understand, but once he understood, he’d been very touched, it was like he was privy to a whole other person. A whole other side to the audio demon that few were ever privy to.

He turned his eyes to his phone, hoping for more news.

Alastor was yet to turn up. 

He knew his lover was alive, one of the only things keeping him sane, a short text had been sent at midnight. But the contents of the text had been…

Concerning.

‘I am alive. I will be late.’

That was it.

No explanation, no reassurances. Val didn’t know what to make of it. He didn’t want to call, whatever this was, it was probably important. Some part of him scowled at the thought of it being more important than him, but he squashed it down. Alastor still had a life outside of him, and while he was getting better at getting Val into it, over a century of carefully curated walls did not fall in a day, or even a decade or two.

They had all the time in the world.

He just needed to be patient. Loving Alastor was like eating a pomegranate, more an experience than a meal. Teasing all the little seeds of information from him was a labor of love, but the morsels were sweet and rewarding. Knowing that he was the first to be allowed so close, to get so far, was touching in and of itself.

Alastor was worth waiting for, and so he would wait.

Almost twelve hours after that text, Val was lying awake in bed, wondering what on earth could have caused Alastor to break their twenty year routine, when there was a rippling in the shadows. Valentino squinted into the dark. His night vision wasn’t insignificant, most forged in hellfire could see in the dark, but he could only see the vague outline. He looked up to see a silhouette in the corners of the room, the shadows condensing, darkening to an inky black.

“Al?”

The figure turned and Val was greeted by glowing red eyes, pupils like dials. The image of them was flickering and shaking, and the shadows were starting to buzz with static. That was Alastor, all right, and something was definitely wrong. Was he upset? Was he hurt? Val climbed off the bed and walked over, made his movements slow and obvious, hands out so Alastor could choose how much or little contact he wanted.

He didn’t expect Alastor to all but dive into his arms, burying his face into the fluff of Valentino’s collar. Val was still in shock for a moment before closing his arms around Alastor and pulling him close. The deer demon was trembling, and covered in blood. Hands curled in the white fur and leaving ruddy stains on the pimp’s coat.

“Alastor?”

~~~

_ “I can feel… feel my organs shutting down, that’s an... odd feeling.” _

_ “It figures that even dying cannot silence you.” _

_ Another laugh, how could she laugh at a time like this? An obnoxious, cawing thing that made her lungs wheeze and gurgle. There was blood in them, no doubt, and she was still talking. Always talking. Soon to be twice dead and still so much to say. _

_ “That’s funny… you’re not… even the first person to say that to me. Fuckers... wanted me for information…. but ended up gagging me in the first hour.” _

_ “ We could be getting you to help instead of chatting-” _

_ “Help? For… for a holy spear through the chest? It didn’t hit anything major, but there’s... only one way to ‘help’... a wound like this.” _

_ “I- I don’t want to…” _

_ It was hard to parse expressions on a face with a beak, but Alastor had practice. The curve of her eye was distinctly guilty. _

_ “I’m… sorry… I didn't...” She clicked her beak a few times and she blinked slowly. “I didn’t… want to… die slowly again.” _

_ Her first death had taken weeks, she’d told him. A slow descent towards an end she knew was coming, but couldn’t escape. Alastor could understand, but it didn’t make the experience… easy. _

_ “You don’t have-” _

_ “No. I’ll- I’ll do it.” _

_ ~~~ _

“What happened, baby? Talk to me.”

Val could feel the fur on his collar wet with blood and what he suspected were tears too. The deer shook his head like a child and continued to shake. Alastor looked up at him, face framed with white fluff and eyes more red from crying than magic. Val tightened his grip, squeezing Alastor tightly. 

“Okay. That’s okay. Come here.”

He guided Alastor to the bathroom, wetting a towel and starting to wipe away the blood on his hands, all without letting go of Alastor and allowing him to maintain the amount of contact he clearly needed. One of Alastor’s hands were clenched tightly around something. He tried to open the hand and extract it, but Alastor just squeezed it tighter.

“Don’t… It’s- It’s all- It’s all-”

Alastor stuttered over the words, like a record skipping over the same words over and over again. Val took his hands away from the hand and just continued to clean the blood off of Alastor’s hands and face. Val curled his hands around Alastor’s sides, rubbing them softly. He could feel every rub and vertebrae under Alastor’s suits, but it didn’t concern him. Al was literally all skin and bones. The louse felt a sudden and powerful surge of protectiveness. Whateber had Alastor in such a state would be dealt with later. For now...

“It’s okay, babe. I got you. I got you…”

Alastor fucking  _ whimpered _ and Val cursed internally. When he found whoever did this, there was gonna be blood.

~~~

_ Alastor liked the taste of blood. He liked the crunching of bin and the strange and delightful little noises bodies made as he ripped their throats out with his teeth. _

_ But this was awful. _

_ He hated how normal it was. How routine. How he could lose himself in the actions of eating and forget that the corpse under his hands and teeth meant anything to him, once upon a time. He hated that he could see the moment that the spark of life left her eyes. His fingers curled around the feathers on her shoulders, so tightly he ripped them right out. He looked down at the glossy feathers, slick with blood, and his hands started to shake.  _

_ He hadn’t reacted to a kill like this in…. _

_ Well, it had been a while. _

_ After a while, he stopped. He had eaten her throat and her heart and her lungs.  _

_ She wasn’t coming back. _

_ His stomach howled, protesting him not eating when there was a meal in front of him, but he couldn’t do any more. She deserved to be sent off properly… She deserved a burial… Or something… He sat there, staring at the pile of gore blankly, until the body started to turn to ash. Her soul had vacated, and this wasn’t the mortal world. When the soul left, there wasn’t much holding the body together, and it turned to nothing. His eyes widened. Wait- He still needed- _

_ The body disintegrated and all that was left was Alastor’s handful of feathers. _

~~~

After Alastor was cleaned up, wrapped in Valentino’s coat, and huddled near a fire, Val went to order them food. By the time he returned, Alastor was staring down at his hands, which were now open and carefully cradling a crushed handful of bloody feathers. They were small and a glossy black.

“Babe?”

“I…” Alastor’s eyes remained locked on the feathers. “I killed a friend today. This is all that’s left...”

Valentino frowned, and walked over, sitting next to his lover in solidarity.

“What happened?”

“She got caught by an angel, a spear through the chest… She was going to die slowly… She asked me- begged me…” Val got the picture. He furrowed his brow and held out his arms. Alastor did not appear to want another hug, but took Valentino’s top left in his right. “She’s gone. Forever. I’m never going to hear her voice again…”Valentino didn’t know what to do other than be there, but that seemed to be exactly what Alastor needed, just leaning into the louse and breathing softly.

“Is there anything you could do that would make you feel better?”

Val asked. Alastor shook his head, but then hesitated. “I want… to use the feathers in a spell… Use her energy…”

Val nodded.

Alastor showed his affection in strange, personal ways.

He grieved the same way.

“What do you need? Do you want to do it together, or on your own?”

Alastor gave Val a shaky smile.

“I have everything I need. Just… Stay with me?”

“Always, love.”


	8. Another Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone needs some me-time every once in a while

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Highly inspired by a peice of fanart I saw on tumblr by @creaturecandies, who does fantastic Hazbin stuff.

Alastor’s shoes made delightful crunching noises as he walked through the grass. This was one of the lusher areas of hell. It was a tame facsimile of hell’s wilds, really, a repurposed back garden; once owned by an overlord that had long since disappeared past Alastor’s teeth. Where most of hell’s wilderness was teaming with hellbeasts and hostile magic, this place had been beaten into submission. The wildlife hunted down and killed, the more dangerous plants uprooted and hauled away. Leaving what essentially equated to a meadow, with some forests tapering towards the back end of the area before the landscape was broken up by dark, jagged mountains.

It was out of the way of Pentagram, one of a few little patches of territory owned by Alastor not directly part of the city. The overlord that had lived here had tried to run and hide away from the danger zone, but he should have known he wouldn't be safe. Not once Alastor was interested.

Keeping the garden hadn’t been the plan, but…

Alastor glanced around, and his shadow set out to scout. It wasn’t that he thought anyone would be foolish enough to venture into his territory when they knew him to be on the property, but it was always worth checking before he… indulged.

The shadow returned, swirling at his feet. Assured that he was alone, Alastor was content to take his skin off.

His bones cracked and bent, similarly to how they did when the wendigo came out to play, but instead of getting bigger, everything got smaller. He felt himself condensing down to baser instincts and smaller features. Fingers and feel melted together into cloven hooves. His skull elongated and he dropped to all fours like it was the most natural thing in the world. There was a throbbing behind his eyes as his antlers grew a little, up instead of out like they would when he was trying to intimidate someone. Hell’s vibrant reds faded into muted blues and yellows and the scent of the grass grew sweet.

A red and black deer stood in the place of the radio demon only a few seconds later.

He made a contented little huffing noise and picked through the grass on newly dainty feet. It only took him seconds to gain energy and rhythm and start bounding through the tall grass. Frolicking through particularly deep patches and sprinting the length of the field. He felt like he could run and run and never tire or bore of it. Wind whistling in his ears, scents swirling around him. 

It was amazing.

For a creature who had to work so hard to stay entertained, when the world was so damn boring… And for someone who tended to overthink… Moments like this, when every single thing was good and satisfying, was like bliss.

The hotel was… busy, at the moment. It always was the first few weeks after an extermination. When demons are once again faced with the concept of their second end and flock to what they see as an easy out, all momentarily forgetting the pain, misery, and difficulty that comes with the trail to redemption. This pattern had been consistent since Alastor had started sponsoring it, but had become even more so since Charlie's first success a few years ago.

That had been a culmination of Charlie’s enthusiasm and unwavering faith, Alastor’s support, and some advice from a friend.

The thought made Alastor cringe. Charlie didn’t know just how much the success of the hotel had been influenced by that bird. Alastor would have supported her anyway, he owed her father that much, but Cora was the one who had convinced him that the idea may actually have potential.

The past few weeks have been difficult. He’d known he would miss his friend, but he hadn’t expected it to feel this… empty. He didn’t talk to her every day or anything, but knowing that he no longer had the option wore on his mind. He’d been doing right handed spellwork; an art that he found much harder than his usual lefthanded fare, but he refused to sully Cora’s memory by making a curse out of her, though he suspected she would make a beautiful one. His beloved had been busy too. One of his stars had been taken out by the angels only one week before filming was due to start, and he had to find a replacement fast. Alastor was no help in Valentino’s industry, so the best help he could provide was staying out of the way so his lover could work.

It was stressful, it  _ had been _ stressful. But now he could run and run and run until all the thoughts were behind him. His shadow pulled itself from the ground and joined him soon enough, the two deer dancing around each other. Playing elaborate games of chase through the underbrush and racing up and down the field. The shadow would dart and and out of the dappled shadow on the treeline when they skirted it, and the two of them made a game of zipping through the trees. Eventually they came to a stop, near a patch of clover and a particularly deep patch of grass, Alastor flopping down onto his side. The light breeze whistled through the grasses and made a sound like ocean waves.

It wasn’t the soft sounds of the bayou of his youth, but something deep inside of him heard these sounds and was complete. The only thing he needed was…

He glanced over and a radio appeared, nestled into the greenery. It started playing some soft jazz and Alastor leaned even further back, almost rolling onto his back. He twisted his head and bit the head off of one of the clovers, munching carefully. He preferred the taste of meat, of course, but like many things, in this form it just felt right to do so. His shadow slipped out of it’s deer shape and gently tugged it’s master into its lap. The cold hands gently pet his fur and it felt good. Hands never lingering too long and staying clear of the places where Alastor couldn’t bear to be touched right now, simply knowing what he needed without any need for communication.

The shadow sent an image of Valentino in the place of the shadow, both Alastor and the shadow in their deer forms. They were happily settled in the pimp’s lap, his coat acting as a nest for them as they received loving petting from the louse. 

_ Four hands, plenty to share. _

It crooned through their bond and Alastor snorted, although he couldn’t deny… The thought held some appeal, especially now when inhibitions were low, the petting felt good, and the concept of denying it for a reason like pride made little sense.

**Perhaps some other time.**

Alastor replied. The shadow ginned because it knew that wasn’t a no. The cheeky thing. He let his eyes slip shut and simply… enjoy the simplicity of the moment. The sound of the wind and the scent of the grass and the taste of the clover. Like this, even his ceaseless hunger receded to a dull ache, like it was afraid of ruining the moment.

He would have to return soon, these moments never lasted, and he was sure he would bore of it eventually if they did. But he was always sad to see them go. He must have lay there for hours before he eventually pulled himself to his hooves. His shadow sighed and melted back into the ground as Alastor shook off his deer form and returned to his more human appearance.

That was fun, but it couldn’t be forever. His brain returned to rapid-fire thinking and soon enough he had a long to-do list for the rest of the day. But, the good mood that came of the rest followed him for the rest of the day

Valentino met up with him that night, closer to the next morning really, and embraced him, albeit tentatively. Alastor, still in a good mood, returned the gesture wholeheartedly.

“How was your day, babe?” The louse asked tiredly. “Hope it was better than mine…”

Alastor nodded.

“It was productive, and I found some time to enjoy myself, as well.”

“Enjoy yourself, huh?”

The pimp raised an eyebrow and chuckled a little. Alastor huffed, but his smile was still genuine. He knew, by now, that Valentino meant nothing by it and expected nothing from him. It was simply a form of banter, and Alastor had always loved that.

“Oh, you are revolting.”

“You still love me though.”

Alastor smiled.

“Yes, I suppose I do. Oh, speaking of caring... Here, wear this.”

He handed Valentino a leather string with a charm on the end. A few of Cora’s feathers caught the light and the whole thing gave off a slight pulse of power.

“What is it?”

Valentino asked, lifting it to examine it. The first time Alastor had presented him with a charm, Valentino had been a little disturbed with being presented with parts of a dead demon, but he had grown accustomed to it since they’d started dating properly.

“It’s a protection charm I made with Cora’s feathers. It’s… strong. They tend to be when the subject is- was- close to you. I… want you to have it.”

“Are you sure? I’m flattered, baby, but this is your friend’s-”

“I can think of nobody I would rather protect than you, my love.”

Val stared at Alastor a while, a slightly love struck face frozen for a moment, before placing the charm around his neck and tucking it under his shirt.

“Then I’ll never take it off. Thank you babe.”

The louse planted a gentle kiss on Alastor’s cheek and turned in for the night. Alastor, for once, followed him rather than going back to his home to sleep.

It had been a good day, and he would end it with the one he loved.


	9. A Shitty Work Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Val takes down a cartel that’s been killing his workers behind his back. Takes place simultaneously to chapter 8.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in the span of a few hours, inspiration really picks and chooses, doesm't it?
> 
> Some heavy shit in this chapter. Some light/allusions to torture, another monor character death, some bad language... 
> 
> We're gearing up for something big folks, can you feel it? That's plot in the air, that is.

Valentino really didn’t have time for this shit. He had run three auditions today to try and replace Holly. It had gone long, and half the actors hadn’t even known what they were signing up for. He missed the days where he could wave a bag of cocaine in front of Angel’s face and that would be that. Angel’s name sold itself, and slapping his name on a movie was easy viewership. But the princess’s little passion project had put a stop to that and Alastor actually cared about her, so anything to hurt her, even peripherally, was off the table. 

Needless to say, it had been a long day and he wanted to go home. He wanted to talk to Alastor, who would wait for him before going to bed so they could talk before ending the day. He was tired, hungry and he didn’t have fucking time to go chasing up on somebody who thought they could weasel their way out of paying up. He wasn’t some Santa figure that these bozos could mooch off and if they wanted free turf to sell on then they should fight for it in the gluttony district like everyone else.

Sales were always better in the lust district, the sin of longing such a siren’s son in comparison to gluttony’s call for overindulgence. 

Valentino knew this and ruled his district with an iron fist to ensure that he made the most of every faucet of his territory. One did not run a business in hell without being cut-throat, take that tycoon who dropped down in the sixties for example. It was rare that a sinner made it so far up the business ladder in hell when hellborns had something of a leg-up, it was even rarer for it to be an animal like a _mouse_ of all things, but the crazy son of a bitch was in everything. Val was very glad that Walt Disney was not interested in expanding into the porn industry, or he would have one hell of a fight on his hands. As it was, the guy was nipping at Vox’s heels until the invention of the internet had secured Vox’s place a little better. Even now, Vox gave the mouse a lot of business to appease him. The TV demon didn’t say it, but Val could tell it wasn't a fight he wanted to have.

Val sighed and made his way over to where his sources had seen the mongrels hiding out. A warehouse off the filming lots in the northern end, abandoned since he moved the major filming to the new studio. Hopefully he could make this quick and be back on time. He drew a gun from his coat, holy metal for bullets. Hopefully he wouldn’t need it, but one could never be too careful.

He was ready to go in guns blazing, but he was also on a time limit and picking them off without causing a big fight would probably be more time effective in the long run. He only needed one of them to take the message back to the suppliers, the others were disposable.. So he slunk in quietly. His heels didn’t make a sound as he moved over the stone floor. Valentino was a dramatic bitch, sure, but he could be stealthy when he needed to be. He followed voices to the main area of the warehouse where six demons seemed to be gathered around something on the ground.

Conveniently distracted.

His gun was cocked and aimed at the back of a head, when he heard something. It sounded like muffled screaming, coming from where the demons were gathered. He cocked his head.

“Okay, I think she’s had enough. Ungag the bitch already.”

The lion shaped demon growled and there was the sound of duct tape coming off skin and low, pained moans.

Very familiar moans. But… That wasn’t possible…

“We’ve been at this too fucking long, you’re the fifth fucking whore we’ve taken. Do what you do best, open your fucking mouth and just spit it out so we can all go home!”

“I told you I don’t know!”

A woman’s voice cried out and- yes. Definitely familiar. But- Holly had been killed in the extermination, or so he’d been told… He moved to try and see past the crowd and get a better view. He crouched behind some boxes and looked past the demons. He caught flashes of bright purple and green scales. Sure enough, Holly was there, duct taped to a chair and covered in what looked to be holy water burns and long gashes. Her face was stained with makeup that was smudged and clearly old. Her outfit was ripped and dirty. She had clearly been here a good, long while.

“Val never lets us up to the top floors, the only one that’s been up there is Ange- Aaaugh!”

Holly let out a pained scream as something was thrown into her face. It immediately started blistering. Holy water, definitely.

“Are you kidding me? You hold out for a _week_ just to tell us you don’t fucking know the password?”

“I told you! You didn’t listen!”

Holly wailed and Val felt something in his chest go cold. These fuckers were torturing one of his girls for, from the sounds of it, information on him. Taking his things and breaking them to try and get to him.

That would not go down well.

Val should shoot the bastards right here and now. He should, and he wanted to.

But he knew un his heart of hearts he couldnt afford to. He was undetected, for now, and he needed as much information as he could get. Apparently they had gone through four others before this. Who? How long had they been at this? What did they want? From the sounds of it, the password to his penthouse suite, but why?

“Well this was a fucking waste of time, just kill her Avalon. I told ya we should have gone for the spider bitch first.”

“Didn’t want to have to deal with the princess… But yeah, guess she’s no use now. Open wide...”

Holly made a choked sound as the lion, Avalon apparently, grabbed her face. Squeezing her cheeks until her mouth was forced open and a bottle was held up to her mouth. Valentino immediately brought his gun up, but he couldnt get a shot. There were four demons between him and the lion. 

And it was too late besides.

A long stream of holy water was poured in and the poor lizard demon let out a shriek. She thrashed aimlessly, clearly more due to pain than any real escape attempt. Blood began to pour from her mouth and nose before she finally went still.

“Well that was a fucking waste of time...”

Val had heard enough. He drew his other holy guns. Screw being stealthy, he wanted those scumbags to hurt.

He burst from his hiding place, going from hidden to a tower of unholy terror. The demons turned from the new corpse, eyes wide.

“Well, well, well. What’s all this?” He hissed dangerously, his red grin stretched wide. “I hope you shits were catholic, because you little rats had better start fucking _praying.”_

~~~

In the end, it was over rather quickly. They had used their supply of holy water to kill Holly, and they only had small blades otherwise. Val had brought a gun to a knife fight and had danced around their blades easily while shooting through some skulls.

The fight had only lasted about five minutes and Val was standing over the last one, a quivering weasel demon he had seen dealing weed in the red light district in the past.

The weasel was quivering as he stared down the barrel of Val’s gun.

“The only reason that I’m not going to kill you,” Valentino growled, voice low and dangerous. “Is so you can tell anyone that might be in on this that they have six hours to get the fuck out of my territory. If any of you are seen here again, there won’t be anything left of you. Do I make myself clear?”

The weasel stammered, but seemed unable to get words out.

“Well? Do I?!” Val roared and the demon under him squeaked and nodded. “Then get out of my sight.”

The demon scampered away, and Val made sure to shoot the fucker’s tail on the way out. He then turned to the chair where Holly had been. She had turned to ash during the fight. All that was left was her grubby outfit and a pile of dusty duct tape. Val sat down on a nearby pile of boxes and put his head in his hands.

“Shit…”

~~~

Val didn’t know how long he sat there, just… processing. He eventually pulled himself up and got a limo home, still in something of a daze. When he crawled in, Alastor was waiting for him in the penthouse. Valentino slowly, so Alastor understood what he was doing, but instantly went in for a hug. Satan knew he needed one right now. He would get over it, he had seen much worse in his time in hell and he would see worse again.

Just another day at the office.

A really shitty one, though.

Alastor accepted easily and even squeezed the louse a little. A welcome little treat. Val leaned into his deer’s touch and let the day wash off of him, Alastor’s touch a refreshing splash of paradise.

“How was your day, babe? Hope it was better than mine…”

His voice sounded hollow to his ears. Whether or not Alastor noticed, he wasn’t sure. The deer nodded though, so that was good.

“It was productive, and I found some time to enjoy myself, as well.”

The pimp cracked a little smile, seeing low hanging fruit and striving for normalcy.

“Enjoy yourself, huh?”

Alastor made an offended sound, but Val knew he appreciated the challenge of a verbal sparring match, even when Val started it with something a bit… crude, as Al would call it.

“Oh, you are revolting.”

Val laughed and pulled his lover a bit closer.

“You still love me though.”

“Yes, I suppose I do. Oh, speaking of caring... Here, wear this.”

Valentino examined what he had just been given. It was some sort of talazmin made of intricate knots, sticks, and glossy black feathers. He recognised the feathers Alastor had come home clutching on the last extermination day. He traced it with a claw, careful not to damage or move anything. He could feel power coming off it in waves.

“What is it?”

“It’s a protection charm I made with Cora’s feathers. It’s… strong. They tend to be when the subject is- was- close to you. I… want you to have it.”

Ah, he did say he wanted to make a spell. Val was no magic user, but this seemed like powerful stuff. He could feel the eb=nergy pouring off of it. He put it on, but then paused. After the day he’d had, he definitely needed some of this magical good vibes Al had going on, but this was made of the last remaining scraps Alastor had of his friend. He’d treated those feathers like they were made of gold all this time and now he was just giving them away? Surely he wanted to keep them? Keep the charm for himself?

“Are you sure? I’m flattered, baby, but this is your friend’s-”

“I can think of nobody I would rather protect than you, my love.”

Val stared at Alastor a while. He loved this man so goddamn much and every day he thought that he couldn’t feel any more affection and adoration, only for Alastor to say things like that. It was like seeing him for the first time all over again.

Valentino numbly tucked the charm under his shirt, basking in the newfound warmth in his chest. The cold shock of today was soothed by Alastor’s presence, the air of serenity the deer seemed to be carrying today.

“Then I’ll never take it off. Thank you babe.”

He eventually needed some sleep and was ready to say goodnight to Alastor. The charm felt almost light against his skin. He liked to think it was Alastor’s love for him, or at least Val’s love for Alastor that made it so powerful Val could literally sense it. The feeling of it made Val think that today had sucked, but maybe it hadn’t ended so badly.

Alastor joining him in bed that night definitely helped. There was nothing some cuddling couldn’t fix when you loved someone enough.


	10. Falling Apart - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor and Valentino's twenty-year anneversary goes awry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS CHAPTER IN THE END NOTES. PLEASE OBSERVE IF YOU MAY BE AT RISK.
> 
> This is a hard time for all of us and I don;t want anyone being hurt by my works. Please, please, please observe the new tags and the trigger warnings if you feel you may need to. Stay safe.

Tonight was going to be the best damn date in the history of Hell and Alastor would make sure of it.

Twenty years ago, today, Alastor had reluctantly and skeptically taken Valentino up on his offer for a date. The best damn decision he’d ever made, not that he’d admit it. Alastor had a select few friends. He had an element of charisma, but he was also intimidating and unstable. Something that drove off more people than it attracted, perhaps rightfully so. He’d taken a chance on Val, a risk, and he was not a gambling man, but for these twenty years, he had been legitimately and truly happy. There had been ups and down in that time, but it had been two decades of the type of constant and reassuring love that he hadn’t known since his mama left him for heaven.

Alastor slipped into the limousine, sending a smile Val’s way. The louse, who was holding the door open for him, shot him a wink before leaning down and getting in after him. The louse leaned over and planted a kiss on Alastor’s forehead. Alastor chuffed and slipped the pimp in the face gently with his ear.

“Ready?”

The pimp asked teasingly, gently pinching the ear and removing it from his face. Alastor hummed.

“Ready for what? You won’t tell me where we’re going.”

“It wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I told you, now would it?”

“True,  _ ma puce, _ but you always insist on surprising me. How am I to show my love in return, hmm?”

The pimp was making a point of keeping Alastor in the dark about what he had planned for tonight. Were it anyone else, Alastor might be on edge, but he trusted his lover enough to surrender control. For now at least. Once Val had given his surprise, Alastor had a few of his own to share. For now he simply allowed Valentino to take his hand and pull him towards the louse’s lap.

“By putting up with me.” The pimp said with a smile, his voice a smooth timbre before taking on a playful lilt. “And by letting me feed you raw bacon bits on my lap?”

Alastor noticed him reaching down to the icebox under the seats and pulling out a platter. It had squares of raw bacon piled high on it, with a few small gizzards and livers dotted around the pile too. There were chocolate dipped strawberries too, on a different plate, but those were for Val. Alastor licked his lips at the sight of the meat.

“Well, if you’re going to twist my arm like this…”

He allowed himself to be positioned in Val’s lap and the louse speared through a liver with a fork, holding it up so Alastor could take it. He hummed happily again and the radio at the front of the limo switched to a slow jazz song that Alastor remembered lovers requesting often on his shows when he was alive. His hands were still entwined with his lover’s lower pair. He let himself relax, his shadow creeping up his legs and swirling around both him and Val. He pressed his head against Val’s chest and let the back of his head be enveloped in the fluff of that coat. He could feel something hard under the coat. The charm he’d given Val when Cora died. The fact that Val was indeed still wearing it made something warm curl in his chest. He knew that Valentino wasn’t… was comfortable with wearing parts of dead demons as Alastor was. The fact that Val would wear around a piece of Alastor's magic, a piece of him, it meant a lot.

Absolutely content, Alastor lost himself in the moment. The radio and the sound of Val shifting. The soft clinking of the fork on the plate and mouthfuls of savory meats. He was disappointed when Val straightened.

“We’re here.” Val nudged him gently. “Come on, babe. Up you get.”

Alastor was tempted to push his face into the fluff of Val’s collar and insist they stay. He was so comfortable, it almost felt like he could drift off to sleep. But he gathered his will and got out of the car. Val was excited for tonight and Alastor wanted to see what the louse had prepared.

He had expected a restaurant, or perhaps a flapper joint. Valentino liked to keep things within the realm that Alastor would understand for their surprise dates. He did not expect to step out of the car to soft grass and the sound of gently lapping water overlaid with the crooning of cicadas and frogs. 

Alastor blinked as he saw before him a winding maze of rivers lined by reeds, mangroves and willows. He sniffed delicately, and yes. That was saltwater.

Valentino had, somehow, in the middle of a city and in hell to boot, brought him to a bayou.

A pirogue was merrily floating off a small dock nearby and Val took his hands, leading him towards it. Alastor followed numbly. He had never, in all his time in hell, found anything even slightly resembling this. Not outside of his own illusions and makings. There were swamps and marshes enough, especially in the more rural areas of the wrath district, but those waters boiled with drowning sinners, all clambering and clinging to anything they could find as they searched for air and something to fight. Nothing like this peaceful, beautiful place.

“I had it landscaped.” Valentino said as he led Alastor down to the little boat, something akin to embarrassment in his voice. “Ages ago. When I first… noticed you. You talked about the swamps on the radio and I hoped… I hoped I could impress you with it.”

Alastor cocked his head. He knew, of course, that Valentino had been interested in him long before Alastor took notice, and even longer before Alastor would even think about letting Val within a foot of him. When Val had asked him on this date, he said he had been planning it for a long time, and now Alastor couldn’t help but wonder exactly  _ how _ long that was. 

Val let Alastor settle in the boat before getting in himself, more than ready to help if he needed it, but the deer demon stepped on elegantly with barely a rock of the boat. It was like a familiar dance, the soft swaying of the water under him and the sounds of the boat on the water. Val was not quite so graceful, nor did he fit as well as Alastor, but the Radio Demon sidled closer to his lover. Both to show affection and appreciation, and to center the boat’s gravity a bit better. Val’s upper arms worked the oars while the lower ones settled in Alastor’s lap. One of them boldly strayed up and gently, hesitantly, started petting Alastor’s ears. The deer demon allowed it, far more caught up in their surroundings than the touching.

The great ball of flame hell called a sun was setting and little dancing lights in the air glowed in the darkening air.

“Fireflies…” Alastor muttered, following the blinking path of a particular one with his eyes. “How did you-”

“I had them caught and brought down from the surface. Cost a pretty penny too, but you deserve the best. There’s a thriving population now.”

They lapsed into silence for a while, Alastor just taking in the scenery. If he didn’t know any better, if he couldn’t feel his magic thrumming in his veins and the warm presence of Val behind him, he might think he was back home. Exploring some previously unknown stretch of river like he did when he was a boy. Eventually he allowed his radio channels to swell a little louder again. He had been tamping them down for the ride over, content to enjoy the sounds of the swamp, but his signals did not like to be repressed and he wouldn’t be outdone, even if Val had a significant head start.

He sat up a little straighter to clear his airways and let his lungs expand. It was time, he thought, to show Val a little something he’d prepared. He was no composer, not professionally, but he could write a ditty or two if he pleased. He shifted his channels until he found the one he wanted, and then took it a step further by summoning his violin. He skilfully got to his feet without rocking the boat and turned to face Val, leaning back onto the bow of the boat and taking his bow in hand.

Valentino raised an eyebrow and Alastor smiled at him. Genuine and a tad mischievous, nothing like the ghastly grin others got treated to. He raised the instrument and started to play. Something soft and slow and romantic. He hadn’t played anything like this in years, and had certainly never written anything like it.

Never had anyone to write it for.

Alastor played as the boat cut through the water. Val seemed to have a destination in mind, so the deer demon just allowed himself to get lost in the music. He reached the end of the piece he composed and stared up some old melody his mother taught him. On it went and on they rowed and by the time Val was pulling the boat up to another dock, the sun was down and beams of heaven’s silverlight were shining through the trees, casting dappled patterns on the water.

Val directed the boat to the dock and tied it off, taking Alastor to a little nook under a willow tree where a basket already lay waiting, lights hanging from the tree’s branches. 

Alastor was once again floored by the sheer beauty of this place that Valentino had made for him.

They took a seat under the willow and Alastor leaned against the tree, watching Val as he laid out a blanket and set the wicker basket down on that.

“There’s food in here.” Val told him, gesturing at the basket. “But first I have a few things to say.”

Alastor shuffled closer, leaning into an embrace, showing he would listen to what the pimp would say.

“I didn’t fall in love with you expecting it to go anywhere,” Val started, entwining one of his hands with Alastor’s. “I didn’t even know it was anything other than the usual… craving.”

Alastor made a face at that but allowed Valentino to continue.

“You were everything I thought you would be, and yet nothing like I expected. You surpassed my expectations in every way, and every time I thought I couldn’t love you any more, you kept surprising me. I don’t care that you don’t want sex, I don’t care if you don’t want to go further; hell, if you decided to break it off tommorow, I would be heartbroken, but I would rather let you do that than contain you. You are a beautiful force of nature, a perfect storm, and I love you. I love you more than should be possible for a hellborn like me.”

Valentino leaned towards Alastor and pressed his face into Alastor’s hair, curling the three arms not occupied holding Alastor’s hand around the deer’s body.

”Happy anniversary, Alastor.” The louse breathed into Alastor’s hair, holding the Radio Demon close.

Alastor didn’t know what to say. He considered himself the one with ‘a way with words’ in this relationship. A dealmaker and a motormouth who had literally made a living off of running his mouth, he was never short on words. But this… This truly left him speechless. Valentino pulled away to look at Alastor, his face was framed by the lights hanging off the trees, in a beautiful landscape that he had built just for him. Alastor just stared at his lover dumbly for a few, long seconds.

“Al? Baby, you with me?”

Alastor was so overtaken with emotion in that moment that he didn’t know what to do other than surge forward and capture Valentino’s lips in a short but enthusiastic kiss.

~~~

Val was shocked for approximately half a second before instinct took over. Kissing was nothing new, and while the whole affair was actually quite chaste (there was no tongue or anything), it burned like fireworks because this was the first time Alastor had kissed him on the lips.

His hands found purchase in Alastor’s hair and on his shoulders and on his back, and usually he would be hesitant about caging alastor in but he couldn’t be concerned about that now because Alastor was kissing him,  _ Alastor _ was kissing  _ him _ , and it was _ amazing. _

The Radio Demon pulled away first, wiping at his mouth with a handkerchief and burning it in a burst of green fire when he seemed satisfied. He looked a little revolted at the saliva that had been clinging to his lips. Val wasn’t surprised and couldn’t even bring himself to be dissapointed. In the grand scheme of things, it was far from the most intense kiss he’d ever had, but it felt like someone had set off a barrel of gunpowder in his mouth and all his nerves were alight.

“Baby, that was-”

His voice was raspy and dazed, but cut off halfway through the sentence. His blissed out demeanor sudden;y shifted to one of focus. His eyes narrowed and his posture changed ever so slightly. 

He could feel eyes on them.

It was just a feeling, but Val had very good instincts. He scanned their surroundings.

“Valentino?”

Alastor was looking at him, concerned. Val put a hand on his knee and squeezed it gently. Alastor seemed to get the message that something was going on and subtly looked around as well. His shadow disappeared from under his feet and went out to scout.

It could just be some lowlife trespasser hoping for somewhere safe to hunker down for the night. It could also not be that, and neither of them came this far by taking chances like that.

Especially when they had another to protect.

It was just out of the corner of his eye that he saw it. Behind Alastor, the glimmer of a gun’s barrel. He looked closer and recognized the weasel from that fucking cartel that had killed Holly sitting behind the trigger of a rifle. His eyes widened and a lot of things suddenly happened at once.

Valentino had no idea which one of them the gin was pointed at but he wasn’t about to take chances. He pulled Alastor behind him and tried to pull them both to the ground. Alastor’s shadow spotted the weasel too, and launched for it. The weasel saw he had been spotted and pulled the trigger. A loud crack echoed through the air as the gun went off and a bullet went flying through the air, gleaming with holy light.

No more than a second or two of utter chaos, and then a deadly stillness.

And then a second, far more intense hell broke loose.

~~~

The air was filled with screaming. 

The shadow wasn’t capable of screaming, it didn;t really make sounds, but it would if it could. Everybody else was screaming. 

The squirmy demon under its claws was screaming as it ripped into it. Rip away the tendons and ligaments in the legs so it can’t run away. Pull on its spine and rip out its bones. Nothing deadly, not yet, but it didn’t have to be careful. Only The Master could really kill demons with bare teeth and claws. The shadow could rip and tear though, and so it would.

The master was screaming too, and it was much less attractive a sound. It was like something dying. It sounded like the screech of old magic meeting new. Worlds colliding, dimensions crumbling, and under it all a gut wrenching horror and anger and fear like the shadow had never known.

It could feel the emotions through the bond like acid in their veins. The wendigo was howling for blood and The Master was breaking into pieces. Noise screeched until the air broke apart and shattered like glass.

The lights in the trees burst in a shower of sparks and the fireflies flew away. Clouds that buzzed like static blocked out the moonlight and the swamp was plunged into darkness. That darkness was soon broken up with red and green sigils in the air, twisting and warping and  _ breaking _ the space around it until the whole, beautiful setting was caving in on itself, like a star being sucked into a black hole. The shadow shoved the weasel towards the center and watched it struggle to run on broken legs. It was dragged by thousands of tentacles towards The Master’s gnashing jaws, but it would not be eaten, the shadow knew.

The weasel would be dragged into the dimension within The Master, where the souls undeserving of rest were forced to be The Master’s captive audience. The laugh track, the applause, the booing and the cajoling tha master could summon, was all the product of thousands of trapped souls who had no control over their voices and actions. Only puppets to provide background noise.

The master was in the center of it all, the magic drawing everything in and spitting it out. Drained of life and colour, the world itself flickered like a bad picture. Growing and shifting incomprehensibly, The Master was curled over the still body of The Mate. The bullet wound in The Mate’s forehead a vicious mockery of the one on The Master’s.

The shadow approached, through the screaming. Trying to nudge The Mate awake. Trying to get him to move and laugh and look at them with love…

The Mate did not move. Red eyes stared up at nothing, empty and glassy. The shadow contorted its face into something beyond grief. An older body language forgotten by modern man. The only expression for a creature that could neither cry nor scream.

The Master’s screams continued to break the world around them. Break the world until it was broken as they were. The Wendigo devouring any wayward strand of magic that got too close. The power must be out across the city, but as The Master continued to scream and the hunger continued to spread, that would quickly stop being their biggest problem.

The shadow could do nothing but curl around the still shell of The Mate, its cold body enveloping  _ his _ cold body. To protect what was left. To keep him together and stop him from turning to ash.

It was all they could do now. 

Make sure he lasted till the end.

And there would be an end.

The Master would make it so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: TEMPORARY MAIN CHARACTER DEATH
> 
> You may have noticed that the tags include both 'Major Character Death' and 'Temporary Character Death'. Yes, in this chapter, one of the main characters of the series kicks the bucket. Not permanetly, and I promise within the next few chapters everything will be okay, but if this is something that might hurt you mentally, please make the correct desision for your mental state. I promise nobody is judging you.
> 
> Also, Ma puce is a french endearment that means (so I've been told) 'my flea'. I heard it and thought it both so funny and so fitting that it made it into my list of headcanons for these two


	11. Into The Abyss - Falling Apart Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Val meets a friend of Alastor’s who has a lot to say, but not necessarily the things Valentino wants to hear. Luckily, Alastor’s never made a habit of spending time around boring, or useless, people. This chatty bird might just be more than just hot air…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to take a moment to apologise for the sheer amount of lore dumping I do in this chapter. Cora is my little scientist and she likes to *know things.* She also likes to talk, so the people around her also end up knowing things. This chapter is p dialouge heavy and I'm sorry for that too. Anyways, I hope you guys like reading about this little lore I'm building, I do enjoy writing it.

Valentino had wondered what death was like, to an extent. To hellborns it was more of a novelty than a reality. Sinners had faced death once before and seemed to dislike the whole arrangement. They feared the unknown of it, Alastor had told him once. There were a lot of theories and nothing solid, no proof. Just a blind, mandatory plunge into the dark.

Valentino didn’t understand it then.

He understood it now.

There had been a split second where he had been terrified. It felt like he was falling. And then….

Well, there was nothing.

There was nothing. Just, endless nothing, stretching in all directions. Wherever he was there was neither light, nor dark. It was like being in the heaviest fog you could imagine, where everything around you was just solid grey. Even if he closed his eyes, there was no darkness. Only grey. 

Val kept walking. There were no footsteps, in fact, he was fairly certain there was nothing under his feet. He kept up the motion of walking, but did not, in fact, even know if he was moving. He had given up looking around, there was nothing to see. He wasn’t even sure he had a body anymore. When he looked down at himself, it seemed blurry, indistinct. He had no idea how long he had been here. 

The temperature was neither hot nor cold. There were no scents or tastes in the air. There was no wind, nor sound. 

The silence was crushing.

The only change came from periodic bursts where the grey would flash alarmingly, darkening and lightening up like lightning crashing through clouds. It always seemed to be in the distance, coming from some unknown source. With it came rumbling like thunder. If everything weren’t so fucking calm in between the bursts, Val would think himself in a thundercloud.

As it was, Valentino was simply left to wander, alone with his thoughts. Thoughts like… Alastor.

His business, his belongings, his territory. He had a will, every overlord did, leaving most of his things among Vox, Velvet, and Alastor. He even, in a recent addition to the document, had requested Angel Dust’s contract be burned. He hadn't used it in ages, unable to force the spider into doing anything without bringing the princess down on his ass. That being said, Angel Cakes had served him well, and he kept him around more out of a sick sentiment than profit these days.

He thought of these other things, in passing. But this thoughts always returned to his Alastor.

Would Alastor miss him? Would Alastor grieve? He couldn’t help but hope so. The deer had a different way of emoting, a different way of communicating. Alastor might not have even let his smile falter once he saw Valentino was dead. Some selfish part of him hoped that he warrarented those rare tears Alastor shed so sparingly. Although… The thought of Alastor crying over his body, that golden smile wavering and cracking as his love tried to keep a brave face.. That hurt so much more than the thought of Alastor not grieving him, so maybe not.

As he walked, or maybe didn’t walk, he still couldn’t tell, he tried to commit some things to memory. The shape of Alastor’s face, the colour of his eyes, the lines of his body. The sound of his voice… Satan, he missed Alastor’s voice. The silence here was unbearable. It was never silent around Alastor, because Alastor couldn’t stand silence. Things were never quiet, never boring….

He would hate this place.

He tried to cling to a picture of Alastor in his mind. It wasn’t exactly a crystal clear one, not anymore. He clenched his fist and wondered if this was some form of ‘sinner’s amnesia’. Many sinners talked about… losing their lives as they lived in hell for more and more time. The everyday moments slipped away the longer they stayed in hell. Only memories that related to their sins and their deaths remained, the others slowly drifting away. Turning them into shades, beasts of terrible power with no direction or control. It didn’t happen to everyone, and the process took literally thousands of years, but Valentino had seen it happen.

Was it simply a side effect of death? Something that could happen to an unlucky hellborn too?

He didn’t know.

Another roll of thunder and he closed his eyes. No need to watch where he was going after all, and imagined Alastor. He tried to remember the song he’d played on the boat ride to the picnic site. It felt like an eternity ago, that had happened. He tried to remember the expression Alastor had on his face when he played and the way his slender fingers moved on the fingerboard. He lost himself in trying to reconstruct a picture in his head. Trying to remember the curve of his nose and the mischief in his smile. The magnitude of his power and the softness that existed past it all, if someone was allowed in.

Would Alastor allow anyone else to see the side of him Val had seen? Now that he was gone, would the Alastor Val knew, a lover and nurturer, go forevermore unknown?

The pimp’s chest ached.

He didn’t deserve Alastor, and he knew it, but he had planned on enjoying it for all it was worth until Alastor was sick of him… He wasn’t supposed to get pulled away! It wasn’t fair.

He didn’t want this! 

He didn’t want to be dead. He wanted to be with Alastor. They still had so many things left to do… He wanted to see Alastor smile, he wanted to make him laugh, he wanted to spend eternity with him.

Not eternity here, alone-

“Oi! Wake up!”

Val jolted when an abrasive voice snapped at him, pulling him out of his thoughts. He reeled and looked around, before looking down and seeing… Something.

He squinted, as if that would clear his vision, but it didn’t really help. What he was looking at was much, much shorter than he was, and kind of… amorphous. Shifting and changing , it was like he couldn’t quite focus on one aspect of it without it changing. Its body seemed as blurry around the edges as his did, and its features seemed to blend from a young woman with black hair to something with feathers and a beak and back again. A crow? A raven? Something along those lines. Any time he tried to look at any one feature, it slipped away into something else. It was like an optical illusion or some shit. Eventually he gave up on trying to make sense of it and simply asked:

“Are you real?”

“As real as anything in this place.” The creature replied. It’s voice was loud in the silence, and sounded two toned. Like to people speaking at once in perfect sync. One was fairly average, if a bit low, the other was almost like the croning of a bird or something, which would explain the beak it seemed to have half the time. “Although the fact we can interact with each other is very fucking strange. You didn’t happen to die with anything of magical significance on you, did you?”

It moved forward, not waiting for an answer as it started looking over Val’s coat and checking his pockets with no regard for anything like personal space or privacy.

“Wha- hey!”

He shoved the creature away and it landed daintily on long taloned feet that shifted to bare human feet a few milliseconds later. It raised an eyebrow, unimpressed by Val’s indignance.

“Well, did you?”

“Now listen here you little-”

The creature was still searching him, flapping its wings a few times and literally scaled Val before rummaging in the fluff of his collar and grabbing something around his neck. It made a triumphant noise. Val reached up and grabbed what constituted for it’s leg, throwing it away from him. It landed with less grace this time, clutching what Val recognised to be the charm that Alastor had given him. He didn’t even realise he still had it. The creature was looking at it with a look that bordered wonder and greed. Ignoring him in favor of dancing around with the amulet. It was examining the feathers on it and grinning, taking at speeds that Val suspected would have made even Alastor’s head spin.

“Oh, oh it makes perfect sense! They act as an anchor point, and once they slowed down to this frequency the soul began to self heal, dragging the remnants towards it, and absorbing anything else into its pull! No wonder the bodies dematerialize, the dimensions would literally collide if they didn’t! I could-”

Val growled.

No way was he letting this thing run off with the only connection he had with Alastor.

He stormed forward and grabbed the creature by the back of its neck, hoisting it up to his eye level and snatching the charm back.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He snarled. “If you think you can steal from me, twice dead or not, you have another thing coming!”

The creature squawked in alarm. Apparently it had totally forgotten he was here until he had lifted it. It wriggled in his grip and suddenly struck him with a filthy glare, wild with anger, as well as something deeper and angier, before it was gone. Replaced with annoyance, but not the hissing and manic malace from before.

“Hey! Put me down! Do you want my help or not?”

Okay, Val was officially fucking lost, and a little pissed. He dropped the creature, grit his teeth, and rubbed his forehead.

“I didn’t know that was on the table, because you accosted me before you told me your fucking name. And why the fuck should I want your help?”

“You want a name?” The creature asked, getting to its feet. “Fine.”

The creature smiled at him, which was an odd thing to say when it’s mouth was at least half beak. A flash of lightning made the shadows to strange things and there was something distinctly wrong about all of this. The smile was more sharp than friendly, Val instantly got the impression that he was always going to be a few facts behind whatever this is.

Fuck his life.

Well… death.

“I’m Cora.” The creature, Cora, told him. “And you’re Valentino.”

Another flash of lightning and hey, were they getting closer together? Cora’s expression changed a little as it happened and when Val looked back at it, her, her face was firmer with resolve. 

“And I need to get you back to where you came from before your boyfriend breaks the universe.”

~~~

“You can get me back?”

“Yup. Well… I think so. Probably. Maybe. Fifty percent. Maybe forty-five. Forty-three.”

“Those… Don’t sound like great odds.”

“They aren’t. But considering what will happen if we don’t, we kind of need to take that chance.”

Val made a face. 

“How though?”

Cora pointed at the amulet. 

“With that. It led you to me, and me to you, because those are my feathers. You shouldn’t have been able to find anyone here, we’re supposed to be alone. They must have led you through a crack or something. Souls want to be whole, and they pull at pieces of themselves. Usually, our bodies turn to ash or decompose when we die, but these have been preserved to last somehow. This isn’t all of the feathers he took, I can feel the missing ones. We can use the forces trying to pull the rest of the feathers to me, and use them to launch you back. I couldn’t do it when it was just me here, but with this bound to Alastor’s magic, it’s essentially a rope hanging down.”

Val blinked. That made sense… kinda. She had sort of sped up about halfway through the sentence, words spilling out of her mismatched mouth faster than Val could really catch up. He’d gotten better at keeping up with motormouths since dating Alastor, but damn this girl could talk.

“So… why aren’t we doing that?”

He asked.

“Insufficient energy, or I could have used those forces to get back myself. Luckily…” She gestured around. “We seem due for a big old kick start soon enough. We just need to wait for a big enough magical boost.”

“Didn’t you say that doing this quickly was important?”

“Slower vibrations, remember? Hours here are milliseconds up there.”

The louse grimaced.

Waiting.

With a loudmouth chatterbox that  _ wasn’t _ his boyfriend.

_ Great. _

~~~

“So, explain it again? Because I’m still not getting you.”

Cora, Alastor’s dead friend because that was just Val’s life somehow, flicked her tail feathers and they turned into the skirt of a dress halfway through the motion. Val tried not to get annoyed. Once he had finally gotten Cora to calm down about the amulet (chattering on about magical anchors and the penetrative nature of soul frequencies, whatever those were) and actually fill him in, she had launched into an explanation that was about 70 percent scientific jargon, and even the parts that weren’t sounded complex. He didn’t like being in the dark, but damn it, it was like the bird was speaking a whole other language.

“So-”

“And  _ slowly.” _

Cora made a slightly put upon noise, but to her credit, did take a breath and start talking slower.

“To put it  _ very _ simply, the universe is made up of a bastardization of science and magic.” 

Cora explained, clearly focusing on maintaining a slow pace. 

“All the dimensions in existence occupy more or less the same space, vibrating at different frequencies, and when you die, the part of you that is actually ‘alive’ slows right down and you shift dimensions, stripping down the less ‘necessary’ parts of your being the slower you go.”

She paced as she talked. It was sort of like watching Alastor when he was on a roll, but less pun riddled. He could see why the two of them got along, although he wasn’t sure how either of them got a word in edgewise with each other.

“In terms of frequency, Heaven sits at the highest. When angels fall from Heaven, I theorize that God slows the vibration of their forms, but not their grace, which gets dragged down with them, hence why it’s so unstable- I’m still not entirely sure why they fall, it might have something to do with that wormhole that lets us see heaven from Hell’s sky and the souls taking the path of least resistance-”

She was getting sidetracked again.

“Cora. Focus.”

The crow/human monstrosity had the grace to look sheepish.

“Sorry.”

“So heaven is the highest?”

“Yup. Then the mortal world. Then Hell. Then this, The Abyss. And then wherever we go after we fade away here, I guess. There are also other places that sit between all of this with slightly different pitches. Where different wellsprings of magic come from.”

“Like Alastor’s voodoo?”

Cora nodded.

“And pagan rituals, and polytheisic prayers.”

Val took a moment to process this before nodding. That had been much easier to follow than the past few attempts at an explanation.

“Okay… But why do you keep going on about Alastor destroying the universe? He’s powerful, but he’s not…  _ that _ powerful.”

Cora made a chattering noise and tossed her head in a distinctly bird-like gesture.

“You’re right, he  _ is  _ powerful. Why do you think that is?”

“What?”

“Why do you think Alastor is powerful?”

“He… got lucky.”

That’s what it was, right? Luck. Plenty of clever minds had put their heads to the patterns that dictated demon form and power levels, and hadn’t come up with anything more elaborate than the universe having a sick sense of humour.

“He can summon eldritch horrors, pop in and out of existence, pull matter out of nowhere… In fact, they seem damn near limitless. Don’t you think that’s a weird skillset for someone who’s powers revolve around a radio?”

Val cocked his head. He’d… never really thought about that before.

“He practices magic… And he has the wendigo.”

“Yes! And his shadow. Literally three beings occupying the same body at the same time, reacting to different magical stimuli!”

She was looking at him like he was supposed to be drawing a conclusion here. Val was still not getting it.

“So?”

“ _ So, _ remember when I told you that the universe was made up of a mishmash of vibration, wave, and pitch based science and magic? Doesn’t that particular array of things sound familiar? Alastor already had his fingers in a lot of pies when he dropped in, with the wendigo and the magic. Lots of links to other pitches and doorways. Add to that, his powers literally gave him domain over frequency and pitch.”

“Are you telling me that Alastor’s… what, a… a god?”

“I don’t know what he is. I don’t- I don’t think he’s a  _ god. _ I just know that he’s special.” Cora suddenly seemed to lose her energy and flopped down to sit. Val cocked his head in confusion. Cora looked up at him. She looked tired. Another rumble of thunder crashed all around them and she frowned.

“What happened?” She asked him. It lacked the zeal she’d had only seconds ago. Valentino was unsure of this sudden tonal shift. “This wasn’t happening before, and it feels… like him. I’m sure it has something to do with you being here, but-”

She broke off. Val didn’t know what to say. Was she saying that this… Thunder. This power that could apparently transcend dimensions… Was Alastor? He… didn’t know what to make of that. She said she didn’t think Alastor was a god, but that seemed pretty godlike to him. 

They just sat opposite each other for a while before Val spoke up.

“I just died. That’s all. I think I got shot.”

“That’s all?”

“I mean, Al was there. If it changes anything.”

Valentino was not made privy to whether or not it, in fact, changed anything. Cora went quiet for a few minutes. Both of them sat in the empty void, with only the rumbling of thunder for company.

~~~

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but what the fuck is wring with your face? And the rest of you, for that matter.”

After Cora’s bombshell of a revelation, they had sat in silence for a while. Cora was clearly very bored. She moved every few seconds and had started muttering something, He had no idea what she was saying, but if his linguistic knowledge was up to snuff, he was pretty sure it was in Dutch.

“What do you mean?”

She asked, looking at him with one eye open.

“You’re all… shifty.”

She looked down at herself. As she did so, her hair disappeared into a mass of black feathers.

“Oh… I guess it- The human is what I… used to look like. When I was alive. And the crow is what I looked like as a demon. I guess it can’t decide which one is… me” She frowned. “I guess I didn’t think about it, but now that you mention it, it is odd. I wonder if the mindset has anything to do with that, or if it’s purely the forms the soul has taken.”

“I’m not doing that, am I?”

He asked, wondering if he had somehow not noticed him shapeshifting. She shook her head.

“No.”

“Well, I was never human. So I guess that makes sense.”

She hummed, a thoughtful look on her face.

~~~

Val’s inquiry had morphed into a game of twenty questions. Something to kill time. He had discovered that Cora came from Holland and had travelled to England on foot when she was seventeen after being kicked out of the house for refusing to get married to the man her parents wanted her to.

“Damn, that’s hardcore.” Val told her, fiddling with his sunglasses. He was so damn glad he still had them, he was a nightmare without something to play with. It was why he carried a cane. “Mommy and daddy did ya dirty, huh?”

“You could say that. Fuck em though, I don’t need them.”

Val was no stranger to parental issues. He had no parents himself but more than a few of his whores had ended up in the business because of their parents one way or the other, Angel being a notable example.

Cora looked over at him.

“So what’s your story then? I mean, I know a lot about you already. I did my research when you started dating Alastor, but one thing I’ve always wondered… Why porn?”

Val blinked. That… wasn’t what he had expected at all.

“Why not?”

“No reason I guess… But very few hellborns start businesses, they typically don’t need to to get power.”

Val shrugged.

“I wanted to surround myself with beautiful people, so I did. Then someone offered me a lot of money to borrow one for the night. It kinda snowballed from there. I like money and I like sex. Not much more to it than that.”

“You like sex, but you’re dating Alastor?”

Cora’s eyebrow was raised and she was looking at him critically. Val got the impression that the way he answered the silent query was going to be thoroughly judged. He couldn’t help but be a little nervous. This was someone whose opinion Alastor held at standard. If this went to plan, she might tell him Val wasn’t good enough. Would Alastor take her word over his? Who would he choose-

He decided to answer honestly.

“I love him more. I haven’t asked for sex from him, and I never will. If he wants it, I won’t complain. But his comfort comes first for me. Always.”

She hummed and tipped her head back into what he had quickly learned was her thinking position. Sitting with her arms propping her up and her head tipped towards were the sky would be in this empty world.

“Good answer.” She said eventually. “I’m glad Alastor didn’t listen to me. He deserves people who love him. Needs them, even.”

Val made a face in confusion. Didn’t listen?

“What do you mean?”

She chuckled.

“I didn’t like him dating you. When you started pursuing him, I told him he should kill you before he got hurt, and then when he said he was giving you a chance, I was ready to do it myself.” She huffed another laugh. “I probably would have failed, but I was willing to try. I didn't trust you not to… be pushy.”

The insinuation that he would force- 

“Never.”

“Another good answer.”

~~~

“Do you know where he dropped down?” She asked him suddenly. “Has he told you?”

The district Alastor had landed in? The deer had never told him explicitly, but it was an easy guess.

“The gluttony district?”

“Gluttony something, that’s for sure.” The crow scoffed. “He dropped down in the  _ palace kitchens. _ That’s how he knows the king. Lucifer was literally the first person Alastor met down here.”

Val blinked. He knew that Alastor knew the king, and that they were on amenable, if not friendly terms, but he hadn’t known that. He narrowed his eyes at the other creature, suddenly feeling a bit insecure about just how little he seemed to know about Alastor in comparison.

“How the fuck do you know all this?” He snapped. “Why didn’t he tell me? I-”

Cora actually looked somewhat sympathetic as he sneered at her. It just pissed him off more, but he didn’t attack her again. What would be the point? He needed her help anyways.

“Same reason I went to hell,” She said quietly, cautiously. “It's hard to keep information from me, I ask too many questions. Alastor isn’t naturally an open book, I’m just… persistent.” 

“Yeah, I noticed.”

She chuckled, a tad mirthlessly, and leaned back. They were both more floating than sitting, so she was simply suspended on her back, like she was leaning in a hammock

“He couldn’t keep secrets from me, especially not after I realized how damn important he was on a wider scale. He became a hyperfixation, tied into my studies of the universe. Annoyed the shit out of him, at first, but I think he enjoyed having a confidant after a while. He talked to me about his troubles less, when he started dating you, but I like to think we were actual friends by that point.”

She looked sort of sad. Val remembered what she said about time differences in this place and wondered how long it had been for her. It had been almost three months since she had died. How long had she been here? He remembered thinking that Alastor would have hated this place. He suspected Cora hated it too.

“He was sad when you died.” Val said on impulse. “He misses you. So I think you were definitely his friend.”

She smiled at that. The smile looked sad, and there was an element of loathing in it too. Like she was angry at something. 

“Well he’s literally tearing apart the universe for you, so I would say he misses you even more.”

~~~

“-Okay, and get this. He launches himself over the fence and gets his tails caught in the railing. He teleported himself down, but I know what I saw.”

“Sto- stop, god I can’t breathe…” Cora screeched with laughter, shifting face brightening. She held her sides and gasped, tears running down her face. “I’ve never actually seen him get caught… Oh christ...”

Val grinned at the appreciative reaction. The two of them had started sharing stories about Alastor to try and lighten the mood that had hung itself over their heads. The past twenty years had given Val more than enough funny stories to tell, and after god knows how long in isolation within the abyss, Cora was a good audience.

“He can be such a dork…” 

Cora sighed, trying to tame her giggles. Her eyes were curved in mirth, shifting between deep black and ice blue.

“Oh yeah, and that’s not even mentioning the incident with the alligators….”

“Oh? Do tell.”

~~~

Val had no idea how long it had been when Cora suddenly went ramrod straight. She looked around and stood quickly. Val couldn’t see what she was reacting to. The thunder had almost become a low, constant rumbling at this point, but nothing had changed from his perspective...

“That’s our que.” She said, holding out her hand. “I need the charm to send you back.”

Val reluctantly took the amulet off of his neck and handed it over. He didn’t know what he was doing. Part of him said it was stupid to throw himself and his safety into the hands of this stranger. But he had to get back to Alastor. He had to. If it was between being without him and risking his life, even with a minute chance of success? There was no contest. Besides, ver the past… God knows how long, he’d gotten to know her. In all her loudmouthed, fast talking glory… and she cared about Alastor.

That would have to be enough of a first impression.

“Be careful with it… I want to keep it, if I can…”

Cora’s eyes went a little darker when he said that and she turned away. Her hands were shaking a little and he frowned in concern.

“Are you okay?”

She shook her head. 

“I’m fine. We have to wait for the right time. Stand back.”

Val did so. She stared at him for a long moment and looked like she wanted to say something.

“What?”

She looked conflicted before stammering.

“It- It was nice to meet you. That’s all.”

He frowned.

“You say that like we aren’t both going back.” 

He said, aming for lightheartedness and missing it. This whole situation was tense and neither of them could quite fall into the patterns of banter.

She didn’t respond to that and instead started muttering to herself. It sounded like equations. Val listened as they grew more and more complicated and sounded like her voice grew thick. He reached out, but she stepped away. Her shaking got more intense and after a few minutes it was making her shoulders tremble. He heard her whisper something that sounded worryingly like ‘fuckshitfuck…’ and he stepped forward again.

“What’s wrong?”

He asked, worried something was going badly. She turned back to look at him and he saw that she was crying. Tears running down her face and making her eyes red.

“Damn you, Valentino.” She said shakily. “Damn you to hell.”

She looked like she was in pain. Val felt panic curling in his chest. Something cold and slow creeping through his veins and making it hard to breathe.

“What’s going on?” He asked her. “What-”

She shoved her hand towards his chest and forced the amulet into her hands.

“I don’t-”

“Just fucking take it! Damn you and the fact you love him so much…”

“But you said-”

“I fucking lied. Now go!”

He stumbled when she pushed him, even with their differing heights. He stumbled backwards and realized some sort of gateway had opened behind him. It was black and jagged, like the world had been slashed with a knife. He could feel it pulling on him, sucking him towards it. He actually lost his footing and almost fell in, but he reached out and grabbed her wrist. She was… weirdly unmoving, considering she must also have the portal pulling on her, and Val was quite a measure heavier.

“But wait, aren’t you coming?”

“Someone has to be an anchor here or the wormhole collapses. I was gonna-” She hesitated and Val’s veins turned to ice. She was going to- what? He suspected he knew. “But that doesn’t matter now.”

She put her other hand on the two of his that he had grabbed her wrist with.

“Take care of him for me.”

She pried his fingers off. Again, strangely strong for someone her size.

He didn’t have time to say anything else before he disappeared into the inky blackness.

And then…

He woke to chaos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whhhoooo BOY this one got long. I really like it though. Bit... lore heavy. But i love me some world building, and there isn't much action to be had in the abyss, so talking galore.
> 
> Hope yall enjoyed, please tell me what you think!


	12. The Minor Fall - Falling Apart Part 2 1/2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alastor’s grief has turned him into a danger to the entirety of hell, and whether or not he’s worth saving must be ruminated. 
> 
> The king of Hell ponders

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short little thing before the action really starts rolling, and a glipse into whatever the hell has been going on while Val and Cora chinwag.

Lucifer ran a finger up and down his quill as he stared out of the window of the tallest tower in the palace. He usually liked being close to the sky, but right now it was cloying with something ancient and terrible.

Last night, tendrils of black magic had erupted from an epicenter in the lust district, consuming any and everything it touched. Overhead was a storm that rattled the sky with magical and technological interference. 

He recognised both.

He knew this day would come, but he hadn’t expected it nearly so soon. Alastor was the result of some hilariously specific circumstances and in his making, the universe had found itself a great big, and adequately red, self-destruct button. Lucifer was innately entertained by the concept, and Alastor himself wasn’t a half bad fellow either. They had the same sense of humor. But he had always known that there would be a day that Alastor spiralled out of control and ended everything. There was something distinctly primal about Alastor, but he was still very much, for all the nuances of the word, sound. Not sane, certainly not, nor entirely ‘human’, but composed enough to keep his more… menacing potential in check. He had even, in the past few decades, been something approaching stable, so he had not been expecting this day to come for quite some time. He had expected it to be the day when Alastor’s hunger grew too great and he destroyed himself, eating his physicality and letting his magic rip the universe apart with nothing to bind it. 

He looked out the window again. Black magic like the void snaked out like a flood into the streets. Demons, cars, and even skyscrapers vanished into the swirling, writhing mass. A platoon of royal guard forces had already been lost to it. They had gone in armed to the tooth with angelic weapons, but the forces were not entirely unholy and the entire squad had vanished without a hide nor hair to be seen. Lucifer knew that if he wanted this dealt with, truly  _ dealt with _ , he would have to go in and do it himself.

The question now was did he need to? 

The magic showed no sign of stopping. Relying on Alastor to come to his senses was not something that could be done, and nobody knew what had set the deer demon off, so nobody could fix it. At times like this, Lucifer would turn to those who might know something, but nobody was turning up. Overlord Rosie knew nothing, Alastor’s pest of a crow friend had died in the latest extermination, Valentino had not appeared since Alastor’s attack began. He was… reluctant to ask Charlotte, his little girl whom he had done so dirty… He had never been good at swallowing his pride.

The only option he had left was-

Lucifer sighed, a strange emotion for his… - friend? Companion? More? Less? -welling up. 

He was not used to this. His heart ached the same day it did when he left his dearest Lilith with Adam and returned to Heaven. The day  _ He  _ cast him out. When his beloved Charlotte left with her dream, both tears and hellfire in her eyes. 

He summoned his cane. An earsplitting roar echoed across the skyline, distorted by static. In the street another skyscraper fell and the corrosive magic inched closer to the palace. The whole lust district was gone, the wrath district on it’s way to being devoured. Even if Alastor was stopped, Hell had seen a significant death toll today, putting the exterminations to shame

The cane elongated in his hands and was sparked aflame. Few knew he still had this, and even fewer left with the knowledge rather than being incinerated with holy fire.

He didn’t want to have to do this, but he would if he must.

Alastor had many tactical benefits to keep around. A secret weapon against heaven, something they wouldn’t see coming. A discrete last resort to deal with issues that the crown couldn’t be seen dealing with through a public lens. An unofficial and incredibly belatedly appointed godfather to his daughter.

A friend.

Even so, as little as he cared about the suffering of his citizens, this was a kingdom he’d built for himself and he wouldn’t stand for it’s destruction. Even if that meant ending someone who… meant something to him.

He planted one foot against the sill of the window and launched himself out of it, spreading his wings and letting them catch Hell’s warm winds. He soared over the cityscape and, flaming sword in hand, headed towards the center of the corrosive magic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure if I like this one, but oh well. Hopefully the next one should have a lot more action, and a reunion... 
> 
> Hopefully. 
> 
> :)


	13. Till Death Do Us Part - Falling Apart Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Val comes home, but not all is well back in Hell. Val must prove that Alastor can be saved from the edge of self-destruction, with the threat of taking the whole universe with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was a doozy to write, ladies, gents, and all in between. Longest chapter by far.
> 
> If the glitchy text it too difficult to read, there is a transcript in the end notes. I haven't found issues with reading it, but you never know.

It sounded like he was in the centre of a tornado. A tornado full of harpies and sirens. With megaphones. After the oppressive silence of the void, it was almost painful.

Val actually couldn’t see much, everywhere around him was a mess of low red light and black. A different sort of emptiness to the void. His eyes stung as they were buffeted with harsh winds and he was almost knocked on his ass with the sheer force of gravity pressing on him. He didn’t know if it was a side effect of coming back from the void or if the amount of power in the air was physically pushing him to the ground.

Where  _ was _ he?

He looked around again, eyes squinted against the wind. He brought a hand up to sheild his face. Where were his glasses? He thought he had them before. Oh well.

In the dark, his eyes landed on slits of blue against the black. The shadow seemed to bend around these places, become thicker, even in the darkness of his surroundings. A sharp, Jagged mouth dripping with oily shadow. The shapes were… familiar, but there was something warped about them, They seemed more… real now than he had ever seen them before.

Looking Alastor’s shadow in the face was like staring at someone through a veil. There was this element of intangibility to it. Even though it could touch you, bite you, strangle you, you always got the sense it was on a different plain to you. That there was some uncrossable distance between you and it.

Now, Val felt like it was close enough to touch.

He opened his mouth to call, but the winds filled his mouth with something foul tasting. It tasted like gasoline, coating the inside of his mouth. 

It reminded him of that time he had decided to be cheeky and nip at the shadow’s neck.

Was- Was he  _ inside? _

Huh. For someone who wasn’t down for fucking, al seemed to end up inside of Alastor quite a bit.

He headed towards the blue shapes given it was the only thing he could really make out. They seemed bigger up close. He reached out a hand and went to touch the shapes. They seemed to almost flinch under his touch. Dissolving into mist around him before reforming. This time they were looking at him instead of past him.

All of a sudden the world around him seemed to literally dissolve. He found himself somewhere no less noisy, but not in the same way. Less like screaming and howling wind, and more like deep, grinding sounds and the sharp white noise of static. The air tasted of blood. There was… something. Huge and unexplainable above him. It was like the sky was moving. A boiling mass of sludge, a writhing mass of tentacles, a rolling stormcloud… Some ungod;y combination of the three. It was almost more of a presence than an object. 

Val was cut from his musings when he found himself spun by cold hands.

Alastor’s shadow was holding him at arm’s length, looking at him with utter disbelief. It was almost comical. Val waved awkwardly.

“Hi.”

The shadow’s face suddenly stiffened up, shutting down and snarling. It shook its head like it was trying to clear it’s head. It’s form warped. It kept dissolving and reforming, like it was having trouble staying together. The shadow looked up at the sky just as there was a bright flash of light.

The shadow let out a silent wail and the world shook with a terrible scream.

Literally shook. Val lost his balance at the resulting earthquake.

He reached out to the shadow, calling for it.

“Hey, wait, it’s okay. What’s happening?”

The shadow glanced at him again, almost longing, before it turned away from him and melted back into the chaos. There was another flash and Val finally saw the black mass above him shift a little. The hell sky was dark with storm clouds rippling with lightning and raining ash. He caught a glimpse of it as the mass above him shied away from the light before surging towards it, clearly trying to snuff it out.

The light burned Val’s eyes, even with the darkness pressing in.

Holy light, it must be.

What was going on here?

There were a few more flashes, and then the light abruptly changed course. Val’s eyes widened as the light changed from a glowing ball to a figure. Shrinking and condensing and finally dulling from a painfully bright light to a white streak in the sky, and headed right towards him.

Val got his bearings too late to try and run and suddenly he was off the ground. His top two arms in the string grip of a person a great deal smaller than him, but seemed to have no trouble holding on. Wingbeats boomed around him, like thunder in their proximity.

He looked up.

He was being flown, whisked away, by the king of hell himself.

As if this day couldn’t get any weirder.

~~~

“So… let me get this straight, your majesty.” Val said, looking away from the king to gesture out the window at the towering column of seeping magic.  _ “That’s Alastor?” _

“Yup!” The king chirped, a mouthful of turkish delight making his voice sticky. “Suddenly blew up last night.”

Last night? But Val felt like-

Well, Cora  _ had _ said there would be a time difference. But it felt like so much longer…

Val looked out of the window of the palace tower. The great magic spire looked like a tornado, a whirling storm of dark magic, dust, and terror, if terror had an appearance. Around it, everything was in ruins. The lust district was gone. Buried under layers of primordial ooze, writhing eldritch shadows, and corrosive magic. 

He couldn’t even see his building.

He tried to swallow down the lump in his throat at the sight of literally everything he held dear falling apart.

“Sucks to be you at the moment.” The king informed him cheerily, inspecting his cane and swinging it around like a baton. The angel walked up to the window to stare out with him, tracking Val’s gaze. “But if it makes you feel any better, everyone else is in the same boat! Alastor’s a threat to the whole universe like this. He’s literally shaking the foundations of reality apart.”

Val’s eyes narrowed, lips pulling back to show teeth. Lucifer seemed unperturbed. Valentino was treated to a wide smile and eyes alight with crazed happiness.

“What are you saying?” 

“I’m saying that any and all attempts to pacify him have failed, and it’s time to consider other options.”

Val really didn’t like the sound of that. The fallen angel’s happy tone just served to push his buttons and Val couldn’t just stand aside, king or not.

“So what, you’re just gonna kill him?” 

He asked incredulously. A swelling of rage and panic was building up. He couldn’t. Val wouldn’t let him. He hadn’t come all the way back just to be too late. Alastor could still be reached, he knew it. He just needed the right push… They couldn’t kill him. Not even Lucifer...

“I’m going to  _ try.” _ The king replied, a manic giggle bubbling forth. “No guarantee that even  _ I’ll  _ succeed at this point. But this is my kingdom, I built it with my wife, and I’ll not let anyone blast it to oblivion, not even a... friend.”

He spoke with seemingly unbridled glee, but the last word was said with hesitance and Valentino looked at the fallen angel closer. There was a tightness in his posture, a tiredness in his face that was highly uncharacteristic of the king of hell, who usually didn’t seem to give a single damn about anything. Content to watch the world burn. Tackling life with a giddy smile, a goofy attitude, and absolutely no fucks given.

This was not that person. Not right now.

This was, all silly behaviour aside, a leader who had made a call about what he was prioritizing.

Individual over bigger picture.

It made his blood run cold, mostly because he could see where the king was coming from.

Valentino was a business owner, a business owner in  _ hell _ of all places, and no stranger to making hard decisions for the sake of the business. Letting whores go, or putting them down, sacrificing time and people for the sake of keeping his monopoly. He thought back to times where he’d had stars begging; literally on their knees to keep their jobs, or their lives, in other cases. He’d looked down at them from his desk and all he’d seen was a wrench in the works of his work, gumming up the system. He’d been fond of some of them, don’t get him wrong, but the business came first. Sometimes he’d even had people close to the person in question come in and vouch for them, even offering their own additional services. He’d looked down at them too, and thought how pathetic it was that they would beg for someone else, someone who, on occasion, had it coming.

Oh, how the tables had turned.

“Don’t.” He croaked out. It was all he could think to say. “Please- I need- Just let me try…”

Lucifer looked back at him and there was something just a tad more genuine in that face. Just for a second. It gave Val hope, if only a little.

“Armies were sent in and didn’t even get close. Poof! Gone, like cotton candy when you lick it. What makes you think you’ll do better? The magic just… gobbles you up! Anything that comes into contact with it.”

“I was right in the middle of it for a while, and I’m still here!” Val protested. “Maybe... some part of him recognises me?”

At that, Lucifer’s eyes widened. He let out a loud laugh, full of mirth, and leaned on his cane.

“Oh, you- you are a riot! I can see why Alastor keeps you around! Haha!”

The fallen angel was gripped by hysterics for a few more minutes before wiping away a tear. 

“Oh, you slay me.” The king sighed, before smiling widely. “Fine! Do as you wish. But know that I’m going to go for it if you don’t come back in a few minutes. Off you pop!”

The king waved his hand and suddenly Val was back where he was before the king had picked him up.

“Okay, um… okay.”

Val froze for a second as he realised that he… didn’t really have a plan. The mass that was, apparently, Alastor didn’t really seem to be paying any attention to him. Looking around, he was standing in the only place where the corrosive magic wasn’t eating. The epicentre. The eye of the storm. Walls of smoke like magic, thick and dark, swirled around him. It wailed like wind ripping down trees.

He remembered the shadow disappearing into the blackness… Should he follow it? Could he?

_ Armies were sent out…  _

He remembered what Lucifer said… It was probably a bad idea.

But it was the only one he had.

He had no sense of bearings, which way the shadow went. He would just have to hope the direction didn’t matter.

He held his breath and ran.

Hopefully some part of Al would still be cognizant enough to protect him.

~~~

Val gasped when he entered the magic, and then choked on it. It was like chugging acid and washing it down with sand. His skin was burning in it, his eyes watering. Fuck, he missed his glasses. He was so sure he had them before…

Regardless, he pressed on. He searched as best he could, pushing against the whirling forces and searching for something he could actually interact with.

_ Water was pouring off him in rivlets, but he didn’t give a damn… Lightning flashed and he was blinded. He blinked frantically to clear it. He needed to see, needed to find him- _

He was suddenly hit with a memory of another time he had wandered out into a storm looking for Alastor. Wading through rain and flooding, unable to see.

Alastor had found him instead.

It was his turn now.

“Al- ack…” He couched when he opened his mouth to call. The air still burned. “Alastor…”

It came out more a croak than a yell, and he was certain nothing and no one could have heard it over the raging winds… and yet. Something moved in front of him. A twisting, amorphous shape. He squinted at it and it slowly seemed to settle into something slightly more defined. 

It was  _ huge. _ Towering over Valentino, the louse was craning his neck. It was bigger than the wendigo by far. Probably taller than his  _ building. _ Red lights were glowing from somewhere near the top. He assumed they were its eyes. Somewhere near him, something resembling claws crept like vines, or roots. Valentino could sit against it’s form like a child up against a tree. A low, earthshaking growl joined the litany of sounds. Val swore he could feel it in his bones, gasping as it made his head ring.

“A- Al?”

It must be, but this was far beyond what he could envision his lover to be. The sight of it sent bolts of terror into his bones, an instinctual reaction to something that could swallow him in one gulp, and probably wouldn’t even feel him go down.

Val wasn’t used to feeling small.

The glowing lights got closer as Al, if it  _ was _ him, leaned down. The wind suddenly changed direction, surging at him rather than past him, like the gargantuan creature was breathing on him. Val was paralized. Pinned. A big part of him wanted to flee. Turn tail and run. Another part of him knew that this was a predator, and if he ran, it would chase.

But a bigger part of him knew that this was Alastor. And he needed help.

_ W̸̉̔̔̊̆̇͊̔̓̏ͅh̷̘̜̞̺̹̮͈͖̬̝̖̫͑̂̔̎̃͆̂͑͘ä̵̧̮̱͙́ẗ̸̛͔́̍̽̐̊̏̌̂̂̾ ̷̺̓̌͛a̸̳͌̈̄̔̍͊̐̈̕r̵̞͎̬̹͇͒ę̵͈̰̙͕̝̘̯͈͌̒̑́͝ͅ ̵̛̖̥̲̱̰̤̼̳̗̍͗̽̿ẙ̷̤͋̏o̸̦̳̞̠̙͗͊̍̽̃̋͒̅͘̕͘u̸͉̪̠͈̟̤̲͈͋̅̍̓̽̆̅̚̚͝?̴̢̪͖̦̣̟͎͈̩̗̞̠̈̊̒̈̋̚͝ _

Val shivered. The voice reminded him of graveyard dirt and screaming. Low like stone grating on stone, and it sounded angry. He looked up at the creature. Did Alastor not recognise him? If not, why hadn’t Val been snapped up already?

_ Ḫ̴̨̛̹̥̖͖͓̇͒̇̉͌̽͘͝ơ̶̛̘̾̅w̴̱̱̒̾̌͌̇̐͑̀͝͠ ̷̡͔̱͔͎̱̟̦̤͚̺̭̈́̏̿̊̓͝d̷͙̝̙̭̟̤̤̺͔̐̒͐͂̌͊̎͑a̸͙̮͋͊͠ŕ̴̢̛͓̬̟̯͆͒͑̃͗̔̚ȩ̸̦̪̯͎͗̈̌̿̽̾͘͝ ̷̢̠͇̠̗̫̪̖̞̻͈͒̓̈́͜ÿ̸͈͔̘͉͕̮́͗̋̓̆͗̀͝ö̴͉̟̬̮́̏̉͆̊̚ū̷̺̗̝̂̃͒̔̈́̑̇̓͆͝ ̸̡̼̾͘ẅ̴̲́͛͋͘ͅȩ̸̡̫͕̜̫̜̪̙͙̅̓͐̐̕͘͜͜ǎ̵͍̗̩̫͈̼͍̟̲̭̓ͅŗ̶̼̜̠̞̀͊̂͘͠ ̸̫̯̫͍͓͇̜͉̰͕̭͆̆̔̕h̶̨̰̠̗̲̮̿̈́̐̄͐͊̓̂͜ͅͅȉ̴̼̯͐̀ͅs̸̳̠͚̲̪̒̒̎͒̃̽̎̑̈ ̶̢͍̹͎͉̻̈́͗̎̋͋̿̊̿͘͝f̸̛̛̮̯̣̜͍̪̱̞̖̩̔̍̄̏͘͝͝ą̴̨͙̺̗̥̤̍c̷͓̥͆͌͂̾͂̾̇͝ḛ̵̢̛̹̥͈̻̠̿̍ͅ.̴͍͍́̉́̀̃͂̂̚.̶̨̧̫̯̮̼̘̲͓̟̤͂͗.̷̨̧̧̛̗̖̳͉̪̑̈̕ͅ _

Valentino shook his head. 

“Alastor, Al, Baby… It’s me. Your shadow saw me, remember?”

_ Ỉ̴̺̠̙̼͔͎͓̥̫̲̼̪͖̚͜l̸̢͈͖͗̀͊̐͑͘͘͝͠͝l̵̡̹̼͇͕̑͗̃͗͂̎̒̈́͠͠ṷ̵̡̧͇̻͚͙͎̥̫̤̃̐͜͝ͅs̸̨̫̩̝̎̍̈́͊͘͜i̵͖̮͙̽̂͌̄͒̿̔̆͑͋̕͘͝͝ö̶̡̢̩̪͎̭̹̲̼͚̺̝́̃̏̍̀͌̈́͂̈́̉ͅṉ̶͍͇̥͙̯̝̃  _ The creature roared and Val took a few hasty steps back. H̷̢͕͉̲̹̤͌̊͒̄̑̃̎̐e̸̡̬̣̥̐̆̍̑̆̔̋͑̄ ̸̪̔͂͗̎̋͝i̸̡͖͎͔̦͕̯͖̯̓̓̈́̍͌̍͜͜͠š̴̢̧̨͈̬̹͉͚̦̳̩̩̒̒͒̐̃̓̚͝ ̴͕͎̜͈̗̻͎͐̅̚ **_G̴̨̛̛͍̲̤̪̙͈̹̜̗̫̫͖̻̠̠̞͙͙̳̱͍̈́͂̉̏͊̎̽̂̅͛̌̽̐͂̏͊͌̌̉͌̌́̄̓́͛̾̍̄̾̕̚͘̕͘̚͝͠ͅͅͅƠ̷̡̡̨̦̣̲̹̳̘̖̮͙͖̙͔͎̺̻͔͖̠̈̑͑͌̿̚Ṅ̵̺̯̝̭͒̈́͗̓̾̄̈̎͛̄̈͑̓͆̆̍̌̀͋͆͐̍͘̚͘͠͝͝ͅḚ̶̡̧̧̧̡̧̧̛̳͇̩̥͔͈̹͔̬̥̖̮̟̠̜͖̼̤̮̱̝̲͓̪̯̝͖̭͙̟̠̌͊̐̅͛̑̊̈̒̃͋̐̎̋͑͗̑̒͑̔̓̃̿͗͑̓͂̚̕͝ͅͅ_ **

No, babe… Not an illusion. Real deal. See?”

He held out all four hands like it would prove his point, only to windmill them when the creature roared at him again and the resulting blast of magic knocked him over. He pushed himself up on his hands and looked up at the towering monster.

**_L̷̨̧̺͔̹̻͓͖̱̪̭̥̮̄̍̑̀̈́́̇̐̈́̈͜͠i̵̢̛̬̫͇̠̲̰̞͙̻͚̺͂̔͑̿͌̕͝͝e̴̡̲̼͈̱̲̦̝̻͛͌̈́̒̊̎̈́͝s̸̞̥̥̊ͅ.̷͙̿̑͊͗̌̒̓̌̔͊̿̿̓.̷͍͙͎͕̞̹̣͚͍̃͋͐̈́͛̍͊̐́̊̀͗̂͠.̷̡̛̰̠̍̅͋̒̈̇̂̎͊͝_ **

The little warmth around them had started to sap out of the air. Val had no idea whether it was intentional or not, but he could feel himself starting to shiver. He helplessly floundered for something to say. He had no idea how to get through to Alastor that he wasn’t some trick… It was like the day he’d finally mustered the courage to ask Alastor for a date and Alastor had spent the entire time expecting an ambush. Despite Valentino’s every effort, he hadn’t been able to get the deer to relax.

Val had considered the whole night a disaster, and at the end he had poured his heart out in a clumsy confession-slash-apology that his intentions were 100% genuine but it was clear that Alastor wasn’t into it and he was sorry for wasting his time. Alastor had considered him for a few moments before offering his own abode for dinner the next night. Val had been convinced that he was going to be eaten, but one of them had to start trusting first.

A chance to try again.

“H- Hey… Do you remember our first date?” He asked the creature, changing tact. It cocked its head a little. It wasn’t exactly an inviting gesture, but at least Val knew he had it’s attention. “Our first  _ real _ one, I mean.”

Val didn’t get a response, per se, but Alastor stared at him intently. Val swallowed and continued, hoping this would work.

“You invited me around for dinner.” Val recounted, trying to meet the creature’s eye with little success. “I half expected to  _ be _ the dinner, but I came anyway because even then, I was so utterly in love…”

He chuckled and glanced down a moment. Smiling at his hands.

“You teleported me to your room in the hotel. You made jambalaya and dirty rice for me, your mother’s recipe, you said; because you had a feeling I wouldn’t enjoy your takes on it. We started out just talking, but as you got into making the dish, you started singing.”

Val could see the memory clear as day. The scent of cajun cooking in the air as Alastor danced along to music of his own making. The creature was beginning to shift uncomfortably, magic and storm roiling around it.

_ H̵͕̭̲̬̎̃̒͊͗̽̕̚͜o̴̪͍̰̠̣̾̐͊͠w̸̝̣̖͎̓͋̅͊̊͘͝ ̶͚̼̘̭́d̵͉̫͚̟͔̻̏̉́͝ͅo̷̺̼̪̖̽͌́͋̑ ̵͚̭͔̣̫̯̱̑͗̇̎ÿ̸̻̰̙͎̭̳͕́̂̆̈́̏̾̿ơ̶̡̰̬͕̘͈̬͗̈͂͐͋̌̓̕ų̴̮̞̫͕͖͉̠̬̅ ̸̳͚͎̍̚̕͠k̵͉̩̺̮̙̗̘̉ņ̷͓̓̈́͌o̴͖̪̖̝̩̹͖͋̏́͒̔w̶̤̦̹̻͓̳̮̮̾͆͑͜ ̴̫̔t̸̪͆̂͑̌ḫ̷̨̘͓̦̯̫̯̳̒̚į̶̜̱͔͕̘̺͆͊͐ŝ̸̢̢͙̝͈̘͓̈́̓̈́̅͝?̴͓͕̙̖̿͝ _

“You sang ‘Dream a Little Dream of Me’ while you cooked…”

_ S̴̡͎̟̜͐͒̽͐t̷͕͒͐͆̓̉͘͠͝ọ̵̥̘̌̋͋p̴͓̣͕̀͜ͅ.̶͈̻̤̹̖̣̅͗̈̃̾͂͋̕ ̷̼͈͉͇͚̭̥̅͂̌̉̊͝ͅT̴͈̊̕h̸̢͕̻̤͈̞͛͒̋̚ͅó̶̐̀̀̅̓̐͆̒ͅs̷̘̠̄̏͂͝ë̸̝͍̦͇̦̘̘͆̈̑ ̶̪͔̪̥̩̆ͅm̴̛̛̥͍̘͉̑͒̓͠e̷̠͂̿̄m̶̧̞̼̹͚̤̲͇͐ö̷̫́̈̅r̶̛̪̎̀̕ȉ̵̢̛̠̼͇͙͇̟̜̖̕͝͠e̷̢̩̙͍͔̱̞̲͌̄ͅs̶̯̞̥͖̮̦̳͓̖̓͊̀̃ ̵̡̛̮̏͂͗͒̾̈a̵̤̳̠͉̍͑͒̑̐͠ŗ̵̹̼͙̣e̷̛͈̿̾͆ ̷̭͕̪̹̱̎͒͜ͅp̵͚̠̦̼͒͗r̵̠̣͈̝̓͆̈́̾͠e̶̙̪̖̹͊̓̐̄̐̀c̶̠̟̹̯̱͈̯͕̙͌i̷̭̬̖̲͑̆̅̽̂̚͝ǒ̴̧̧͙̙̦̻̱̖ṷ̴͈͇̦̤̤̗̼̊̀̋̈́͆̎̋ş̴̞̟̭̖̹̩̒͌͋̈́.̵͙̚ͅ.̶̤̼̼͈͕͑͋̏̄̈́͘͝.̵̱̔̉́ _

Val looked back up at Alastor. His story was doing something, he could see it. He pressed on through the dropping temperatures. The wind had faded to background noise. It was just the two of them here.

“It was delicious, and I told you as much. You were really insistent on which plate was mine and which was yours. I thought I would be cute and swipe some off your plate.” 

Val laughed a little more, his shoulders shaking both from laughter and the cold. 

“Yours was so spicy I fell out of my chair. I thought I’d been kicked by a horse. You laughed at my misery, but gave me some milk to help the spice. And then for dessert you made coffee and beignets.”

_ Y̴̳̭̟̦͋̓͒͠o̵̥̱̭͑͆̐ų̵̣̙̭͋̌͛̚.̵̧̡̛̛̺̙̻̞̦̏͆̓̅̑͗͝.̸̡͔̻̺̼̥̊̒̾͆̓̀͊́͝.̶͍͈̙̔͜ _

Val saw something thick and dark red drop from the creature’s eyes. It fell in great drops and splashed on the ground. It smelled of rot and copper, Val was almost certain it was old blood, but he ignored that. 

“It was the best damn date of my life.”

There was only silence above him now. The creature had stopped trying to protest. Only the hollow howling of the magic storm. Valentino waited, shielding his eyes from the storm, for Alastor to respond. The silence stretched like a taut rubber band, before...

_.̸̧̫̮͓͎̼̰̬̭̰̇.̸͍͊̈̒ͅ.̸̡̛̞̭̯̥̩͖̖̩͈̮͔̋̊̔͛̏̈́̌̾̄̕͜͜ͅḨ̷̼̜͙̥̼̫̙͓̱̱͉̤͛͊̔͊̋̍̉̏̋͂́̔͌̔̕o̸͎͈̍̇̓̉͗̏̅̑̽̍͑͛̕w̸̢̢̢̨̛̛̖̜̳̟̬͈̼̾̾̃̒̒̐̎̃̆͋̇̚ͅͅ?̷͎̠̙̤͉͔̟͈͗͌̎ _

“Al?”

_ Ḩ̷̼̜͙̥̼̫̙͓̱̱͉̤͛͊̔͊̋̍̉̏̋͂́̔͌̔̕o̸͎͈̍̇̓̉͗̏̅̑̽̍͑͛̕w̸̢̢̢̨̛̛̖̜̳̟̬͈̼̾̾̃̒̒̐̎̃̆͋̇̚ͅͅ ̶̭̤͌̈͛̅̅̐͝ą̶̡̻͕̲̟̯̼̞̲̜͖̭͚̪̅̍͑̂̓͋́͂͘͠r̷͚̘̼̺̤̽̓́͌̓̃̂͒͛̈́̕e̵͖͚̹̻̯̥͌ ̴̡̛̝̫̗̦͍̱̩̱̘̈͛̿̽̄͊͘̕͘͜ÿ̵̡͇̞̮̖͈͎́̒̇̓̉o̸̡̢̳̳͎̠͔̙̥̜͎͍̜͇͗́͗̔̎͝ų̶̯̱͚̦̅͑͒́̉̽̒̌̌͘͜͝ ̸̧̡̡̝̘̱̱̹̱̲͔̼̹͌̄̅͊̒͝ͅh̷̡̩͓͖͙̳̻͖̘̯͑̑͌͘͘è̸̞̫̥͉̝̥̠͓͓̭͇̬̓̓͗̎͐̓͌̅̈͒̄̚̕͜ͅȑ̶̫͙͔̽̋̅̄͋͐͐̓͊̔̚͜͝e̷̝͒͒͆̐?̵͍̣̜̘͉̟̘̬̖͍͋̍̎̈͌̉̆̒̚͜͠ _

“I met Cora. In the Void. She helped me come back…”

_ C̷̡͖̤͕̦͎̤͚̣͇̥̣͇͚̱̋̉́͠o̵͓̟̹͕͈̟͕͔͍̓͑̊́́͜͜ͅr̸̛̳̪̪̱̯̫̽̃̓͆͌̍̈́̇̓̿͝ͅa̶̢̢̡̯̺͉̳͙͓̯͚͗̇̏̿͛͑̏̎͌̇͊͜͝͠?̸̢̛͍̭̗̗̻̱̱̖̳̂́̏̇̒̚ _

“Yeah. Real character that one. I can see why you two got along.”

_ Į̵̲̯̯̂̍̈͛̍̆͗͐̚t̸̢͎͙̭͍̜͙͍̘͔͑͗̑̄̐̽͒̚ͅͅ'̸̡̨͚̹͈͇̥͍̝͇͔̲̂͗͋̍ͅŝ̶̞̌͌͛̿̈́͗̍̈́͊̾ ̷̱͉̜̎̈́͆͊̃̌̒͒̈́̓͝y̸̨͙͉̭̺̺͇̤̻̪̩̒̎̈́͒̏͌̈́͛̅͗̑̽͛̇̀o̵̢̧̖͓̞̐͐̕u̷̦̻͗͋͑̋̈́̍̑̉̃͛̂͂͝.̶̧̙̬̦͇͋͌͐̑̅̒̊͝͝.̶̧͇͈̼̳̠̻͓̭̉̋͗̈̽̽͒̈͂̄͜.̴̡̡͎̭̦̜̝̲̞̎̂̇͑̈͐͌̌̓͒̿͛ Y̵̘̣̹̅̉̔̈́̂̃̚͝o̶̡̻̱̺͚̰̤̼̣̦̿̈̎̔͝u̸̧̡̫̬͙̫̻͍̳͙̿͐'̵̠͇̌̂͜͠͝r̵͕̝͍̓͛͌̾̌̽̇ę̶̢̧̛͇̠̯̜̫̟͎͑̽́ ̸̧̢̧̛̩͙̭̜̓̈̒̈́̇̒̏̓͆̐̚͠ͅh̸͈͕̋̓̓͒͐̈̂̋̐͆̎̕ͅe̶̡͕͔̣̺̞͋̊́̂̈̇̾͆̿́͛̚͜͝ͅr̷͈͎̮͓͔̝̪̹͓͑̉̀̈́͒̆͜͝͝ę̵̟̊͑̋̃̓͂̾̄̓̇̈̕͝.̴̩̥͓̥̆̉͝.̸̢͇̞̳͇̙̓̆̃̎̌͑̇̓͌̈́͗̈́̓͝.̶̥̱͓̼̟̟̻̍̂̂̂̂̾ _

Val smiled and felt something in his gut unwind. Alastor leaned down and Val could finally see past the shadows clinging to the other demon. Behemoth, a creature made of bone and rotten flesh and solid darkness. Rotting blood leaked from black eyes, like pits, empty sockets in a great skull. Clumps of ooze-spiked fur stuck out from every direction and plumes of smokey magic that made up the storm surged from them. Val realized that the power around him had literally exploded out of Alastor. The power in the air had somehow gotten heavier as Alastor got closer and it was hard to breathe.

Valentino didn’t think he’d ever seen anything so breathtaking. 

Val reached out his arms until he was mere centimeters from it’s snout.

Alastor moved forward the rest of the way, bumping his nose into the louse’s hand, and Va; touched dry, smooth bone. He was only just tall enough to reach. Anyone of normal height would have been staring down teeth as big as them.

“Hey you…”

Val muttered, letting another hand press against Alastor’s snout, scratching lightly. A soft crooning noise started, filling the air around them. Replacing the angry howling of the magic around them as the storm receded. Tendrils seeped from the air around them, slipping back into the wounds they had burst from.

_ Y̶̦̤̫̝̜̯̤̳̥̺̮̭̝̤̆̂̐̊̓̈́̽͐̎͌̋̚̚ͅo̷͓̩̥̙͂́̈́̀̂̈́͒̓̋̎͋̀̏̚͝ų̸̨͎̣͚̺͙͔̼͇̲̯̼̔ͅ.̴̤͓̗̥͉͕̦̳̱̭̠͊͂́̍͂͂͐͜.̴̬̰͈̥͈͕̜̼̌̈́̉̐̎͑͒̔͒̓̑͌͝.̶̖͙̪͑͒̿ _

“Me.”

_ N̷̨̡̧̢̹̬̘͉̮̖̮̺̗͋̽͛̅e̴͕̪̹̯̝͓͓͕̾̊v̶̢̱͉̻̜͙̪̝͙̗͙̺̞̓̊̇̏e̵̯͍̬̞̝͙̥̖̾ͅr̸̛̲̙̪͙̬̲̦̝͚̩̜̪͔͎̈̄͂̾͋͋̅̅͘͝ͅ ̶̠̥̖̯̑̾͗̓̊̅̈́̿̎͂̍̚l̴̨͖̫̜̻̲̟̮̖͉͋̒́͗̅͜è̴̤̤̑͝à̶͓̲͈͎̮̤͖͕͍͈̩ͅv̵̡͎̭̙͕̪̺̘̣͌͋̌̐̉̇ͅȩ̶̨̨͎̰̺͓͚͎̩̫̼̯̔̂̓̈́̓̓͛̓̈͠ͅͅ ̸̢̹̝͕͈͉͇̇̑͂͆͠m̸̡̺̿͗͑͑̔̈́̂̆̇ě̴̙̮̈́̄̀͑͂̿̎͗̾̑̏̋̌͝ ̸̲͍̄â̶̢̢̹͔̬̱͕̅̈́̓̚͝͝͝g̶̢̢͖̪̲̬͓̘̖̲̳̫̟̟̳̔̏͛̎͒̂̚͘a̷̠͔͉͔̠̲̫̝̖̋̔̾̅̄̇̍į̷̥͇̖̣̪̹̰̐͂̉̊̆̽̋̎͘n̷̼͍͉̦̤̫̰̽͊̂̒̐͂̂͝.̸̝̬͇͗̐͑͌̃̄ ̴̝̤̠͍̱̦̣̩̰̤̬̭̟̒͊P̵͉͇̣̭̹͍̀̔͑̌͐̓l̵̘̭̦̖͙̱̮͚͚̋ͅe̷̫̬̙̯͓͂͑̉a̶̛͚̳͌̅̅s̶̭͎̖̉̊̿̉̈́̿̈͝e̶̬̦̭̪͙̜͈̙̭̳̠͑̈́̏̽̾͝͝.̸̨̫̄̋.̸̢̢̧̺̺̰̯̯̩̻̩͖͙̏̅̕ͅͅ.̸̡̧̝̪̖̗̭̖͖̲̦̌̈́̏̃͋̊̓̋̅͘͝͠ ̶͓̲̳̣̿̇I̶̢̛̬̺͛͌͐̃̋͝͝͠ ̸̢̛̞̭̱̼͇̠̞̦̫̟̻̘͇̈́̓͗̽̆̔͘͠͠ç̴̖͇̹̞̫̮̭̱̗̰̮͚̲̪̎ơ̵̹̺̥͚̱͖̥͙̗̍̃̍͑̃̎͊̈́̔̕͝u̷̥͉̩̳͛̾̋͆̑͗̅̂̽͂͘l̷͎̹̹͚̲̻̓̓͋͆̋̾͋̀͆̒͘͝͠ḑ̸̪̹̠̳̯̦̪̳̻̮̮̓̓̋̚n̷̛̛̛̠̞̦͒͗̍̋̃̎͒̈́̊̂̀̓'̵̛̯̯̜͎̗̯̣̼̤̒͂̕͜ẗ̴̡͎̻̜̻͙́̌͒̓̋̓͒ ̶͖̼̥̣̞̣̮̎̏̽́͆̈́̚͘͝t̶̡̡͔̩̯͓͕̱̟͙͇̗̖͛͗͂́á̴̫̮̭͙̗͕͖̹̰̿͒k̵̡̢̡̫̣̰̖̻̯͓̪͚̰̩͋̑e̴̢͚̘̮̼͈͚̫͜͜ ̶̢̘̣̥̖̳̦̼̘̦̗͔͍̽̈́͋̃͊͘͝i̷͖̝͇͂̔̊͋ṯ̸̛̱̮͎͍̥͖̘̳̖̞̗̍́̈̌̐͘̚̕.̷̡̠̩̫̪̀̆̄̄̎̽́͛̉̍̈͠͠ͅ _

“Don’t you worry Alastor.” 

Val rubbed his fingers in soft circles on the beast’s snout. He didn’t know if Alastor could feel it, but he liked the idea of the gesture.

“Don’t worry Alastor. I’m not going anywhere.

_ G̸̨̹̖̙͈͕͋͋͋ó̷̪͉̰͚̮͗ơ̶̺̟̻̰͙͂̓̆͊͌̿͠d̵̟̳̻̼̜̯̀̃̍.̸̩͖͎̟͇̺̆̽̐͂̾̐͋ ̴͍͍͛͊̉̂Ì̶͎̺͉̀̔͊͗̚͜͝ͅ ̵̢̛͙̜̼̌͆̽̕̕͝ͅh̷̼͓̾̉̀̾̂͝a̸̛̫̤͊̉̏̑͝v̷͈̭̲̮͂̄̃̈́̅̌̐̋̕e̴̺͋͗͜ ̷̛͓̠̳̼̫̞̐̅̓̾s̸̯̺̼͈̦̘̬̥̅̃̽̈́̒o̶̘̙̙͜͜͝ͅm̴̗͕̫̜͙̠̜̼͎̽̔́e̴̥̭̝̻͔͆̄̂̉̓́͊̕t̴̞̖̜͓̊ͅh̴̰̎̔̑̽̑̅͜į̴̧̺̮̞̣̖̐̈̄͛̒͐͜͠n̶̢̢̛̪͓͈̪͆̍ͅg̴͓̗͔̈̏͑̋̀ ̵̼͉̕͘ͅt̸̨̻͐̒̎̅o̶͉͙͚̭͙̱̖͌͒ ̴͉̲̅͆̆̅̊̓͘͘͠ã̵̍̕ͅs̷̡̨͉͚͉̲͖͉͛̅͒k̵̠̣͔͍̣̮̃̆̀͝ ̴̡̡̠͓͙̙͗͠ỷ̸̱͗͘͠o̷̖̭̖̬̫̓̉̃̌̅ͅȕ̵̺̜̙̹̀͑̌̍̈̐͠.̵͇͍̀ _

“What?”

Bu Alastor’s eyes had already slipped shut. Val smiled fondly. He could ask later.

~~~

Somewhere far, far,  _ far _ away, Cora listened to the thunderous growling cease.The void around her was silent once more.

“Nicely done, you buggy bastard.”

She muttered, getting to her feet and twirling a pair of gold and pink sunglasses between her fingers. It was a pity they didn’t glitter the way they might in actual light, but it was still plenty shiny. He hadn’t noticed her swiping them when she pushed him through the portal, and she considered it the least he owed her after what she’d done. 

She got to her feet and started whistling as she sauntered away. Her job here was done. Universe saved, dimensioned stabilized.

Now…

On to other pressing business.

In a swish of fabric turned the rustling of feathers, the black figure in the endless grey abyss slowly vanished away to nothing.

~~~

It took Alastor several days to calm down enough to shrink himself down into something that could fit into a building. In that time, Val sat with him in the wreckage of the districts Alastor had destroyed. Val had been distraught over the destruction of his building, his grief had made Alastor whimper like a wounded dog.

_ (I̸ ̵c̷a̸n̸ ̴f̶i̸x̸ ̵i̴t̷,̴ ̸I̷ ̷p̵r̷o̵m̷i̶s̵e̵.̸ ̴L̴i̴k̷e̵ ̸n̷o̵t̶h̵i̶n̷g̵ ̶h̸a̵p̷p̸e̶n̸e̷d̸.̸.̴.̵ _

_ “No need Al, I can rebuild... You shouldn’t bust a magic valve for me.” _

_ I̷ ̷w̷a̶n̵t̶ ̴t̸o̴.̵ ̸P̵l̵e̵a̷s̴e̵ ̶l̴e̸t̴ ̷m̸e̴ ̷d̸o̷ ̶t̵h̶a̸t̸ ̶f̷o̴r̸ ̸y̴o̸u̸.̵ ̵B̴e̵s̶i̶d̵e̵s̴,̶ ̴I̸ ̷h̸a̷v̵e̷ ̶a̴ ̸f̷e̸e̸l̷i̷n̶g̴ ̶t̶h̴e̷ ̴k̵i̷n̷g̸ ̵w̴i̸l̵l̸ ̴i̵n̵s̵i̵s̸t̶ ̶I̶ ̴h̷e̵l̴p̶ ̸r̸e̶p̶a̸i̶r̵ ̴t̴h̷i̴s̶.̶ _

_ “...Alright, if you’re sure. But let’s wait until you can stand without knocking it over again.” _ )

In that crater, they got several visitors, including but not limited to, the king, who did indeed want Alastor’s help in rebuilding.

_ (“What a mess you made my friend! Quite a spectacular show!” _

_ I̵ ̷a̷p̷o̴l̶o̴g̷i̴s̶e̵ ̴f̸o̷r̴ ̶t̵h̸e̴ ̷d̷a̵m̸a̴g̷e̶ _

_ “Ha! This is nothing at all! As long as you can clean up your mess, I couldn't give a hoot!”) _

Vox and Velvet, who had been petrified to see Val’s building go down, had dogpiled him much to Alastor’s anxiety.

_ (“We thought you were dead!” _

_ “Not that we were worried” _

_ “You cried, Voxxie. Don’t deny it…” _

_ “I don’t even have eyes!” _

_ “Err… Guys? Not that I don’t appreciate the hug, but Alastor’s getting a bit shifty back here.” _

_ “Bambi can wait.”) _

The princess,

_ (“Hey Alastor.” _

_ C̸h̷a̴r̶l̷i̷e̵,̵ ̴d̸e̵a̷r̷.̴ _

_ “You feeling okay?” _

_ M̴u̴c̷h̵ ̷b̴e̵t̶t̴e̶r̷ ̴n̴o̸w̵.̴.̵.̶ ̵H̶o̶w̸ ̸f̴a̴r̴e̴s̵ ̸t̸h̵e̷ ̵H̶o̸t̴e̵l̴ ̸i̶n̴ ̴m̶y̶ ̴a̸b̸s̶e̷n̸c̷e̶?̷ _

_ “I’m glad you asked! Reggie has made so much progress! And the group sessions have been going amazing! There's been one or two fires, but baby steps, right? I think we should look into getting an outdoor space….”) _

Al’s little entourage,

_ (“Mr Alastor!” _

_ “Oi, nice of you to spare us the theatrics, ya bastard.” _

_ I̸s̵ ̷t̷h̸a̴t̷ ̷r̵e̵l̵i̸e̴f̶ ̴I̶ ̴d̷e̸t̴e̴c̴t̵ ̵i̴n̴ ̵y̶o̸u̸r̵ ̸v̵o̷i̴c̴e̸,̵ ̶H̵u̴s̷k̴e̴r̶?̴ _

_ “You wish, asshole. Just glad you didn’t trash my favorite casino.” _

_ G̴l̵a̴d̶ ̷t̴o̴ ̴s̷e̸e̶ ̶y̸o̸u̸ ̸s̴t̸i̸l̶l̵ ̶h̸a̵v̶e̴ ̶y̵o̷u̵r̸ ̸p̵r̵i̵o̸r̸i̷t̴i̷e̸s̴  _

_ “Damn straight.”) _

And even Angel Dust plucked the courage to approach.

_ (“So… Hard for me to stay in the studio now, huh?” _

_ “Not the time, Angel Cakes.” _

_ “Sorry Daddy.” _

_ “...Did you want something?” _

_ “Just… I heard what happened. Can’t say I- ...Smiles just loves you a whole lot, huh? Good for him. And you.”) _

All this time, Val had stayed resolutely by Alastor’s side. In fairness, he doubted Alastor would react well to being left alone right now anyway, but it was also a matter of principle. He’d been curled against the behemoth body in the nights and never strayed far in the day.

On the morning of the third day, he woke not to the course fur of the monster but with his head resting in a bony lap. He opened his eyes and found himself looking up at Alastor’s smiling face.

“Al!”

“Hello, darling.”

Val scrambled to his knees and scooped Alastor into a hug. A bold move, but Alastor allowed it. It had been three days here, but accounting his time in the void, Val felt like he hadn’t seen his lover’s face in eons, and it filled his chest with something warm.

“I missed you, babe. Missed your stupid face.” Val placed a soft kiss on the tip of the nose adorning said stupid face. “You’re always beautiful, but this is the you I love most.”

“Yes, well…” Alastor’s face turned a slightly darker grey around his nose and cheeks and Val grinned wider. “I finally managed to, er, pull myself together. As it may be.”

Val gave him a smile and reached up with one of his lower hands to run his claws through Alastor’s hair and play with his ears. The deer’s ear flicked at the contact, but after a considerable pause, relaxed and let it happen. They stayed like that a while, just relishing in the gradual return to normal, before Alastor looked up at Val and said:

“Dear, when I was… Bigger. Did I… say anything?”

“What do you mean?”

“I can’t remember everything, but I remember telling you something important. Something we would need to talk about later.”

Val wracked his brain.

“You don’t remember what it was?”

Alastor shook his head, forever grin somehow thoughtful.

“I… Like that, I am bigger than my skin. When I come back together, not all of me fits.”

Huh. That sounded disconcerting. Val shook his head.

“I can’t remember anythi- Oh! You did say you had something to ask me, but fell asleep before you said what it was. I totally forgot.”

“Ask you… Ah!”

Alastor’s eyes went wide and his ears dipped in surprise as the memory seemed to hit him. His cheeks and face went a darker grey. Val raised an eyebrow at this reaction. What on earth did Al want to ask?

“What is it?”

“It- I was going to ask this… later. But it seems my more primal side has made the call for me.”

“Al?”

“I have found myself wanting… And after this experience I am more certain than ever, not that I would force you into anything and if you aren’t ready I understand. You are hellborn, after all, and I’m not entirely sure how that sort of thing works down here…”

Val creased his brow at Alastor’s anxious chattering and placed a gent;y hand on Alastor’s arm. Alastor looked at him and seemingly decided to just spit it out because the next words the deer demon said were:

“Will you marry me?”

Val found himself frozen at the question, brain emptying. It was like when Alastor made those record scratch, ringing noises. His mind just playing white noise. He simply sat there with his hands still in Alastor’s hair and coiled around his waist. He was vaguely aware of Alastor still talking in the background, but more of his mind was playing those words on repeat. Over and over, examining them for some sort of other meaning, some other way that could have been meant, because there was no way Alastor just  _ proposed to him. _

Proposed.

Like, asked him to marry him. Marriage like a wedding, and being husbands, and taking vows….

“-do apologise for the lack of theatricality but I figured you’d have had quite enough of that over the past few days-”

Alastor was prattling on, seemingly unaffected, but there were tension lines around his eyes that made his smile seem forced. He was still anxious. Val blinked and realised that he hadn’t said anything yet.

“Yeah…”

Val croaked, throat feeling thick.

“As I thought, a little reprieve is very much needed-”

“Wait, no, shit- Al, I meant yes I’ll marry you!”

Alastor turned to face him. On the surface his expression is the same as ever. Manic, wild eyes, ghastly-grinner smile beaming at full force. But Val could see past that. Could see past to the tentative hope inside.

“Are- Are you sure?”

“Fuck yes, I’m sure.” Val said, a somewhat hysterical giggle bubbling up from the depths of his chest. “Al, you could have asked me the first day we met and I would have been sure. I’ve wanted you to be mine since your first radio broadcast.”

Val swept Alastor up in an embrace and peppered his cheeks with kisses, his giggle growing to an outright laugh, which Alastor soon joined. The two of them spinning and laughing in the epicentre of a giant crater of magical destruction.

“We’re getting married!” Val cheered.

“Not before you put this on.” Alastor said, wriggling out of Val’s arms and summoning a red velvet box. The deer demon opened it and inside was a ruby and diamond encrusted engagement ring embedded on a black metal band. The metal seemed to swirl with hidden shadow, the jewels seemed to glow. 

Val had never seen anything more beautiful… 

Oh wait. 

Yes he had. 

He looked back at Alastor’s face and smiled so wide his grin could match Alastor’s.

“Isn’t a gentleman supposed to kneel?”

“I’m short enough compared to you as it is!”

“You’re perfect. It’s perfect.”

Val told him, slipping the ring on his finger. It fit perfectly. Val leaned in and took a kiss on the lips. Chaste and shallow and sweet, but electric with emotion. Alasto bore it for about ten seconds before springing away, surveying the damage around them.

“Now, fiance mine!” The deer demon said happily. “Let’s get to rebuilding. You’ll need your studio back!”

Val nodded, looking down at the ring. He knew he had the goofiest smile on his face.

“Yes I will. After all. We have a wedding to plan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THEY'RE ENGAGED! WHOOO!
> 
> And it was Alastor who asked too, who'd have thunk it? 
> 
> Dream a Little Dream of Me is actually a very old song that was released for the first time two years before Alastor died. As a radio star and a music lover, I expect he'd have at least heard it.
> 
> I hope ya'll aren't againt plot, because I have a superb backlog of ideas on the backburner. That said, if ya'll have prompts for me to do in the meantime so updates don't take a million years, please let me know.
> 
> Transcript of the distorted text:
> 
> 1) "What are you?"  
> 2) "How dare you wear his face?"  
> 3) "Illusion' [] "He is GONE."  
> 4) "Lies."  
> 5) "How do you know this?"  
> 6) "Stop. Those memories are precious."  
> 7) "You."  
> 8) "How?"  
> 9) "How are you here?"  
> 10) "Cora?"  
> 11) "It's you... You're here."  
> 12) "You..."  
> 13) "Never leave me again. Please. I couldn't take it."  
> 14) "Good, I have something to ask you."  
> 15) "I can fix it, I promise. Like nothing happened."  
> 16) "I want to, please let me do this for you. Besides, I have a feeling the king will insist I help repair this."  
> 17) "I apologise for the damage."  
> 18) "Charlie, Dear."  
> 19) "Much better now, how fares the hotel in my absence?"  
> 20) "Is that relief I detect in your voice, Husker?"  
> 21) "Glad to see you still have your priorities."


	14. Scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Val has a nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry folks! End of the uni semester is kicking my ass a little. I know it's short, but here's a little something to tide ya'll over. Building up to a bigger plot point ever so ingeniously suggested by the amazing @Huntingpeople. But in the meantime, have Val freaking out.

_ Glowing red eyes, sharp yellow teeth, a roar that rattled the sky. Valentino could feel something enormous and predatory looming over him. His heart froze in his chest for a moment before he relaxed. It was just Alastor. _

_ He knew this. _

_ He reached out his hand for Alastor to touch. To reconnect and let the deer demon come back to himself. The beast leaned down. Down so very far. It was so huge, it could swallow him whole and probably not even feel him going down. He swallowed another instinctive surge of fear. _

_ There was no danger here.  _

_ Not for him. _

_ Or so he tried to convince himself. _

_ He stared into glowing pits in a cervine skull. Hot breath huffed around him, stinking of those who got this close before him, and closer. Too close. _

_ “H-Hey Al.” _

_ The beast looked at him, or perhaps past him. It was hard to tell.  _

_ The stare wasn’t… present.  _

_ It lacked Alastor’s… spark. Something Val was so sure had been there the first time,,,, _

_ The beast snarled at him and surged forwards. Val’s blood went cold, but he wouldn’t run. This was Alastor, he wouldn’t hurt him… He wouldn’t- _

_ The burn of corrosive magic became more and more intense, and then unbearable. Val could feel something wet on his legs and arms and he somehow just knew that the magic had eaten through his skin. Red whisps picked up the blood and they floated like vapor into Alastor’s mouth. _

_ Al’s magic was… Predigesting him. _

_ The beast was still lunging forward and the jaws were wide open and Val realised too late that he should be running- _

_ The final snap of jaws closing shook Val’s skull. _

~~~

Val was suddenly aware of a weight on top of him, and a terrible pain in his skull. He cringed away. The monster must have bitten down on it… Wait, he had to go! He tried to get tpo his feet but he seemed to be entangled in something. Maybe tendrils of magic, coming to drag him to the beast’s gaping maw… He had to run, it would eat him- There was no Alastor left in it, just a hungry animal!

“Valentino!”

His shoulders were grabbed and a grey face got in his field of vision. He squinted his eyes, trying to figure out what he was seeing, but then he saw a flash of yellow fangs and his heart was racing again.

The beast was here.

Only the beast had fangs like that.

He tried to struggle away but the beast still had his shoulders. He pushed and squirmed but it didn’t help and eventually he simply curled into a ball and hid his face, hoping the creature would make it fast.

“My love, whatever is the matter?”

That voice.

Crackling radio static and background channels and filled with no shortage of concern. He blinked and pulled his face out of where it was hiding in his shoulders. Red eyes and grey sin, not bone and coarse fur. 

Alastor. The real him, and not the monster from the storm.

He was in his bedroom. Alastor had stayed the night. He was entangled in silk sheets and furs.

“Al…” His voice was shaky and hoarse. “I-”

“Are you alright, my dear?”

Alastor asked. He looked uncertain as to whether or not to get closer. Val made the choice for him and pulled Al closer. His antennae tapped against Alastor’s hair, Val’s four arms snaked around Alastor’s chest and waist. He focused on Alastor, warm and small, not huge and corrosive. The light static surrounding him drowned out the roaring winds.

And from this position, he couldn’t see the teeth.

“Nightmare.”

Val muttered by way of explanation before closing his eyes and slumping against Alastor. The deer demon tentatively stroked down the louse’s back.

“It- It’s alright love. I’m here.”

“I know.” Val said. “I know.”

And he did, but some part of Val couldn’t help but remember the monster that leaked under Alastor's skin and get nervous. He cast the thought aside for now. That was an issue for another day. For now he buried his head in Alastor’s hair and tried to slow his breathing.

“I just.. Let’s just go back to sleep.

Alastor was whole and sane and here with him, not some rampaging beast.

“Never leave again.” Val whispered suddenly. “Please.”

Alastor’s antlers knocked against him gently as the deer nodded. Humming sleepily.

“I’ll always be with you, love.”

Val nodded and he felt Alastor drift to sleep beneath him. 

He let the fact that his lover was small enough to fit in his arms lull him enough to follow.


	15. Update: Requests Open

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOT A CHAPTER - An update on what's going on

Hey guys! Been a while. 

I know it's been a hot minute since i updated. Sorry about that. I had a lot of plot stuff lined up and it all got very overwhelming all of a sudden. Put myself under too much pressure and writing stopped being fun.

I'm putting the plotty stuff (the wedding, a big upcoming plot point, ect) on hold for a minute, in favor of some oneshot style stories to get back into the swing of things.

So! Essentially i want to know if anyone has requests.

I won't necessarily do them all, but i need some inspiration. So if anyone has somethinf they want to see, please do let me know!

Thanks for understanding, and sorry i dissapeared on y'all. 

See you soon, hopefully!


End file.
